Nightmares Do Exist
by Cherry-stone96
Summary: When Bella returns to Forks to meet her real parents Charlie and Renee, she immediately knows what is wrong with the mysterious Cullen family. The question is, what will she do about her growing attraction to Jasper? Feedback appreciated x
1. Chapter 1

**A/N**

**This is my first fan fic so please be nice :D **

**I'm not really sure how this entire process works so if I did anything wrong or do in the future tell me.**

**This is just an introduction to the whole story. If even one person gives me a positive review or adds to story alert I'll keep writing :D I'm not trying to blackmail anyone here haha I just want to know what you guys think.**

**Rated T for safety's sake**

BPOV

Okay, okay, okay. I took a deep breath and let it out again. I could do this.

I jumped out of my truck and slammed the door with more force than was needed. Instinctively I cowered and slapped myself upside the head. Stop being silly Bella. These were your _parents_ for god's sake.

It was a little hard to convince yourself to walk into a house containing two people you hadn't seen since you were born. Admittedly, I was nineteen now so they didn't have any legal rights over me anymore, but blood was thicker than water right? I frowned at myself and laughed with an edge of hysteria. That made no sense at all.

Charlie and Renee had been too young to look after me properly. Sally had always stressed to me that they very much wanted to keep me but financial problems got in the way. I was never sure whether to believe her or not.

I sucked in another freezing breath and started towards the house. I was okay, I was okay. I repeated this like a sacred mantra while I gently pushed open the gate and walked up the path.

My legs kept feeling like they wouldn't support me and I gave myself a mental slap. Stop being such a wimp. You survived being in the home didn't you? You survived all those horrible years with Sarah and Mark didn't you? I involuntarily shivered just at the names, I couldn't help the reaction. Loud noises still scared me too.

*FLASHBACK*

_I cowered underneath my bed as I heard the wet crunching of Sarah ripping into the poor human. If I hadn't been so terrified, I would have been screaming my head off._

_Suddenly there was a whumph as something hit the bed above my head. I wouldn't think about it, I couldn't think about it. Unfortunately, I couldn't put it off for long. A wet stream of liquid started to run down my cheek. The blood was soaking through the duvet, through the mattress, down onto me._

_I couldn't help it, I screamed._

*FLASHBACK OVER*

I found myself suddenly at the door and lifted my hand to knock. Before my knuckles could even touch the wood, the door flew open and I was enveloped in a desperate hug.

"BELLA!"

I looked down in shock. The woman holding me around the waist was about 5 5", a little pocket rocket. I couldn't see her face as it was pressed tightly into my body but one thing I did recognise was the brown tumbling curls so much like my own.

I didn't know whether to hug her back or push her away. Surely, this was a little much for a first meeting? Clearly this wasn't where I got my emotional steadiness from. This was my mother Renee. I felt a little tug in my heart and frowned. She just seemed like she needed protecting, she was too small and dainty to survive a thing.

A man appeared in the doorway. My dad Charlie. He was a little taller than Renee but still smaller than me. I could see more of him and I committed it to memory. A simple blue button down over a grey t-shirt. Jeans and what looked like walking boots. In short, he looked exactly like what he was. Fork's police chief on a day off.

I felt my body relaxing. Charlie just simply looked stoic and serious. I was better handling that than Renee's hysterics. We were kindred souls.

I examined his face. No dandy pretty boy here, just a rugged sort of handsomeness that was just this side of good looking. His skin was tanned and a little weather beaten. His hair was brown like mine, but I couldn't really put that down to genetics. Lots of people's hair was brown. It was cut short, yet still managed to hang in shaggy bangs over his forehead. His eyes were brown and he had a little moustache. His mouth was firm but kind and it quirked suddenly.

"Renee get off her. You'll scare the poor girl."

Suddenly the pressure on my waist was released and Renee spun away to stand with Charlie.

"Sorry honey, I was just so excited to see you!" She was bouncing up and down like a child at its first birthday party and I couldn't deny her this.

So I smiled for her, even though inside it felt like my heart was breaking. Why had they given me up for adoption? If they hadn't Sarah and Mark would never have adopted me. I would never have been dragged into the world of the supernatural, a world of darkness and evil.


	2. Chapter 2

"_So I smiled for her, even though inside it felt like my heart was breaking. Why had they given me up for adoption? If they hadn't Sarah and Mark would never have touched me. I would never have been dragged into the world of the supernatural, a world of darkness and evil."_

_*_

(**A/N I'm not sure if nineteen year olds actually still go to school in America, but I'm manipulating this for my own purposes mwahaha)**

BPOV

I felt a little awkward standing there facing my parents. Wasn't there supposed to be some sort of bond that immediately snapped into place or something?

I took the opportunity to study my mother. Her features looked familiar, almost an exact echo of my own. Her cheekbones were less defined and she was more tanned than me, but I couldn't deny we looked alike.

Her hair wasn't as long as mine, cut to her shoulders. The unruly brown curls were the same though. Her eyes were a bright blue, standing out against her creamy skin. They looked soft and kind. She was wearing a lemon yellow sundress that hung just above her knees.

We stood there for a couple of seconds, all unsure of what to say or do.

"Hi Bella."

Charlie's voice was steady and didn't really betray much emotion. I avoided looking in his eyes, afraid of what I would see there. I knew how Renee felt about my return but I couldn't help wondering what he thought.

"Now you've had your baptism of fire," he rolled his eyes affectionately at Renee who had the grace to look a little embarrassed, "do you want to come in?"

"Sure." My voice was a little weak and hesitant. I had always hated how my emotions showed in my voice. I thought I'd trained myself out of it; I'd had to when I was living with Sarah and Mark. The comparison between my adoptive parents and my real ones was almost laughable. Or at least it would've been if even thinking of them didn't send shivers down my spine.

I mentally shook myself. I refused to let them intrude and poison this moment for me.

I followed Charlie and Renee inside. I couldn't help examining the hall, even if it was a bit rude.

The walls were painted a non-descript cream, nothing too bright or bold. It had a nice atmosphere, sort of calming. A few pictures hung on the walls and I stopped to examine one of them.

My heart skipped a beat as Renee suddenly popped up beside me.

"You like that one?" Her smile was almost blinding. I blinked a few times. I wasn't used to smiles.

"Yeah." I thought I should try to make conversation at least. "Where did you buy it?"

"I painted it myself. I might show you my studio later, you'll like it. I used to take you in there a lot when you were young…"

It seemed she was going to say more but Charlie appeared in the doorway to another room.

"Renee, leave the stories for later." He smiled at me. I was glad of the interruption to be honest. I couldn't really handle Renee's enthusiasm at the moment, I was still adjusting to the fact that I was really here.

I followed her towards the doorway, not noticing the small table in my way.

"Ouch." I bumped my hip into it and dodged away. Seemed like my natural clumsiness was returning too.

I followed Renee into the room, rubbing away at my hip and grumbling. I stopped in the doorway and looked about the room. It was painted yellow, a shade brighter than Renee's dress. Counters ran the length of one wall, a small fridge freezer combo beyond those. There was a small wicker table at the far end, beneath a window.

Whilst I would've liked to wander over and look out I realised this would be a little rude. This wasn't my house after all. Normal social rules didn't apply in this situation, but I wasn't sure how far I could go beyond the usual guest role. I didn't want to annoy them by strolling around like I owned the place.

"Coffee Bella?"

Charlie's voice. I turned back to find him looking at me over his shoulder, one eyebrow raised slightly in question. Renee was hovering close by, watching me with a half smile on her face.

"Yeah thanks."

I sat down at the table and watched my parents move about, their personalities obvious in their movements. Charlie's were smooth and steady, whereas Renee flitted about like a butterfly.

"Are you going to go to school in Forks honey?" She asked.

"Yeah I guess so. I didn't really want to be driving out to another town every morning. I'm just not a morning person; that would be hell on earth."

I was more than a little nervous about going to school here. Did the kids know I'd been given up for adoption? It wouldn't matter anyway, nothing they could say I hadn't heard before.

The next few hours passed in a blur. Renee was bombarding me with questions and information and by the end, I felt both physically and mentally exhausted. My mother sure was a chatterbox. I was also a little glad of that though, it reduced the awkwardness. I told her a little about my life in the home, though of course I left out the bad parts. I most definitely did not tell her about Sarah and Mark. I told her about my ambition to become a doctor, and she told me about her paintings.

It was just so normal and everyday that it was a little strange to me. After living in a house with my adoptive parents, being in a "normal" situation like this was a little overwhelming.

"Renee, it's time for Bella to go. You've exhausted the poor girl." Charlie's voice interrupted my tired musing and I smiled at him gratefully.

Renee bounced up from her chair and hugged me around the waist again.

"Oh Bella dear, I hope we see you soon!"

"Yeah Renee, sure." I injected as much enthusiasm into my statement as I could. I had a right to feel a little angry with them right? I mean they'd dropped me into that whole mess. Although I couldn't help but feel a little guilty for blaming them for something beyond their control.

I left the house with mixed feelings. It was drizzling now, the slow kind that soaks you to the bone. I flipped up my hood and jumped gratefully into my truck, whacking the heater up.

For a first meeting I thought that had gone pretty well. I hadn't flipped out or anything. I'd always been worried that years living with Sarah and Mark would screw me up mentally, but apparently I was still pretty much fine.

My stomach grumbled and I started my truck, quickly reversing out of the drive. I was staying at the only hotel in town, all paid for by Charlie and Renee. Whilst I felt a little bad for refusing the offer to stay at their house I knew, it was too soon to make that sort of leap. It was better to feel bad over making them pay for my hotel room than live in that house with two people I barely knew. They wouldn't understand about the nightmares and I didn't feel comfortable enough to tell them yet.

My stomach rumbled again and I sighed. I'd have to pop into the supermarket and buy myself a bag of chips or something. Dinner was hours away yet.

I flicked my blinker on and pulled smoothly into the car park. The rain was coming down harder now and the sky was filled with dark grey clouds. I jumped lightly out of my truck and groaned. I'd put my foot right into a puddle. I pulled my leg up and examined the hem of my jeans.

I heard the purring of another engine as a car pulled up behind me. I let go of my leg quickly and locked my truck, hoping they hadn't seen me acting weird.

I turned and looked at the car out of the corner of my eye. A silver Volvo. I frowned. That engine must be tuned, no Volvo I ever heard sounded like that.

I shrugged and began walking towards the bright welcoming light of the supermarket, but something stopped me dead in my tracks.

I watched helplessly as they emerged from the car. A huge hulking figure with dark curls and a tall slim muscular shape with blonde hair. I didn't observe any other details, I couldn't. It felt like my brain had shut down.

*FLASHBACK*

_I was lying on my stomach, reading a book on my bed when I heard the door open. I looked up, my stomach already twisting itself into knots._

_Sure enough, Mark stood in the doorway, a snarl already evident on his lips. My book fell from my lifeless fingers. My mouth opened and closed too fast, like a fish gasping for air._

"_Bella I can almost smell your fear."_

_I shrunk back against my headboard and barely held back a whimper. Sarah appeared behind him, holding a girl. I didn't look at her. It didn't help to remember their faces, to think of them as people._

"_Do you know what we are Bella?" Mark approached the bed as Sarah dragged the girl further into the room._

_I turned my head away. I didn't even want to think the word. I was crazy, they were insane, this whole situation was... I stiffened as he picked up one of my curls in his icy fingers. Suddenly his hand snaked around my neck, forcing me to look at Sarah and the victim._

"_Watch."_

_I watched helplessly as Sarah's head descended and she bit into the girl's neck. I watched the victim's eyes go wide and heard her screams echoing in my head as Sarah drained her dry._

_Dry sobs racked my body and Mark laughed._

"_Vampires Bella. We're vampires."_

_I shut my eyes but I couldn't block out his laughter and the gurgles from across the room._

"_If you ever tell anyone, we'll come for you. We'll come in the night Bella; you won't hear us until it's too late. And we'll drink you dry."_

*FLASHBACK OVER*

The two figures slammed their doors and stopped, looking at me. Their movements were too smooth and I was willing to bet if I touched them that their skin would be icy cold. There was only one word for these newcomers and I mentally shied away from it. My vision began to waver and I dropped to my knees helplessly.

Vampires.


	3. Chapter 3

**(A/n I did another version of this chapter where Bella did meet the Cullens. But I decided to let her "escape" this time mwahaha: P I don't own any of these characters, all of them belong to the great Stephanie Meyers)**

"_The two figures slammed their doors and stopped, looking at me. Their movements were too smooth and I was willing to bet if I touched them that their skin would be icy cold. There was only one word for these newcomers and I mentally shied away from it. My vision began to waver and I dropped to my knees helplessly._

_Vampires."_

I tried to suck in a breath but my lungs refused to cooperate. I pressed my hands onto the concrete, hoping the sharp pressure would help to focus my mind.

Vampires. In Forks? Not possible, surely?

"Are you okay?"

It was inevitable, like trying to delay the rising of the sun. I didn't want to look but I couldn't help it. My head rose slowly and I looked into the face of my death. If I hadn't been mortally afraid, I would have sighed. Oh but my death was beautiful, even by vampire standards.

His skin was paler than mine of course, and honey curls framed his face. I felt a jerk in my stomach and moved my hands to clutch it. What was this emotion towards a vampire? Lust?

My thoughts began to whirl as I stared into his amber eyes. His contacts were good, no hint of red visible.

A breeze blew from behind me and they suddenly turned black. I recognised the sign- this one wanted my blood.

I picked myself up of the ground and began to run. I knew it was futile, I knew I couldn't outrun a vampire, but fear drove my feet forward.

My heart was pounding so fast I could barely feel the spaces between the beats. My truck was getting closer but it didn't matter. A simple metal door wouldn't stop an immortal; they'd rip it off with ease. I'd be like a tasty snack waiting in a metal lunchbox.

I rummaged frantically in my pockets, finally pulling out my keys. My hands were shaking too badly to unlock the door. I nearly screamed in frustration. Somehow, I managed to fit the key in the lock and flung the door open.

Neither of them had followed me yet, I didn't stick around to wonder why I was being allowed to escape.

I started my truck and threw it quickly into reverse, screeching out of the lot. I risked a glance in my rear view mirror. They were still stood there, two figures fading fast into the distance.

I didn't know where I was driving; I just needed to put as much distance between them and me as possible.

Mark and Sarah couldn't have sent them, I didn't tell anybody. I kept my promise.

Unless they were just passing through, just hunting. I felt my stomach begin to unclench. Yes that was it, I convinced myself. They were just here by chance, nothing to do with you Bella.

One thought niggled at the back of my mind. What the hell had they been doing in a brightly lit supermarket parking lot? It wasn't the best place for hunting- too public. Even sick sadistic killers didn't relish the chance of getting caught.

Suddenly it hit me. I remembered now, a conversation between Mark and Sarah. They hadn't cared that I'd been listening.

*FLASHBACK*

"_Yes it's quite disgusting really." Mark's nose wrinkled in disgust. "Imagine it darling, living off animal blood."_

_Sarah looked thoughtful._

"_They say that their eyes are amber permanently. They don't have to wear contacts."_

"_But drinking from an animal? It's positively barbaric!"_

"_Yes, not to our tastes dear."_

_They turned and looked at me standing on the stairs. Mark smiled at me, that cruel smile that turned my stomach._

"_We've got another show for you tonight my dear. Your fear will feel so good."_

_I ran upstairs and slammed my door shut, sliding to the floor. They would bring another victim tonight._

*FLASHBACK OVER*

I pulled up at the side of the road and bowed my head, shivering with fear. Was that what those two were? Vegetarian vampires? Were they living in Forks, along with the humans?

It turned my stomach. It was like wolves living within a flock of sheep. One day there was bound to be a slip up and somebody would get drained.

It didn't matter; one of them had thirsted for my blood. That was enough to keep me far away from that supermarket for the rest of my time here.

I took a deep breath and started the truck up again. I pushed the memory of the attack into that portion of my mind that was reserved for my time with Mark and Sarah. I would not think of it again.

I pulled into the hotel car park and got out of my truck. I thought of Charlie and Renee. Were they safe in Forks with those _things_ here?

With my mind elsewhere, I smiled vacantly at the receptionist.

"Hello Mrs Franks."

"Hello Bella dear."

I'd only arrived in Forks yesterday, and somehow we were already on first name terms?! Mrs Franks reminded me of a hamster in a strange way. She was short and plump, with big rosy red cheeks and small beady eyes. Her white hair was wild, waving in all directions. She had a wire-rimmed pair of spectacles and had a habit of constantly pushing them up her nose.

I breezed past the reception desk and started up the stairs to my room. If either of those two… _vampires_ lost control it could be catastrophic. Of course, I wanted to think they were vegetarian, there was always the possibility that they had just happened to turn up in the car park. Perhaps they caught my scent while hunting and couldn't resist.

There were no guarantees that there were only "good" vamps in Forks.

I opened my room and put the chain on, it made me feel more secure.

Then I collapsed on the bed and let the terror have me. I curled myself into a ball and cried, shaking and rocking. I wrapped my arms around my chest where it felt like my heart would explode from fear.

Eventually the sobbing subsided and I fell into an exhausted sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

"_I opened my room and put the chain on, it made me feel more secure._

_Then I collapsed on the bed and let the terror have me. I curled myself into a ball and cried, shaking and rocking. I wrapped my arms around my chest where it felt like my heart would explode from fear._

_Eventually the sobbing subsided and I fell into an exhausted sleep."_

*

I woke up the next morning feeling less than refreshed and with a huge headache. I rolled over, grumbling, and checked the time on my alarm clock.

6:00am.

I groaned. Too early. Just five more minutes. I lay there for a while but my body refused to let me slip back into sweet sleep. I cursed and swung myself off the bed, still in my clothes from the night before.

I stumbled into the bathroom and stripped, getting into the shower always woke me up in the morning.

I tied my hair up with a bobble and stood under the hot spray, careful not to get my hair wet. It took hours for the heavy curls to dry properly.

I rubbed the sleep from my eyes and wrapped myself in a towel, pulling my suitcase out from the wardrobe. I'd been too tired and nervous to unpack yesterday, and this morning was no different.

Grumbling to myself, I picked out a pair of black skinny jeans, my favourite red shirt, accessorised with a black skull buckle belt and finished off with red sparkly flats.

I felt like Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz in these shoes, like I could click my heels and wish for anything.

I scowled at myself in the mirror as I pulled the bobble out and brushed my hair. If I could wish for anything, I'd put the clock back and get another four hours sleep.

I debated for five seconds whether to even bother going to school or not, but I knew Charlie and Renee would be disappointed in me if I skipped. Not like that was ever an option anyway- I didn't have the courage for it.

I stuffed a few things into my school bag, pens and notebooks, and slung it over my shoulder. I'd have a little drive around Forks before school and get to know the area.

When I'd arrived on Saturday, it was late and there was no thought in my mind other than getting to the hotel and crashing out. So I hadn't taken much notice of my surroundings.

Sally was my social worker; she'd been with me pretty much since I was born. She was the one I'd run to when I'd finally become free of Mark and Sarah. I told her I was old enough to want to meet my real parents and Mark and Sarah didn't approve. She'd contacted Charlie and Renee and they'd been happy to meet me. I guess she thought I was going back to my adoptive parents at some point, but she was wrong. I was going to stay in Forks. I wanted to move into my parents' house once I was comfortable enough to stay there. Mark and Sarah couldn't touch me now I was nineteen.

I was glad Mrs Franks wasn't at the desk to pelt me with questions. I was just so unbelievably cranky in the mornings it was untrue. I threw my bag into my truck and drove out of the lot. I managed to coax the old radio into life and tuned it to Fork's local station.

"It's a typical Fork's morning folks, with a beautiful cover of cloud. This song goes out to Beth Melody, enjoy. Vanessa Carlton, Thousand Miles."

I smiled. This one of my favourite songs to wake me up in the morning- not too heavy rock, but not too soft as to lull me to sleep again.

Making my way downtown  
Walking fast  
Faces passed  
And I'm home bound

Staring blankly ahead  
Just making my way  
Making my way  
Through the crowd

And I need you  
And I miss you  
And now I wonder....

If I could fall  
Into the sky  
Do you think time  
Would pass me by  
'Cause you know I'd walk  
A thousand miles  
If I could  
Just see you  
Tonight

I sang along, a little happier now as I drove down Fork's high street. It was pretty easy to find everything; it was almost unbelievable how small Fork's really was. Pretty much everything was off the main street.

I felt a shiver pass down my spine as I drove past the supermarket, but refused to think about the events of last night.

I finally pulled into the school lot, following the meagre dribble of cars heading in. My truck didn't look that out of place; most of the other cars were old too. I picked my bag up off the seat and bounced out of the driver's door, slinging it across my body.

I was humming under my breath until something stopped me in my tracks. Across the lot there was a silver Volvo.

Surely… not here… no, couldn't be.

I shook my head and laughed at myself. Lots of people had silver Volvo's after all. It was probably why the vamps decided to travel in one.

I turned and slammed my truck door. Suddenly all the hairs on the back of my neck stood on end and I spun around, my hand flying to my chest.

A human boy stood there, clearly shocked at my speedy turn.

"Hi, I'm Mike." He smiled at me, obviously trying to dazzle me with his pearly whites. I repressed the urge to roll my eyes and settled for a smile instead.

"God you surprised me there Mike. Hi I'm…"

"Isabella right?" He seemed pleased with himself for being the first person to talk to me.

"Yeah that's right." I didn't want to pull him up on the Isabella thing, though it really annoyed me.

"I guess everybody's already heard about me coming huh? And here was me wanting to make my big entrance."

He laughed at my lame joke.

"I'll walk you to the office if you want?"

I smiled at him, genuinely this time. He seemed like a nice enough guy, the friendly type.

"Sure, thanks, it's nice of you."

We started to walk across the lot and I looked up at the grey clouds covering the sky.

"Jeez, is it always like this?"

He followed my gaze and laughed.

"Yeah, pretty much. Sometimes it seems like Forks is the wettest place on the earth. You get used to it after a while."

"Yeah I guess."

We were silent for a little while and I ducked my head to avoid the stares of all the other students.

"Hey Mike, call me Bella yeah? Isabella sounds so old fashioned."

"Okay, yeah sure."

The rest of the conversation went along the safe topics of what kind of music we liked and by the time we reached the building containing the office, I felt much more relaxed about the day.

Mike followed me into the tiny room and I was glad of the wave of warmth that hit me. My eye wandered to the heater stood in the corner and all I wanted to do was stand in front of it. Possibly for hours, until I defrosted at least. I stepped up to the desk opposite. A woman was sat there with her head bent over some papers.

"Hello?"

She looked up and smiled at me. She was in her forties, with a blonde bob.

"Yes dear?"

"I'm Bella… I mean Isabella Swan. I'm new today?" My voice rose at the end of the sentence, making it sound like a question.

"Oh yes dear. I've got your timetable here, and a map." She spun away on her computer chair and rummaged in a drawer. I took the pieces of paper from her and tucked them in my pocket.

"And here's a slip, get it signed by all your teachers today and bring it back here at the end of the day." She handed me a small white slip of paper and I slipped into my pocket with the others.

"Thanks."

"Have a good day dear." She smiled at me and I returned the smile before turning back to Mike.

"Let's go Mike."

He turned and held the door open for me.

"Thanks."

I ducked underneath his arm and out into the bracing cold again.

"What have you got?"

I handed him the timetable, it seemed quicker than trying to decipher the different symbols on there.

"Oh biology." His face fell. "You're not in my class though."

He handed me the piece of paper and I shoved it in my pocket.

"Never mind, I'll walk you anyway."

The building was only a little walk away so I felt no need to make conversation. I was glad when we got back into the warmth though.

Mike turned down the first corridor and stopped outside a door.

"So I'll see you at lunch Bella?" Mike asked. He sounded a little eager, but maybe that was just me reading too much into it again.

"Yeah sure. See ya Mike."

I turned and pushed open the door of my classroom. I sucked in a breath in an attempt to calm the nerves that had erupted now Mike had left.

Even though I kept my gaze firmly fixed on the floor, I could feel the laser stares of the other students burning into my head.

I stopped at the teacher's desk, staring at his bald patch as it shone in the overhead florescent lights. He looked up and I smiled.

"Hi I'm Bella Swan." I dug in my pocket for a minute and handed him the slip. I towered over him as he was sat down in a chair and I took the opportunity to make a quick scan of the classroom.

I caught a glimpse of blond curls before a girl leaned over and blocked my view. I frowned and looked back to the teacher as he handed me my signed slip.

"There you go Miss Swan. There's an empty seat over there next to Mr Cullen. Here are your books."

He handed me a couple of textbooks and I concentrated on not stumbling as I walked down the aisle.

I smiled at the other students, hoping I looked friendly. I was going to do my best to make friends here.

The smile abruptly froze on my face and I got to my seat. For my partner was none other than the blond angel from the parking lot.


	5. Chapter 5

"_The smile abruptly froze on my face and I got to my seat. For my partner was none other than the blond angel from the parking lot."_

**(A/n Okay guys I need your input here. If anyone thinks I didn't handle the first meeting quite the way they wanted be sure to let me know and I'll try and change it a little. Personally I'm pretty happy with it, but of course I'm biased. Again I don't own any of the Twilight characters no matter how much I wish I owned Jasper. Enjoy)**

My brain just seemed to short-circuit and I stood there staring at him.

Vampires. In high school?! What the hell kind of freaky vamps were these?

The guy seemed just as shocked as I was. Probably didn't expect to see his midnight snack turning up again.

I felt the laughter bubble up and felt a little hysterical. They expected me to sit next to a vampire for an hour? What was I, some sort of sacrifice so he wouldn't munch his way through the entire class?

"Miss Swan, sit _down_ please."

The voice of the teacher made me automatically pull the chair out and plonk myself down. I shifted the chair to the opposite end of the table, as far away from him as possible.

Okay, think logically Bella. He must be vegetarian; otherwise he wouldn't be sitting in a room full of humans right now. Where did he get off going to high school though?! It must be torture for him. If anything, I might count him as more sadistic than Mark and Sarah.

I lifted my head cautiously and turned it towards him. I felt that sucker punch to my stomach again as I absorbed his unearthly beauty. God but he really was gorgeous…

Get a grip Bella. I whipped my head back to the front where the teacher stood.

I was sat in biology next to a vampire. I was ready for anything to happen next- maybe a unicorn would canter in through the door, or a dragon would crash through the windows- but nowhere in my mind did I expect what actually did happen.

"Hello Bella. I'm Jasper."

He was _talking_ to me now?! Did he want to be best buddies or something? Jeez, this vamp was weird! It was like the lion stopping and deciding to have a friendly chat with the gazelle.

Oh no, there was not a snowball's chance in hell I was getting any closer to him no matter how gorgeous he was. He could flip out at any moment and decide my blood was more important than my friendship.

His voice reminded me of Mark and Sarah too. The whisky smoothness of it confirmed what I already knew. Vampire.

*FLASHBACK*

"_Bella, there are some people here to see you."_

_I was sat in Sally's office, getting some chewing gum cut out of my hair. Stupid Alex Chester has stuck it there._

"_Hello there Bella dear."_

_The woman spoke first, a strawberry blonde. She was a pretty lady. Her voice was pretty too, like Christmas bells._

_A man stood next to her. He had black hair._

"_Bella, I'm Mark and this is Sarah. We've come to say hello."_

*FLASHBACK OVER*

"Hi."

I left it at that short reply, hoping to make my intentions clear. I would sit next to him for an hour, and then I was out of here.

I couldn't help but sneak another look at Jasper. I wasn't sure whether to continue with my previous labelling of "him", but it seemed a little rude- even to a vegetarian vamp.

He was just as gorgeous as I remembered him. There was no sun to play on those honey blond curls but I found myself fervently wishing there was. His amber eyes were beautiful- now I knew they were natural and there was no red hiding underneath. I swore I could see amusement swirling in their depths and moved on in my slightly pervy assessment. His nose was straight and perfect of course, no snub noses here. His skin was paler than mine, almost translucent, and I itched to reach out a hand and touch it. It would feel icy cold and smooth under my fingertips, like a marble statue.

It was his lips that I stared at the longest. They were slightly fuller than was usual for a human boy and a little paler since they had no blood pumping through them. I imagined touching them also, maybe leaning over and touching my lips to them…

A loud bang from the front of the classroom jerked me from my Jasper-induced pervy coma and I felt the beginnings of a huge blush rise up my face. Had the teacher noticed me staring?

Luckily, he'd simply slapped a book down on the table and was now flicking through it.

"Page 37 please."

There were the usual rustles and whispers as the class obeyed.

I watched Jasper turn the page in his own book as I automatically changed mine. His hands were long and lean, not broad like Charlie's. I snapped my head to the front before I could embarrass myself further.

The teacher continued to drone on for a while but I wasn't paying attention. Whilst every nerve in my body was reacting to the danger next to me, my mind wandered. Jasper was so beautiful, even by vampire standards, he had me pretty much mesmerised. My eyes seemed to stick to him naturally.

I wondered if he had a power, and who the man mountain was. Did he come to school too?

I shook my head. Surely, he was too huge to come to school. If anything, he looked like a teacher rather than a student.

"Bella?" Jasper nudged me and my arm accidentally touched his hand. I gasped.

Ice cold skin, I was used to the temperature. But it only served to bring back horrific memories of Mark and Sarah. When they used to hold my neck, forcing me to watch them drain their victims dry. While Mark fed off my terror and sadness. Guilt too. I felt so bad for them, but I was much too scared to do anything. I shuffled further away from Jasper. I hadn't even realised I'd been moving closer since class started.

Surely I hadn't forgotten how dangerous he truly was?

"Miss Swan! Can you please stop daydreaming and give me the answer!"

I scanned the board quickly and made an educated guess as to the answer.

"Erm… propane?"

He frowned and I smiled triumphantly. Ha, didn't expect me to get that one did you Baldy?

He turned back to the board and I felt rather than saw Jasper lean towards me.

"Bella you really should pay attention. You can't guess right all the time." That whiskey smooth voice again, with a hint of a Southern accent. Instead of making me feel so afraid that I fainted, it kind of excited me a little. This proceeded to annoy the hell out of me. I was really going insane here. I liked a vampire? Not possible. If all my years with Mark and Sarah had taught me anything, it was that vampires were cruel and sadistic. It was their nature.

Whilst every fibre of me was dying to snap at Jasper that of course I wasn't paying attention because there was a freaking vampire sat next to me who could drain me of my blood any minute and go on a rampage through the school, I had to restrain myself.

I had a bone deep respect for killing machines that could rip my head off so easily it was laughable. Vegetarian or not.

"Yeah." That was the best I could manage.

I tried to pay attention to the teacher, per Jasper's instructions, but of course my mind was still elsewhere. I was absolutely terrified now I'd managed to get my stupid mind off his beauty, but I kept feeling these waves of calm wash over me.

I felt almost sleepy; I could actually feel my eyelids begin to droop.

I snapped to attention. That was something to do with Jasper for sure, I wasn't feeling remotely tired. He was messing with my emotions, just like that Benjamin used to do. He was… the word escaped me for a while. Something to do with empathy…

An empath- that was it. I didn't appreciate him messing with my emotions. Personally I couldn't see the point in it anywhere. Whilst he was a vegetarian vampire, he was nowhere close to human. I didn't dare attribute human emotions to him, like sympathy or concern. He probably just enjoyed playing with the humans.

"Stop messing with me Jasper." I hissed.

It came out more than a little snippy and I held my breath. What would he do?

I felt my eyes slide sideways to his face. He looked… amused and a little confused. Once I'd started looking at him of course, I couldn't stop. He was so beautiful it was actually almost painful.

If he was an empath, surely he must feel the lust rolling off me in waves right now. He didn't mention it but I blushed anyway. Oh god, he must have felt it when I was examining him before. Of course he was amused.

"I'm not messing with you." He held his hands up as if I meant he was poking me under the table or something.

"Don't you like me feeling terrified? It's a natural freaking response." I hissed back and his eyes became even more confused.

The bell rang then and covered his reply. I scooped up my books and half-sprinted towards the door.

Mike was waiting outside and I risked one more backwards glance. Jasper was still sat there, his amber eyes staring into mine.

I snapped my head around and engaged in random conversation with Mike. I was scared, both of Jasper and my response to him.

I couldn't possibly _like_ a vampire. Right?


	6. Chapter 6

"_Jasper was still sat there, his amber eyes staring into mine._

_I snapped my head around and engaged in random conversation with Mike. I was scared, both of Jasper and my response to him._

_I couldn't possibly like a vampire. Right?"_

**(A/n it was kind of weird writing in Edward's point of view but I hope it wasn't too confusing switching between what people were saying and what they were thinking. As always these characters belong to Stephanie Meyers. REVIEW please guys :D)**

The next few periods passed in a whirl. Pretty much everyone I met was friendly to me, although some were curious about my adopted parents. I fielded the questions with consummate ease. In any case, most of my brain space was taken up thinking about Jasper.

I followed Mike into the canteen, barely managing to follow his words. My stomach was twisted into knots and my legs felt like jelly.

Don't think about it Bella. You just went a little crazy in Biology right? Nothing to worry about. Forget about it.

I smiled vacantly at Mike and saw something spark in his eyes. Oh please sweet Jesus, please let him just be excited about food.

"You can sit at my table if you want Bella." He seemed a little shy and I felt sorry for him.

"Yeah sure. Be fun to meet everybody."

He then proceeded to launch into an explanation of the latest video game he'd bought and I found myself actually interested in the conversation. I liked video games and he'd named one I'd wanted to play for ages.

"No way Mike! I thought that it wasn't even available in the US yet?"

He seemed pleased that I understood what he was talking about.

"My uncle works for the games manufacturer in Japan. He brought it over when he visited last week. I'm not really meant to have it though."

"I bet the graphics are awesome right?"

We were still talking about it as we approached Mike's table. There were a couple of people sat there and I smiled at them.

"Guys this is Bella, you've heard about her right?"

One of the girls, the preppy cheerleader type, leaned towards the girl next to her and whispered.

"Yeah we've heard. She's adopted; apparently her parents didn't want to bring up such a fugly child."

I imagine she thought I couldn't hear her over the noise in the canteen.

"Sorry, do you have a problem with me being adopted?" I smiled sweetly to counteract the pure venom in my words. I'd learned that you had to establish yourself with these kinds of people or they'd walk all over you whenever they wanted.

"N...no." She looked a bit taken aback. I smirked. It was highly likely that no one had ever answered back to her before.

The rest of the table looked a bit sheepish and embarrassed. No doubt, they'd heard her too.

I took the empty chair next to Mike and smiled at the rest of the table to show I was friendly towards _them_.

"Hi guys, I'm Bella."

They all visibly relaxed once they realised I wasn't about to rip their heads off.

Mike piped up, introducing everybody.

"This is Angela." A sweet looking girl with a black ponytail and glasses waved at my shyly. Her big brown eyes looked soft and kind, like doe eyes.

"Tyler." Mike pointed at a big black guy, the footballer type. He reminded me a little of the man mountain, though of course not as huge and muscly.

"Yo." He held up a hand. I smiled at him.

"This is my girlfriend Jessica." He smiled at the blonde girl. She was the one the airhead had been whispering to. She smiled at me vacantly and sweetly at Mike. I guessed I had nothing to fear from her, she had blue eyes that looked kind of blank and stupid. As if she was currently thinking about shoes and that was it.

"Hi there."

"And this is Lauren, she's Jessica's cousin." Mike introduced the air head last, a little reluctantly. I guessed the group put up with her because she was related to Jessica.

I examined her the most carefully. She had strawberry blonde hair and the same blue eyes as Jessica. They held a cold and calculating look, as if she was sizing up my weaknesses.

I smiled at her, careful to keep my thoughts off my face. It was clear that I'd have to try and get along with her though the thought turned my stomach.

She popped a pink bubble and smirked at me.

"Hi-hi."

Oh my god, she thought that was _cute?!_ The most it did was make me feel disgusted. I turned to Angela and rolled my eyes. She smiled a little bit and I felt I'd found an ally in the group.

Jessica immediately jumped in with questions about my life before Forks and I answered pleasantly enough. Once everybody's curiosity had been satisfied I started to think about getting up and getting lunch.

I felt pretty proud of myself. I'd made some new friends. Though of course Lauren didn't count among them. Jessica straightened in her seat as the background canteen noise dimmed a little.

"Lauren, the Cullens just walked in." She whispered to her cousin as she popped another bubble.

I looked round, heart leaping. Sure enough, I found Jasper at the back of the group and my heart beat a whole lot faster.

I scowled to myself and observed the group's passage through the canteen.

There were five of them altogether. Apart from Jasper, there were two other guys, the man mountain and another tall slim one with bronze hair. Of course, he also looked like a male model but he wasn't as scary as the other guy. A slight smile touched his lips as if he'd heard my thoughts.

I moved on in my assessment. The man mountain was holding hands with an impossibly beautiful blonde female. She had the kind of figure that you usually saw on posters stuck in men's lockers room and it was obvious she knew it too.

The last figure was a small one, even shorter than Renee. I hadn't thought that was physically possible. She nearly vibrated with energy, like a happy pixie. That description fit her well; her black hair stuck out in spikes. She was talking to Jasper.

Jessica saw my interest and eagerly leaped in to explain.

"The tall one with blond curls, that's Jasper. He's a senior but totally into Lauren right now."

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. I'd feel sorry for Jasper if he actually sunk to the depths of sinking his teeth into that slimy waste of space.

I saw the bronze haired guy jerk his head up and stare towards our table. He looked surprised and confused.

"The one who just looked over here is Edward. He's in our year but out of our league. I wouldn't bother wasting your time Bella."

I smiled wryly. As if.

"The small one is Alice. She's a little bit… weird if you know what I mean. She's Jasper's sister."

Sister my ass. If she was close to Jasper, she must be his mate. I refused to examine the feelings of jealousy and anger that ripped through me.

"The huge one is Emmet and he's holding hands with Rosalie. They're both seniors too. They're together."

Edward was still looking over at our table and I lifted an eyebrow at him. What exactly was his problem? If he was a vegetarian, he should've gotten over the urge to rip my head off by now.

I turned back to look at Jessica.

No reason I shouldn't shatter these guys illusions by telling them the Cullen's were not related by blood in any way, shape, or form.

EPOV (five minutes earlier)

I was impossibly bored as I lightly sifted through the thoughts around me in Spanish.

Each of us had been through high school so many times we already knew everything. And since we had perfect vampire recall we had no need of any further teaching. In fact, I was willing to bet that I could teach this class with ease, I was fluent in Spanish.

A product of having an eternity of time on your hands.

There was the usual mix of mundane thoughts but for some reason all of the humans were excited about the arrival of a new girl.

I rolled my eyes. It wasn't that exciting surely? She'd just be like all the other humans, such unoriginal thoughts.

The bell rang and I slowly gathered my books at human speed. Emmet stood up next to me and smiled, making his dimples pop up.

_I'm going to see Rose now._

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes again. Mostly Emmett's thoughts consisted of Rose. My brother was almost impossibly simple. It was kind of restful listening to him, knowing exactly what I would hear.

"Just keep any images out of your head please Em."

He chuckled and of course started thinking about what he'd done last night.

"Not funny Em." I groaned and tried not to listen to the vulgar thoughts anymore.

The rest of the family joined as we made our way to the canteen. Usually I tried to keep out of their heads as much as possible, out of courtesy, but often I couldn't help it.

Alice was thinking about going on another shopping trip of course. I groaned and hoped I wouldn't be roped into going along.

Rose was thinking about tuning her M3 again when we got home and I quickly switched to Jasper.

_She couldn't know right? Of course, she couldn't. But what she said…_

I saw the memory he was reliving in his head.

_He was sat in Biology with a girl sat next to him. Long brown curls, pale skin for a human, soft brown eyes… She was beautiful._

I almost hissed. It was the same girl I'd seen in his memory of the parking lot, the one that had ran away. And Jasper thought she was beautiful?! He didn't know what he was messing with here. She was a human!

_She was feeling absolute abject terror. He sent out calming waves to her and she visibly relaxed, before snapping up again._

"_Stop messing with me Jasper." She hissed. She slid him a sideways look and he felt the lust rolling off her in waves. She blushed. She looked so cute when she did that. He held his hands up._

"_I'm not messing with you."_

"_Don't you like me feeling terrified? It's a natural freaking response." She hissed back._

_The bell rang then and she scooped up her books and ran towards to the door at paltry human speed._

_That human boy, Mike, was waiting at the door. She looked over her shoulder at Jasper and he felt terror and lust again before she turned away._

I stared at Jasper.

"She _knows_?"

He looked at me sheepishly while everyone looked confused.

_Sounds like it to me._

I hissed.

"Do you know what this means? Did you tell her?"

He looked shocked.

_Of course I didn't! She just seemed to… know. I didn't speak two words to her before that, apart from in the parking lot. And she seemed to know even then. God, she was beautiful though. Even when she was scared out of her mind…_

If anything, this made me more annoyed.

"Jasper she's human." We were speaking at vampire speed, so I was comfortable that none of the humans could hear us.

_Talk about it later, the others are getting suspicious._

I nodded my head and noticed when he blocked his thoughts from me. I didn't listen to the confused and curious thoughts of the rest of my family as we walked down to the canteen; I was concentrating on listening for one unfamiliar voice.

I frowned as we entered the canteen, searching for it.

I found Mike Newton's voice easily, I knew it well.

_She's pretty hot. If I wasn't dating Jessica, I'd ask her out. Why is she staring at the Cullens? Don't tell me she's in love with them too?_

His disgust was evident in the tone of his thoughts. I flipped through the thoughts of the other people at the table.

_She doesn't seem shy… I think I'm going to get along with her, she doesn't like Lauren either._

That voice was Angela. I didn't mind listening to her thoughts, they were kind and pure.

_Fugly little skank. How dare she answer back to me? I'll get her back for that…_

That was Lauren, the human girl who fancied herself in love with Jasper. I smirked to myself.

"The tall one with blond curls, that's Jasper. He's a senior but totally into Lauren right now."

It was one of the other girls speaking and I listened for Bella's thoughts but found nothing. Not a thing.

I jerked my head up in shock, confused. One of the other girls spoke.

"The one who just looked over here is Edward. He's in our year but out of our league. I wouldn't bother wasting your time Bella."

I listened to her thoughts.

_Edward is way out of your league girl. Stop staring at him!_

Bella was looking at me with a wry smile on her lips.

"The small one is Alice. She's a little bit… weird if you know what I mean. She's Jasper's sister."

_Ooh, Bella looks kind of pissed…._

Bella did look annoyed and kind of jealous. This was not good for us.

"The huge one is Emmet and he's holding hands with Rosalie. They're both seniors too. They're together."

Bella lifted her eyebrow at me and I was taken aback. She turned back to Jessica.

I looked away from the table in shock. Why couldn't I hear Bella's thoughts? I couldn't tell if she knew what we were or not.

I sat down next to Jasper and nudged him.

"I can't read her."

He looked shocked, but he was still blocking his thoughts.

"You need to talk to her, see how much she knows."

_Maybe after school?_

I nodded at him.

_You guys go ahead without me; I'll meet you back at the house. Tell Carlisle and Esme what's going on._

I nodded again and turned to the rest of the family who were looking suspicious.

"I'll tell you at home. There's a little problem with the new arrival."

I just hoped Jasper could control himself completely, her blood had smelled so good to him. Even in his memory it had made me shiver in sympathy.


	7. Chapter 7

"_I just hoped Jasper could control himself completely, her blood had smelled so good to him."_

**(A/n Okay guys, it's the big conversation scene soon. I was pretty nervous about screwing this part up, but I think I got a good balance beween Bella's two main opposing feelings- lust and terror. R&R people :D)**

BPOV

I walked into Trig feeling confused and mentally exhausted. It was obvious the Cullens were vampires- that much I knew for certain. But why had they chosen to be vegetarians? If I hadn't overheard Mark and Sarah's conversation I would've swore blind it wasn't even possible.

I collapsed into my seat next to Angela and smiled tiredly at her.

"Hey Bella. You look worn out."

I put my head on my arms and groaned.

"I feel worn out. Probably from going through twenty questions with Jessica at lunch."

She laughed.

"Yeah she can be like that sometimes don't worry about it. Soon enough something else will capture her attention."

I hoped so; she was beginning to get on my nerves with her endless prattling.

I wondered if the Cullens lived in town. What did they hunt- deer? Surely, someone would notice if the deer population was suddenly decimated. I shook my head. It was all too fantastical to consider, it felt like my brain was about to explode.

Unbidden, an image of Jasper rose up in my head. Beautiful but untouchable. I tried to shake it off, but I was only human after all. I wondered how many humans Jasper had drained before he'd turned to the veggie life and shuddered.

A thought suddenly occurred to me.

"Angela, Jessica never mentioned the Cullens parents."

"Oh yeah." She tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear. "Their dad Dr Cullen works at the hospital. I met him last year when I sprained my ankle."

Interested now I lifted my head up off the desk.

"What's he like?"

"Gorgeous of course, though much too old for me." She sighed and I laughed.

So their "dad" was a vampire too? But then how did he work at the hospital, with all that blood?

"And their mom, Mrs Cullen, apparently she can't have children." Angela looked like she truly felt sorry for her.

"So that's why they adopted the kids?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

"Yeah I guess so. She's beautiful too, of course."

"Of course, I wouldn't expect anything less."

She laughed.

"That family has got a seriously good gene pool going on. No wonder they all turned out like models."

Before I could indulge my curiosity further class started. I stumbled my way through the questions I was asked, my mind on something else entirely.

Trig was never my favourite subject at the best of times, but today I couldn't help watching the clock. I needed to get back to my hotel room and sort my head out. Everything I'd learned today was spinning round and round inside it and it was giving me a headache.

I snatched up my books as soon as the bell rang and practically sprinted to the door.

I stopped in the doorway and gave Angela a cheery wave, not wanting to be rude.

Unfortunately, I was stopped before I was even half way down the corridor by Mike suddenly appearing from nowhere.

"Hi Bella." He smiled at me.

"Hi Mike." I tried to speed up but he simply matched his pace to mine.

"So erm we were wondering if you wanted to come to La Push beach this weekend? The weather is going to be nice."

I screeched to a halt, letting Mike carry on a few steps. He walked back towards me.

"We?"

"Yeah." He looked a little sheepish. "All the gang are going, some of us surf you know?"

"Oh." I considered the pros and cons of this trip. It'd be nice getting to know everybody better and see a little more of Forks, but I didn't really want to endure any more of Jessica's incessant questioning.

I shrugged.

"Yeah what the hell, why not?"

Mike smiled at me and looked a little too enthusiastic for my liking.

"Great! So erm where you going tonight?"

I gave him a strange look. Where did he think I was going?

"Back home to crash out, I'm beat."

Hoping he'd get the hint I yawned daintily. Unfortunately he was either too thick or simply didn't care because he continued to follow me and engage in random conversation.

By the time I reached the lot everyone had already cleared out and gone home. Mike waved at me as he drove past and I resisted the urge to give him the finger.

At least until he'd driven round the corner anyway.

Feeling a little better, I rummaged in my pocket for my keys. As I tilted my body to fit my hand in my jeans pocket, they promptly fell out of my hoodie- straight into a muddy puddle.

I groaned.

"Oh great, just what I need." I looked up to the sky with a sarcastic smile. "Nice to know you're looking down on me big guy. Thanks a bunch."

As I reached down to gingerly fish them out, the back of my neck prickled. I stood up immediately and spun round, only to find the very face that had been haunting my thoughts all afternoon.

Jasper Cullen. What a way to top off the day, I thought sarcastically, convincing myself that I wasn't the least bit excited to see him.

I was struck again by his beauty and the urge to touch his icy skin. This would not be a good idea for either of us.

"Hi."

With the pleasantries over with I turned round and bent to my keys again. All I wanted to do was go back to my room. Was that too much to ask?

Apparently, it was because the next thing I knew Jasper's hand appeared in my vision and snatched my keys up.

"Hey!"

I straightened and put my hands on my hips, trying to brazen out my terror. I was stood in an abandoned car lot with a vampire. Even if he was vegetarian, it still scared the living crap out of me.

Jasper smiled at me and I felt every nerve in my body tingle. Terror, that's what that was.

_Yeah you keep telling yourself that._ A little voice sniggered in the back of my head.

I'd never seen him smile before and I couldn't help but smile back.

I'm smiling. At a vampire. In an empty car lot. Okay, I was officially insane.

I held my hand out.

"Can I have those back? I really need to get home."

He shook his head and I frowned.

"I need to talk to you Bella."

If I wasn't so terrified I was pretty sure I would've melted into a puddle right there on the tarmac. I'd forgotten how gorgeous his voice was. It sounded like honey and whiskey with a gravelly undertone. No, no lusty thoughts allowed Bella, he's am empath doofus.

I struggled to form a rational sentence.

"Well you can talk to me tomorrow can't you? So, my keys?"

I bobbled my head at him and stood there with my arm outstretched like an idiot. I must have looked like a human teapot.

He shook his head again and dropped them into his shirt pocket.

My stomach twisted as my attention was drawn, against my will I might add, to his perfect chest. The shirt only slightly outlined it and I felt annoyed. Stupid piece of cotton. Didn't it have anything better to do than hang around spoiling my view?

I gave myself a mental slap. Concentrate girl.

"Sorry darlin', we really need to talk."

Now he was just messing with my hormones on purpose. That little endearment, spoken in his soft Southern accent, made me want to do nothing more than jump on him.

Not a good idea Bella. Just get your damn keys back and get out of here before you do something you'll regret.

Vampire, vampire, vampire. Remember that. He wants to suck your blood, not your face.

"Well make it quick then, I want my keys back."

I was surprised that my voice came out normal as my throat felt tight. I couldn't help but be mesmerised by his beautiful amber eyes. I felt like they were staring through to my soul.

"If I'm wrong Bella then this won't make any sense to you."

Probably wouldn't make any sense anyway, my brain appeared to have short-circuited from lust and terror overload.

I still couldn't tear my gaze away from his.

"What do you know about us? My family?"

My heart damn near jumped out of my chest. I was pretty sure it must have cracked a couple of ribs down there.

"Your… family?"

My voice sounded croaky and I cleared my throat.

"Do you know what we are Bella?"

Ah the millon dollar question, although I wasn't sure how to answer. Would it be better to pretend innocence? Would he have to dispatch me if I admitted I knew his family were vampires? Is that why he'd waited for me after school, had he been sent to kill me?

My terror escalated to a level I hadn't felt since I'd left Mark and Sarah. Only this time I felt waves of calm wash over me, and my mouth seemed to move of its own accord.

"Yes Jasper I know what you are. You're a…"

I hesitated before taking a leap of faith.

"You're a vampire."

**(Does this count as a cliffy? Haha :D)**


	8. Chapter 8

"_Yes Jasper I know what you are. You're a…"_

_I hesitated before taking a leap of faith._

"_You're a vampire." _

**(A/n Okay I hope no one acted too OOC in the later Cullen discussion. I keep forgetting to put this so I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT :( enjoy guys)**

I took a deep breath and watched the emotions play across his perfect face, too fast for my human eyes to follow.

"How did you know?" If I had been hoping for some emotion to show in his voice, I was disappointed.

Strange. Even though I had already been sure of what he was, stupidly it still shocked me to hear it from the horse's mouth so to speak.

I was babbling now.

"It's obvious Jasper. The unearthly beauty, the pale ice cold skin, the movements that are just too graceful for any human…"

He cut me off with one word.

"How?"

The shortness of it scared me a little and I felt my eyes begin to fill with tears of panic.

"Just give me my keys Jasper; I'm not going to tell anyone."

I had to convince him of that, I wanted to make it out of here alive. My voice shook and I refused to let the tears fall.

"How did you know Bella?"

I shook my head in wordless refusal. I did not want to discuss my past with someone I hardly knew, even if he was about the only person in Forks who would believe me.

"My keys…"

I was getting desperate now; my tears were starting to blur my vision. I was so scared my heart was thumping like a birds.

"I need to tell my family some kind of explanation Bella. You could blow our cover."

He was a blurry figure now and I shook my head again.

"I wouldn't do that Jasper, who would believe me anyway? Please my keys…"

Vampire, vampire, vampire. The word echoed through my thoughts and I felt myself getting light headed.

"How did you know?" He sent me waves of calm again, which only served to annoy me. I had the right to be afraid!

I decided it was worth trading a tiny piece of information for my freedom. It was obvious he wasn't going to let me go until I told him.

"I lived with vampires for a while when I was younger, okay?"

I pleaded mentally, praying- please Jasper, just give me my keys.

"But you're still human Bella. You haven't been changed."

"I know that Jasper, I was worth more to them human. And alive."

Wasn't it enough? Hadn't I told him enough? I barely knew him, he couldn't demand any more from me!

"Alright Bella, calm down. I'll give you your keys darlin'."

He reached into his shirt pocket and I almost collapsed with relief when I felt the cool metal hit my palm.

A sob escaped me as I shoved the key into my door and wrenched it open.

"We'll have to talk about this when you've calmed down Bella, we need to know."

"Screw you Jasper!"

I was on automatic pilot as I slammed my truck into reverse and screeched out of the lot. It was almost an exact replay of our first meeting, although that time I wasn't crying.

I didn't even look in the rear view mirror this time.

I waited until I was in my hotel room before completely collapsing. I lay on the floor, curled into a ball and shuddering.

I could've died, how could I have been so stupid? He might be a vegetarian vampire but he was still dangerous.

Did I forget what I had already gone through with his kind?

Stupid, stupid Bella.

*FLASHBACK*

_I refused to look at the girl in the corner. She wasn't a person anymore, she was just a dried out corpse._

_I turned my back to her and stared out of my window. Sarah had already left the room, but Mark remained._

"_Did you enjoy our little show sweetheart?"_

_I whimpered quietly._

"_I enjoyed your fear Bella. It tasted so sweet. I could easily bite you now but that wouldn't do would it? How else would I get my fix of puny little human terror?"_

_I felt his cold fingers against my neck and started to cry._

"_That's it Bella. Give me what I need." He hissed._

*FLASHBACK OVER*

I lay there on the floor, like a pathetic child until my sobs finally died.

I wiped my eyes and slowly lifted myself onto the edge of the bed. I dropped my head into my hands and started to cry again.

No more. Please no more.

I stumbled into the bathroom and splashed cold water on my face, gripping either side of the sink with my hands and forcing myself to look in the mirror.

I looked terrible. My hair was stuck up everywhere where my tears had touched it, my eyes were red with crying, and my entire face looked flushed.

But my eyes were the worse. The brown was soft and watery. I simply looked broken.

I reached for my brush with trembling fingers and dragged it through my hair, yanking it when it snagged in knots.

Just a little longer Bella, just stay standing.

I reached for the toothpaste and drew it across my brush, holding it as best I could with my shaking hands. I brushed my teeth quickly, longing for the warmth and comfort of my bed.

Finally, I staggered over and slid under the duvet, wrapping it round my body in a protective cocoon.

My last thoughts were of Jasper, but they weren't pleasant ones.

EPOV

I felt a little on edge waiting for Jasper to arrive home. Well, we all did. I may have been wrapped up in my own thoughts but I still couldn't help hearing everyone else's.

_I hope he's alright_. That was Alice. Out of all of us, she was the closest to Jasper. Sometimes I wondered why he hadn't become mates with her- they'd been together for such a long time. But I supposed it was for the same reason I hadn't either. There was just no spark there.

I lifted my head from the piano and gave her a drawn smile. Alice was often an enigma. Sometimes she was just as childlike as Emmet, but she could be wise and serious when the situation called for it. I knew she was worried for Jasper, and didn't want him to do anything that would cause him any pain. This included accidentally killing the girl.

I stiffened as I heard Jasper's thoughts break in to my mental musings.

_She cried. I made her cry._

"He's here."

In a whirl of movement we gathered round the table, ready to offer support if needed. Jasper often kept himself closed of from us, but he was still as much a part of this family as any of us.

Carlisle looked composed as always, although there was a touch of tension around his eyes.

Esme simply looked worried. I smiled at her. She was such a mother.

Rosalie looked angry and drawn. She was worried about the outcome if the human did know our true identities. She really didn't want to move again.

Emmet was the only one looking unconcerned. He seemed to think this was all a big game- see what the puny human knows.

Jasper entered the room calmly, although his eyes looked a little wild. I felt my body tense in reaction to his thoughts.

_She knows Edward._

Carlisle looked at me, wondering what the reason was for my involuntary hiss.

I looked at my family sat around the table and wondered what this meant for us.

"She knows." I addressed this statement to Carlisle, but the whole family reacted. Esme looked at Jasper, concern written on her beautiful face. Alice did the same. Carlisle simply looked curious, no doubt wanting the whole story.

Rose exploded in anger.

"What?! She knows?" She snapped her head towards Carlisle. "I do not want to move again!"

Carlisle inclined his head and showed no sign of her anger affecting him otherwise.

"It may not come to that Rosalie. Let Jasper continue."

Alice ran to him, drawing our eyes.

"Jasper, what happened?"

I watched him carefully, observing. He was carefully blocking his thoughts, so I could only go by what his face told me. It would not be much, Jasper rarely showed emotion.

"I caught her in the parking lot after school. She dropped her keys in a puddle."

Emmet sniggered and Rosalie slapped him in the back of the head.

"Ow Rose!"

Jasper gave him a quiet look that silenced his grumblings and continued.

"I picked them up for her and kept them. I asked her if she knew what we were, but she wouldn't answer me. She kept asking me to return her keys. I refused of course. I couldn't let her leave until I got an answer."

Carlisle nodded.

"She grew more and more hysterical, refusing to answer me."

"Get on with it Jasper." Rosalie snapped, getting impatient. Jasper gave no sign she had even spoken.

His amber eyes seemed to carry a far away look, like his mind was somewhere else entirely. Although perhaps I was being whimsical. Jasper was not prone to flights of fancy.

"Finally she admitted that she knew we were vampires."

There was complete silence in the room until Carlisle spoke.

"Did you ask her how she knew Jasper?"

"Of course. She said she'd lived with vampires when she was younger. She promised she wouldn't tell anybody. Who would believe her? I pushed her for a further explanation. All she would say is that she was worth more to them as an alive human. Her panic had become all consuming by this point. It was…"

He paused. I saw a wisp of emotion flit across his face. It looked almost like pain.

"Difficult to experience, even second hand. I was surprised she hadn't fainted right there in the lot. I had no choice but to hand her keys over."

Rosalie screeched in opposition to this decision.

"You did what?! So you didn't find out how she knew at all!"

Jasper looked at her.

"She cried. I made her cry."

Then I saw the true extent of what the exchange had cost him. His face took on a look I could only describe as haunted. The pain and regret in his eyes was overwhelming.

He left the room running- Alice following closely behind.

I turned to Carlisle.

"What can we do Carlisle? Clearly talking about her past distresses her, but we have no option here."

He nodded.

"I think we have no other choice. We need to talk to Bella Swan, all of us, face to face."

I absorbed the meaning behind his words.

"You mean…"

"Yes Edward. She will have to come here."


	9. Chapter 9

"_I think we have no other choice. We need to talk to Bella Swan, all of us, face to face."_

_I absorbed the meaning behind his words._

"_You mean…"_

"_Yes Edward. She will have to come here."_

**(A/n I hope it didn't seem like Bella gave in too easily to Jasper's request. And I hope I wrote the first touch moment well :D I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT :( p.s. huge thanks to JK5959 for bringing my stupid little mistake to attention before anyone else noticed :P and no I'm not going to tell the rest of you what it was, I prefer to keep my perfect clean record as per mistakes haha. Enjoy guys :D)  
**

BPOV

I woke up feeling like death warmed over. I pressed my fingers into my eyes and watched the fireworks dance behind my eyelids.

Stupid Jasper Cullen. Stupid, inconsiderate…

There was a thought niggling at the back of my mind but I ignored it. I refused to feel sorry for the Cullens; I was enjoying my righteous anger.

It was entirely their fault that my last two nights had been dogged with dreams of Mark and Sarah. I hadn't had those for a couple of weeks now. I supposed the past always caught up with you in the end.

I flung on a pair of dark purple skinny jeans and a white t-shirt with some random band logo on. I really felt like just spray painting _VAMPIRES SUCK _all over Forks but that was really out of the question. Not to mention pathetically obvious.

I scowled at my reflection. Now I was insulting myself? I sighed. Another day another drama.

I seriously considered skipping but in the end, I just didn't have the bottle. Mrs Franks would no doubt be knocking on my door if I didn't leave for school soon.

I was mentally kicking Jasper's ass all the way through my usual morning routine. Of course, in reality I would just break myself. Damn vampire supreme strength. He wouldn't even have to do anything; just his body was hard enough to break my hand.

_Mmmm I wouldn't mind breaking my hand to get a view of Jasper's body…_

I scowled again. That voice in the back of my head was really beginning to get on my nerves.

I wondered if he would try and catch me after school again. Now I'd calmed down a little I did realise that I'd overreacted in the car lot yesterday. Panic was an automatic response for me when I was around vampires. After all I'd been through what did he expect from me? We were never going to be best buddies.

_Yeah but he doesn't know what you went through. You're really blaming him for something that wasn't his fault._

"Ugh shut up!"

I flung my brush down on the counter and stormed out of the bathroom.

I slammed out of the hotel before the voice could pop up again and remind me of something else I'd done wrong.

Although I couldn't help considering it as I drove to school. Maybe I had been a little harsh on Jasper. Hell, not to mention I'd just lumped the rest of the Cullen's in with him. He'd never given me any sign that he wanted to harm me.

He was not Mark or Sarah. But what was I meant to do? March up to him and apologise? _Hey Jasper sorry for totally freaking out in the lot yesterday and telling you to get screwed?_

No, not going to happen any time soon. So the best I could do was prepare mentally in case he decided he needed some more information from me.

I couldn't help the little ripple of excitement that flew through me at the thought of seeing him again.

I scanned the lot for the silver Volvo I assumed his family travelled in. I was curious about them. No vampires I'd ever met had made true family bonds. Even a coven was more of a tentative group that could split up at the slightest provocation. Maybe it was the animal blood that made the difference…

I pulled into a space and snatched my bag from the opposite seat, lightly jumping down from the cab.

I craned my neck to see across the crowd of people milling about.

_Move your stupid asses! I can't see Jasper!_

"Looking for someone Bella?"

A little shriek escaped me as I turned round.

Of course, it was Jasper stood there; he was the only person around here with a voice that could easily melt me into a puddle.

_Right Bella, remember what you told yourself. It's just Jasper. Don't panic._

By some miracle of nature, I managed not to liquefy onto the tarmac.

"Hi Jasper."

Phew, I managed a normal greeting. Although all brain processes were suspended when I was caught by his amber eyes.

"I thought you would be less likely to freak out when there were people around."

I would've looked down at the floor in embarrassment if I could have torn myself away from staring at him.

"Erm yeah… sorry about that yesterday. I know I overreacted a little but I have my reasons Jasper."

An actual sentence! And it made sense! I marvelled at my ability to sound normal when I wanted to jump somebody in a crowded school car lot.

"No apology needed, I know I pushed you too far. I could see you were distressed by the whole thing."

A little flicker of something haunted his beautiful eyes. Regret?

As soon as I saw that, I made my decision. No more running away and crying- I had to face my problems head on.

"So I guess you still want to know the answer to your question yesterday?"

He looked surprised. Probably wondered why I was actually _volunteering_ information.

"I'm not usually that difficult Jasper. You just seem to bring out the best in me."

It was the first time I'd heard Jasper's laugh and it was… beautiful was too plain a word. I was quite sure the word to describe it hadn't even been invented yet. It made my whole body tingle and want things it clearly shouldn't.

"Well I guess you could say that Bella. I wasn't sure of how you were going to react to this, but I seem to have caught you in a good mood. So now's a good a time as ever."

As I stood there admiring him I was pretty sure I would've given him anything he asked for.

"Plus you can't 'freak out," he made air quotations with his gorgeous hands, "when you're surrounded by people."

I was getting a little worried now. What on earth was he going to ask me that would make me freak out again?

"Nothing to worry about Bella honestly."

Damn I'd forgotten he was an empath. Imagine the waves of lust rolling off me this morning!

I blushed and felt like whacking myself in the head with my Biology books. I'd forgotten he could read every emotion I was feeling.

"Embarrassed?" He sounded adorably confused and I couldn't refuse him anything.

"You were saying Jasper?" I tried to distract him from the subject of my current emotional state and he gave me a look as if to say _I haven't forgotten this_.

"Yeah. The rest of the family want to meet you Bella. Just put yourself in our shoes for a minute please. We need answers; you could be the reason we have to move again. And Rose would not be happy with that."

It sounded like he was trying to get his explanation out before I panicked and ran away screaming, but my feet were firmly rooted to the tarmac.

Meet his family? As in, he wanted me to stroll into a house containing no less than _seven_ vampires? Was he clinically insane?

I took a minute to breathe and calm myself down. I reminded myself of my vow not five minutes ago.

_Meet your problems head on Bella? Not your style. _That little voice sneered in the back of my head.

I lifted my head and stared at Jasper. He truly didn't understand why this was so hard for me.

This wasn't his fault. If it was my family who were vampires and someone else was the random human girl who happened to know their secret, wouldn't I want to know too?

Sure, but that didn't mean I wasn't terrified of setting a single foot in Jasper's house.

"You're speechless Bella?" Jasper sounded a little amused and concerned. I shifted from foot to foot.

"Not exactly. Just thinking."

"What are you thinking darlin'?"

Later I would convince myself that it was that soft endearment that undid me. Spoken in Jasper's whisky smooth voice it broke through my defences like a battering ram.

"Where I lived before Jasper, they didn't treat me so well. So it's understandable if I'm a little wary of going to your house right? I mean Mark and Sarah showed my things I never want to see again as long as I live- things I wasn't meant to see. I'm scared Jasper. I'm scared of what could happen if one of you forgot that you were different. I'm scared of what you could do."

I stared into his eyes, pleading with him to understand.

"They hurt you?" He sounded angry now, his voice a little rougher.

I shook my head. It sounded like he cared, but I wouldn't allow myself to go down that route of thinking.

"Not exactly. Not physically anyways."

"You don't have anything to worry about Bella darlin'. I wouldn't lay a finger on you if my life depended on it. And neither would any of my family. Probably because they know I'd rip it off."

He carried on before I could process that little nugget of information.

"So you don't have anything to be scared of."

He placed his hands either side of my face and the world stopped turning. Time seemed to stand still.

Jasper was touching me, and everything else faded away. His hands were ice cold of course and smooth.

I couldn't help but turn my cheek into his hand. I felt surprise stiffen his body and a blush rise to my cheeks.

He'd brought on the whole body tingle again, and I swore my face was burning underneath his freezing hands.

I clenched my hands into fists to stop myself reaching out and bunching them in his shirt. I couldn't pull him closer. I couldn't do anything but revel in his touch for however long he chose to give it.

"Bella?"

His voice sent a shiver through me, but it wasn't of fear. It sounded a little hoarse and strained, but I didn't dare to look up into his face for fear of what I would do.

"Bella look at me darlin'. Don't be afraid."

Afraid? The very idea of fear was laughable while he was touching me. I felt invincible.

Slowly I lifted my head, worrying my bottom lip with my teeth. Surely, he could feel what I was feeling? Surely, he could tell?

His amber eyes stared into mine. His face was so close… I could move my head just a little and touch his frigid lips with mine.

"I won't let anything happen to you Bella Swan. Not now, not ever. But I think you should go inside, people are staring and the first bell has already gone."

I fought an inner battle with myself. The urge to get to class before I was late and the urge to stay where his cool touch could send me into flames. The second one won, until he slowly dropped his hands.

I let out a breath I wasn't aware that I'd been holding.

"You better get to class Bella; I wouldn't want you to be late."

I stood there, holding my bag by my side. I couldn't force my legs to move. I wanted nothing more than to stay here with him. I wanted those hands on my skin again. I wanted to burn with him.

"Go Bella."

His voice carried the tone of authority now, and I felt my legs unfreeze and carry me across the tarmac towards the school building.

I wasn't unaware of the stares and shocked whispers from the other students gathered near the doors, I just simply didn't care.

Jasper had touched me, and the rest of the world has fallen away.

Now I knew what it felt like to have Jasper touch me, I wanted nothing more than for it to happen again.

**(A/n phewwww the longest chapter yet I think! :O but I was on a roll with this one guys :D thanks to everyone for the fantastic reviews, every one is special to me. Let me know what you think. Thanks again (*^_^*)**


	10. Chapter 10

_Jasper had touched me, and the rest of the world has fallen away._

_Now I knew what it felt like, I wanted nothing more than for it to happen again._

**(A/n I may be a little cruel later on to poor Bella mwahaha so prepare yourself :D enjoy guys)**

BPOV

I'd forgotten that Biology was my first class until I actually arrived at the classroom door.

Confused, I stopped. I wasn't actually sure how I'd got here- no conscious thought had been involved that was sure. It felt like I'd left my brain back outside with Jasper.

"Nice of you to join us Miss Swan. Are you going to sit down, or are you going to hover in the doorway all day?"

I scuttled to my desk ignoring the sniggers and collapsed into the chair. Jasper was in this class too. In fact, he sat right next to me.

But he wasn't here yet. I frowned. Was he skipping or something?

Maybe he was embarrassed. There was probably a hell of a whole lot of lust coming off me in the parking lot not five minutes ago. It was probably a wise decision for him not to attend class; I wouldn't get any work done with him sat next to me. Tempting me.

I replayed the memory of his touch over and over in my head, like a much loved movie. I wished that I had the right to touch him back. To fist my hands in his blond curls and pull his head to mine. To place little kisses along his jaw line and trace his face with my fingers. To touch my warm lips to his cold ones…

"MISS SWAN I HAVE CALLED YOUR NAME NO LESS THAN THREE TIMES! WHERE IS YOUR BRAIN TODAY?"

I jumped as the bellowing quickly drew me back to colourless reality.

"See me at the end of class Miss Swan."

I almost groaned out loud. A detention? I'd only been here for two days!

It was worth it though. I felt a smile spread out across my face. It was worth it to daydream about Jasper.

"Are you smirking at me Miss Swan? You're really trying my patience."

"No sir, sorry." I felt a blush rise up my face, unbidden. Damn I needed to try and keep my mind off Jasper Cullen and on the current class.

I worked diligently for the rest of the class- managing to successfully keep my mind on work by promising myself I could think about Jasper as much as I wanted later.

Even thinking his name brought a smile to my lips. But no, I shook my head, I had to work.

Work, work, work. I chanted it in my head to keep my concentration.

It was a blessed relief when the bell rang. That relief was short lived though, when I remembered that I was about to get a stiff talking to.

I dragged my feet as I walked up to Mr Banner's desk; letting the other students clear out before I got there.

"I shan't keep you for long Miss Swan; I know you have other classes to get to. Hopefully you'll concentrate more in them than you did in mine. I was not pleased with your conduct today and if you ever zone out in my class again I will quite happily give you a week's worth of detentions. Understood?" He looked at me, narrowing his eyes in an attempt to look scary.

"Yes sir." I nodded my head, eager to be out of the awkward situation.

"Good. Off you go then."

I barely stopped myself from skipping out of the classroom. I thought I was going to get detention for sure!

I wafted through the rest of the classes before dinner on Cloud Nine, walking round with a stupid goofy grin on my face.

I gave thanks to whatever God was up there that Jessica wasn't in any of my classes, although there was no way I wouldn't get a severe grilling at lunch. I groaned. Why did Jasper have to touch me in the parking lot where everyone could see me acting like a complete idiot? No doubt, we were the talk of the school by now. What on earth was I going to say to her?

I was a couple of steps from the canteen doors before I decided I couldn't do it. I could not walk in there knowing every single person was whispering about me. I could not endure an hour of incessant questions from Jessica.

I slipped out through the double doors and round the back of the school building. At this moment, I couldn't give a damn if she thought I was sneaking off to meet Jasper.

I sank into a heap by the wall and dropped my head onto my knees in embarrassment. I felt mortified. Why was I so stupid? That little display in the car park had surely sealed my fate. I might as well have written I LIKE JASPER CULLEN on my forehead in red marker pen.

Wait a minute, I LIKED Jasper Cullen? As in liked liked?

_Pretty dumb aren't you? _That little voice sneered at me again, but I couldn't help agreeing this time.

I fancied a vampire. Oh dear god, kill me now. Not just any vampire either, oh no, I had to go and pick an empath. A vampire who could feel my every emotion. Every hint of lust I sent out.

"What is wrong with me?" I groaned in frustration and lifted my head up, leaning it on the wall.

I banged it a couple of times, which only served to give me a pain in the head. I rubbed it a few times and sighed.

"Smart plan Bella. Real smart!"

I closed my eyes and screamed quietly, just a little in my throat.

"Bella?"

"Holy Jesus!" I must have jumped about ten feet in the air. It was Jasper. I stopped breathing for a second while his beauty hit me again. It was like taking a sucker punch to the stomach. I started to replay the events of the car lot in my mind, but stopped myself before I could get too hot and bothered.

"You're skipping lunch?"

Don't sit next to me Jasper. Do not sit down. I will not be held responsible for my actions if you sit next to me.

Of course he sat next to me and stretched his legs out next to mine. I felt his leg bump mine and felt a wave of lust so powerful I nearly choked on my words.

"Yeah… Jessica. Too many questions."

That was all I could get out. All of my concentration was taken up trying to wrestle my feelings into some semblance of control.

"Damn damn damn." I spoke under my breath, forgetting he could hear me. I even had my eyes pressed tightly shut- hoping it would help me to focus.

"Bella are you ok?"

"Oh yeah just peachy!"

The only excuse I have for what happened next was that my brain had melted from his close proximity.

"Just move your leg a little. It's breaking my concentration."

There was a shocked silence for a couple of seconds.

I was silent because I was absolutely mind bendingly mortified. I had never been so embarrassed in all my life.

I brought my knees up to my chest and hid my head on top of them.

"Oh my god. Oh my god." It seemed that was all I was capable of saying.

Jasper sounded amused and a little… pleased?

"My leg distracts you?"

I figured I might as well go the whole hog. In for a penny in for a pound so to speak.

"It's not your leg itself. It's just what happens when you touch me. I'm sure it's some kind of weird response personal to me. Don't worry about it Jasper, it's not your fault my thoughts scramble when you're close… I'm sure there's some explanation. Maybe I was abducted my aliens and they removed my brain…"

I caught my breath as I felt his hand take a curl and tuck it behind my ear.

"Silly Bella."

I couldn't find my tongue to speak. All that emerged were some kind of intelligible gurgles.

I felt his cool breath on my ear and shivered.

"I like you too."

The world stopped spinning again as his hand slipped under my chin and gently lifted my head up.

I have no idea what showed in my eyes but evidently, what he saw there pleased him, because he smiled.

I could feel my body shaking and tingling. I was burning from the inside out.

"Oh."

My brain was fried. Jasper _liked_ me? ME? Surely I'd misheard or something? Of all of the people in the world he could pick, it wouldn't be me right?

"Bella darlin'?"

He was probably expecting some response, but as his thumb had moved to my lips, I wasn't capable of human speech.

"Uh…"

I was trying, I really was.

"Can't think. Brain fried."

He smiled again and if my heart hadn't already been going full pelt it would have speeded up.

"I was counting on that."

I felt my eyes widen as he started to lean closer. Was he going to kiss me?

My mind was whirling in a thousand different directions, trying to process this new information.

I was begging time to hurry up; I wanted to feel those frigid lips on mine.

Staring into those amber eyes, I felt as if a vice had wrapped around my heart and started to squeeze. I wanted him to kiss me so badly; I wanted it more than breathing. I wouldn't care if I never took another breath again.

"Jasper?"

A new voice intruded on our private moment but I couldn't move my head to see who it was.

Jasper did though, breaking our eye contact.

"Alice?" He sounded breathless and a small part of me was pleased that he was as affected as I was.

The other 99.9% was pretty sure that the arrival of Jasper's mate just as he was about to kiss me would be the last thing that ever happened to me.

I was about to die. She'd rip me apart. And I'd die not knowing how Jasper tasted, that was the worst of it.


	11. Chapter 11

"_The other 99.9% was pretty sure that the arrival of Jasper's mate just as he was about to kiss me would be the last thing that ever happened to me._

_I was about to die. She'd rip me apart. And I'd die not knowing how Jasper tasted, that was the worst of it."_

**(A/n of course we all know what is going on with Jasper and Alice, but I'm letting Bella labour under her misunderstanding :P)**

BPOV

Oh sweet Jesus. I wasn't sure whether to face my death head on or act like the coward I was and keep my back turned.

"I wondered why you were taking so long."

She sounded… amused? She had a right. If our positions had been reversed and I was the gorgeous vampire I'd probably think it was funny that a plain little human had got ideas way above her station.

Jasper seemed to waver for a minute before standing up.

I, of course, couldn't move from my place on the ground. Fear had frozen me into place. There was a hint of anger and guilt starting to rise in me too. How could I have forgotten that Jasper had a mate?

Such a stupid stupid thing to too. Classic Bella. I'd allowed the sweet torture of his touch to drive all other thoughts from my mind.

"I'll see you at home later Jazz. Just to let you know Bella, I support this wholeheartedly."

I could hear a smile in her voice, which confused me completely.

"Jasper?" My voice was hoarse. I saw his beautiful head come back into view as he crouched next to me.

"I thought I told you not to be afraid of my family Bella. They wouldn't hurt you."

"How can Alice support this?"

He frowned.

"I don't understand darlin'."

I was getting a bit annoyed at him now. He'd let me carry on like the lovesick teenager that I was, allowed me to let myself be ruled by my hormones. Not once had he reminded me of Alice. Maybe he wasn't the person I thought he was.

But that was unfair. This was partly my fault too. I'd forgotten about Alice completely.

I was struggling to put this into words, busy marvelling that I was still alive.

"You're telling me that as your mate she's not the teensiest bit annoyed that you just nearly kissed me?"

The complete and utter shock on his face threw me completely.

"My mate?"

Comprehension dawned on his beautiful face like a sunrise.

"Aah I see. That's why you felt angry and guilty."

His hand slipped under my chin again and I couldn't turn my head away from his touch. Not for Alice, not for anyone. I couldn't deny myself this.

He tilted my head until I was looking into his eyes again. And I found myself lost in the amber depths, filled as they were with tenderness.

"Alice is not my mate Bella."

My jaw would probably have dropped if his hand hadn't already been underneath it.

"We've been together a long time, but nothing like that has ever happened between us. Ever."

"Oh."

That stupid little word again. Why was I always bouncing from one embarrassing situation to the next?

Jasper must have felt my embarrassment because he smiled at me, causing my heart rate to rocket again.

"It was a logical conclusion Bella, when you saw how close we were."

The fact that he was justifying my dumb assumption melted my heart and gave me the courage I needed.

I brushed my knuckle along his jaw, unable to help myself. I was shocked as he made a noise deep in his throat that sounded almost like a purr. I opened my hand and he turned his cheek into it, just like I had back in the car lot. His eyes fluttered shut.

The small movement made my heart twist with an emotion I refused to name and I moved closer to him.

Danger was the last thing on my mind at this moment.

I moved my hand to brush back his curls and he opened his eyes again.

"Bella darlin'…"

His voice was hoarse. I had no words to speak, my throat felt constricted. He was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen.

The colours of the surrounding forest seemed to fade away and he was the only vibrant thing left in my vision.

I moved my hand again, reaching out with my thumb to trace his lips. They were cold of course, and my heart stopped for a second before kicking back into high gear.

"Bella…" He said my name with a sigh and it fluttered across my thumb like a caress. His hand came up and wound itself into my curls.

I needed no further invitation, my eyes flickered shut of their own accord and my hand dropped into my lap.

The first touch of his lips was tentative and soft, but it felt like I'd inserted my finger into the mains socket. The jolt of electricity was beyond anything I'd ever felt.

My hand snapped to the back of his head and fisted in his curls, tugging slightly as he pulled away even though I knew he would barely be able to feel it.

He reacted though and kissed me again, firmer this time. Our lips moved together in a dance as old as time and I held back a moan at the _rightness_ of it. It felt like I'd come home, like there was some missing piece of myself I'd never noticed until now.

Bold now, my tongue swiped across his bottom lip instinctively- asking for entrance.

He pulled away then, taking unsteady breaths he didn't need. I was no better.

"Bella we are not making out sitting on the floor behind school. My ma would be spinning in her grave."

I pouted.

"Don't care."

He laughed.

"Don't be like that Bella." He leaned closer and my breath hitched. His amber eyes were almost glowing.

"It's not because I don't want to either. But lunch is almost over and pretty soon this place is going to be filled with curious humans. Now don't trample over my old Southern sentiments. We gentlemen have our limits, and if I kiss you again I'm pretty damn sure I won't care either."

Sure enough, I dimly heard the end of dinner bell shrilling in the background.

"Great, now I won't be able to concentrate in class at all."

I was pleased with my ability to be comfortable with him. It seemed our kiss had broken down all barriers between us. I'd worry about that later though.

He laughed and grabbed my hand, pulling me up with him.

"Me either, but I'll see you after school Bella darlin'."

I'd forgotten until he'd reminded me. I'd promised to go to his house and tell his family exactly how I knew so much about the vampire world.

I nodded and gulped in a cartoonish fashion. He smiled at me and squeezed my hand gently.

"Don't worry Bella, you'll like them."

"It's not that I'm worried about." I admitted. "What if they don't like me?"

Maybe that was a bit forward. After all, we'd just shared our first kiss. It wasn't like we were about to get married or anything. But as I looked down at our joined hands-, my pale warm one entwined with his paler cold one I couldn't help feeling that my life had just changed. And I just wasn't sure if it was entirely for the better.

"How could they not? Don't worry; I'll be there with you."

Words rose up in my throat but I gulped them down again. I was still unsure of myself.

"Thanks Jasper." I figured the shortened version of his name was only used by Alice, and I wasn't confident enough to use it yet.

He pulled me forward a little and dropped a gentle kiss onto the top of my head.

"I'll walk you to class ok?"

I nodded and we walked back into school, our hands by our own sides now. I missed the connection, but I understood the reason for it. I didn't particularly want to endure constant questioning either. What would I say anyway? What was the state of our relationship? We weren't technically going out were we?

These questions were shook from my brain as I saw Jessica running towards me, waving frantically.

"Oh sweet Jesus save me please." I groaned as I plastered on a fake smile and waved back. What on earth was I going to say?

**(A/n okay guys so how did I handle the FINAL first kiss? I don't think it happened too quickly but I'm a little biased again. Review please, I'm a little nervous about this chapter)**


	12. Chapter 12

**(A/n I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS although I do own Mark and Sarah. But jeez who wants to own the poison pair? :P I'd much rather own Jasper *sigh* Anyway, here's the latest installment guys. I tried to make it a bit longer this time around. All feedback welcome, even criticism :D enjoy (*^_^*)**

"_I saw Jessica running towards me, waving frantically._

_"Oh sweet Jesus save me please." I groaned as I plastered on a fake smile and waved back. What on earth was I going to say?"_

I tried to inconspicuously look for an escape but nothing immediately presented itself. Jasper had slipped away at some point and I couldn't see him anywhere on the packed corridor.

My heart began to thrum and I consciously concentrated on my breathing. What was the worst that could happen?

"Bella, oh my god!"

Jessica's voice was screechy and high with excitement.

"Hi Jessica." Mine was an exact contrast, flat and lacking emotion.

She of course ignored this.

"Soooo, give me the lowdown!" She clapped her hands together excitedly and the action reminded me of Renee.

I hadn't seen my parents since the day before yesterday and I felt a little guilty.

"Earth to Bella!" Jessica waved her hand in front of my face and I snapped back to the present.

"Sorry Jessica, guess I zoned out there for a second."

I gave her a weak smile.

_Please please don't ask me._

"So, Jasper Cullen huh?" Her eyes looked bright for the first time since I met her and I almost groaned out loud.

_She asked me._

"What do you mean?"

"Oh don't play that with me! Everyone saw you in the lot this morning." She frowned for a second or two. "Lauren isn't too happy you know. You did kind of steal her man."

I held back the urge to shout "SCREW LAUREN!" and did my best to look chastened.

"They weren't going out or anything though right?"

As soon as the words left my mouth I realised I had just made a huge tactical mistake. I had practically admitted that there was something going on between me and Jasper.

I wasn't ashamed of it, I was just unsure of what he would want me to say.

Jessica squealed excitedly.

"No, no. Oh my god, tell me everything! Have you kissed?"

I would have denied it, but my blush betrayed me.

"OH MY GOD!" I didn't think it was actually possible for anyone's voice to physically go that high and I cringed.

"It's not that big a deal Jessica."

She looked shocked.

"Of course it is! He's never even so much looked at a girl in this school!"

I felt a little smug to have my suspicions about Lauren confirmed. I knew that she'd blown everything all out of proportion.

I had a sudden burst of inspiration and smacked myself in the head, in the manner of someone who's forgotten an important appointment.

"Jessica I need to get to class. I'm already late!"

"Ohmygoshyou'reright!" The words came out as one as she looked at her watch.

"I'll catch you later Bella, you HAVE to tell me everything!"

I couldn't help but feel relieved as she dashed off up the corridor. There was no way she was catching me after school, I was going to Jasper's after all.

Feeling a little better, I rushed to English. I went through the rest of the day on automatic pilot, my mind on Jasper and his kiss. What did that kiss even mean? I wasn't sure if it had dispelled my nerves or made them even worse.

I just couldn't reconcile the two Jasper's. The one I knew- gentle and kind. The Jasper who gave me kisses that blew my mind and made my heart ache. The Jasper I longed to touch, inside and out. And the Jasper I constantly expected to find. Blood red eyes, a complete and total thirst for human blood- including my own. Sadistic and cruel.

The two simply could not exist in the same world, and I knew I had to put my trust in Jasper completely because soon I was literally going to place my life in his hands.

Perhaps I was being over dramatic, but it felt like I was entering the lion's den. And I knew that when Jasper had promised to keep me safe he'd truly meant it. I could see the sincerity in his eyes.

But memories of the past and the pain they caused stopped me from completely taking that leap of faith. And I had to keep reminding myself that I'd only truly known him for two days, even if it felt like longer.

I wasn't just playing with my heart here, I was betting my life on Jasper. Could I afford to do that with someone I didn't even know that well?

My heart was screaming yes but my brain was saying no.

I felt like I had an angel and a demon on my shoulder.

_Slow down Bella, slow down._

_If you always go slowly, you'll never really live your life. You can't always afford to be super conscious Bella._

Both of them were right and I felt like I was being pulled in two. On the one hand, I desperately wanted to put my trust in Jasper and see where our relationship led. I remembered the feeling of his ice cold hands on my skin and wondered how anything so perfect could be dangerous.

On the other hand, I also wanted to run a million miles in the opposite direction screaming. Jasper could kill me if he had half a mind to, and walking straight into a house filled with six other vampires was just downright stupid.

By the time final bell rang, I felt like screaming and ripping my hair out by the roots. I was no closer to a decision than I had been this morning and all I'd given myself was the beginnings of a headache.

So I agreed to disagree with myself and make my decision at the last possible second.

I was jostled by the crowd as everyone rushed to leave.

"Almost the weekend." Someone said as they pushed past me.

I was shocked to remember it was Wednesday already. I'd only arrived in Forks on Sunday and already my life was irrevocably changed.

I only had eyes for one figure in the car lot- the one responsible for that change. He was leaning against the silver Volvo in a completely relaxed pose.

I could feel my heart speed up and I felt a little guilty for not making a decision already. Didn't Jasper deserve my unswerving loyalty? But once I explained what I'd gone through with vampires before surely he'd understand why I found myself unable to place complete trust in him.

I found myself fervently wishing that I'd never even met Mark and Sarah, and that I'd somehow worked out Jasper's true identity. If only that had happened then I'd be free to be with him without these wisps of the past hanging over my head. But it hadn't happened, and there was nothing I could do but accept that fact.

I smiled at him as I approached and his returning grin felt like a dose of pure sunshine to my dour mood. How could I ever doubt him? He'd never hurt me, he'd promised.

"Hello there pretty lady. You ready to go?"

His southern accent seemed to become more pronounced the more time I spent with him. I wondered if this was because he was becoming more comfortable with me, or because I was listening more closely.

Whatever it was, it sent sparks of electricity shooting through my body.

Jasper must have felt the jolt of lust to my system because he grinned. This of course only served to send my blood pressure even higher.

"I didn't mean it quite like that Bella."

I rolled my eyes and playfully tapped his arm, careful not to do myself any injury.

"You shut up and concentrate on driving buster."

He lifted an eyebrow.

"Buster? That's a new one on me."

I couldn't help but laugh. When I was physically with Jasper, all my worries seemed to become insignificant and float away.

I ignored all the interested stares as Jasper opened the door for me and quickly slid into the driver's seat. I blushed and ducked into the car, slamming the door.

Jasper started the engine and slowly reversed out of the lot, careful to avoid Mike's car which had inexplicably stopped in the middle of a turn.

I frowned. What was up with him?

Jasper caught the edge of my curiosity as we drove away.

"What are you thinking darlin'?"

I attempted to ignore the shiver that rolled down my spine at the softly spoken endearment.

"Just wondering what was up with Mike. He could've caused an accident - that was a pretty stupid place to stop."

I couldn't take my eyes off Jasper. It seemed weird to be so completely fascinated by one person, but I was. He just looked so… perfect was the only word that came to mind.

It looked like Jasper was going to say something but then he stopped, and lightly chuckled instead.

"Never mind Bella."

I sighed in frustration and then frowned again as another thought hit me.

"Where's everyone else? Don't some of them ride with you?"

It seemed pretty extravagant to me for each of the five Cullen kids to own their own car, but what did I know of the inner workings of a vampire family?

"Yes, usually Edward and Alice come in this car but I didn't think it was a good idea under the circumstances."

"Oh." Realisation dawned. "Yeah I probably wouldn't have coped so well with being with three vampires in the confines of a car."

Jasper grinned to himself.

"How are you coping being with one?"

"Just peachy, so long as it's you Jasper."

I turned away then, a blush on my cheeks- realising I had probably said too much.

It was as I turned towards the window that I realised how fast we were travelling.

"HOLY JESUS!" I screamed.

I cowered in my seat as the world outside passed by in a blur of colour.

"Bella? What's wrong?" Jasper sounded upset, probably thinking that he was the cause of my panic.

"How fast are we going?" My voice came out as little more than a squeak.

I couldn't move my head to look at him but he sounded confused.

"A little over a hundred, why?"

"A HUNDRED MILES AN HOUR! For god's sake slow down, we'll crash and I'll die!"

His relief was almost palpable.

"Bella my responses are a million times faster than the average human. This feels like a crawl to me, imagine you going at thirty. I can easily avoid any danger."

I felt waves of calm washing over me and grabbed onto them eagerly.

"Jeez, can't you slow down a little Jasper? I'm not used to travelling at this speed."

I felt the car slow down immediately and relaxed back into my seat.

"Driving with vampires is scary." I muttered beneath my breath and closed my eyes against the speed of the passing scenery. We were still going a lot faster than I was used to and I felt a little light-headed.

"Bella are you okay darlin'? I can go slower."

I didn't want to spoil Jasper's fun, it was obvious that he enjoyed going fast so I shook my head.

"No I'll get used to it in a while."

It seemed mere seconds before I felt the car slowing beneath me and cracked an eye open.

"We're here Bella darlin'."

Now my panic hit me full force, all the worse for being forced to the back of my mind from the beginning of the journey. I tried to take deep calming breaths but my lungs refused to comply.

Obviously, Jasper would notice but I tried to bank down my emotions for his sake. However as soon as he opened my door I knew my efforts had been in vain. His face was twisted with pain and I wanted nothing more than to soothe it for him. But I knew it was the backlash from feeling my own panic, so I concentrated on that instead.

"It's ok Bella. It's ok darlin', I've got you."

I vaguely felt Jasper pulling me from the car into his arms. I wrapped my arms round his neck and held on tight as I rode out the sickening waves of panic.

"Sorry… I'm sorry." I managed to choke out between quick snatched breaths.

"It's not your fault." Jasper's voice sounded strained and I felt a healthy dose of guilt add itself to my emotional state.

I could feel him stroking the top of my head and focused on the movement, allowing the rhythmic quality to soothe me.

"I should never have brought you here Bella."

I snapped my head off its comfortable place on his shoulder and stared at him wide-eyed.

"Jasper don't you dare blame yourself for this!"

I was surprised at how strong my voice sounded, considering I just felt like collapsing on the floor and never getting back up.

"It's not your fault I lived with two sadistic vampires for the best part of eight years. I trust you Jasper; I just need to get over this."

I dropped my head to his shoulder again, my meagre store of energy spent. I breathed in his smell and was amazed that such a scent could even exist on this earth.

I felt the last shudders wrack my body and then I lay still. Gingerly I lifted my head again and stared into two twin amber orbs filled with concern.

"I'm ok Jasper. I just need a minute."

I realised we were sat on the floor but couldn't bring myself to care about the state of my clothes. I dropped my head again.

I squeezed my arms tighter around Jasper's neck even though I knew he couldn't feel my puny human strength. I felt a sense of gratitude and affection roll over me and didn't try to hide them from Jasper.

I felt him press a gentle kiss to my head.

"Take as long as you need darlin'."

I took a few more deep breaths and made my first attempts to stand. Jasper's hands immediately went to my waist and I was glad of the support, although it affected me in an entirely different way.

I heard Jasper laugh and smiled sheepishly.

"Seems like you're feeling better." His voice still sounded far from happy and I lifted my eyes to his.

They were swimming in regret and concern and I unconsciously pressed my hand to the side of his face, trying to give comfort.

He pressed a kiss to my palm and helped me to stand.

"Here goes nothing." I muttered to myself, straightening my clothes as best I could. It was only then that I realised I was wearing skinny jeans and a t-shirt for my first meeting with his family.

Jasper immediately responded to my anxiety by tightening his grip on my waist and I placed one of my hands on top of his.

"I'm ok Jazz, I just realised what I'm wearing that's all."

He laughed and didn't comment on my use of the shortened use of his name.

"Well I'd rather it was that than anything else. But you look beautiful Bella."

I stared into his eyes and heard the sincerity in his voice. As long as Jasper was with me, I knew I could do this.

I would not allow Mark and Sarah to run my life again.

I gently disengaged Jasper's hands from my waist and took his hand in mine, squeezing gently.

I took a deep breath as we turned towards the house.

**(A/n sorry couldn't resist ending it there :P don't worry though gang I'm writing the next chapter right now. Wonder if I actually upload too many times during the day... lol)**


	13. Chapter 13

"_I would not allow Mark and Sarah to run my life again._

_I gently disengaged Jasper's hands from my waist and took his hand in mine, squeezing gently._

_I took a deep breath as we turned towards the house."_

**(A/n Okay you'll have to bear with me on this one guys, I'm always a little nervy about writing about the Cullen family. Fingers crossed no one is too OOC :(**** phew here we go… ps yes I admit I did steal some of the house's description from Twilight. Bite me :P Also I changed the story rating specifically for this chapter because it does contain quite graphic details of physical violence. If you don't want to read about it it's probably best if you just skip this chapter. I won't say enjoy, because it's probably too much of a harrowing chapter to do that. But I hope you appreciate it at least. R & R as always guys)**

I tried to imagine we were simply meeting Jasper's family. A normal family. I already knew what his brothers and sisters looked like. Emmet looked like he could snap me in two on his own.

I felt Jasper squeeze my hand in reaction to my new wave of anxiety and smiled at him gratefully.

There was no way I would be doing this if it wasn't for him. At this moment, facing possibly my greatest fear, life had never tasted so sweet.

The house was huge, of course, just to make me feel even more inadequate. It stood enduring and elegant, as if to remind me of my own small and puny lifespan. It was three stories tall, well proportioned and painted a soft faded white.

If I wasn't so panicky, I probably would have stopped just to take it all in. It must be a hundred years old at least.

"You like it." It was a statement, not a question. I looked at Jasper again and smiled.

"I do. But I'm disappointed, where are all the bats and cobwebs?"

He laughed and I felt the tension in my chest ease a little.

"They're on the inside darlin'."

We were walking across a huge expanse of lawn, if you could call it that, under the shade of six giant trees. I didn't know what type they were but they spread their branches over us in a way I didn't know whether to describe as comforting or creepy.

The windows and doors must have been built with the house because they looked like they had been there forever.

"Really makes you consider your own mortality doesn't it?" I whispered. Jasper sent me a concerned look and I rolled my eyes.

"Not in a morbid way doofus."

He laughed and pulled on my hand, gently. I obediently went closer and shivered when he whispered in my ear.

"Who are you calling a doofus darlin'?"

There was no implied threat in his words and I took them at face value.

"You duhbrain."

"Oh, duhbrain is it now? You forgotten my real name missy?"

"Jasper…" I breathed as he skimmed an icy hand down the side of my neck.

"You got it right now." He laughed as I sent him a frustrated look and pulled me through the deep shade to the porch that wrapped round the front of the house.

I couldn't help the tensing of my body as we went through the door but he made no mention of it.

The inside was not at all what I expected, but I was beginning to think not all my previous expectations applied here.

It was extremely light and open, and the entire back wall was made of glass. The huge space made me feel stupid for feeling hemmed in before. The west of the room was dominated by a huge spiral staircase and I could see the lawn stretching down to the river through the glass wall.

The ceilings were high and white, with beams, and I suddenly felt very small. The walls were also white, and the carpets too. Even the wooden floor beneath my feet was white.

"I feel like I should wipe my feet at least a million times before stepping anywhere."

I heard a laugh from my left and turned my head.

The two figures were unfamiliar but of course, I knew who they were. They were standing on a raised portion of the floor next to a truly magnificent grand piano. They moved no closer to us, trying not to frighten me I guessed.

I finally understood what Angela had meant when she'd said that Dr Cullen was gorgeous. His hair was lighter in colour than Jasper's and his features were perfect and angular.

Poor Angela. Bet she didn't know what hit her.

Being used to utter vampire beauty was definitely an asset here. The other figure was a woman, obviously Esme. Her face was heart shaped and her hair was caramel coloured. It looked soft. She looked soft, like a mother. I could imagine her being in an old movie, in soft focus, perhaps with a cigarette holder…

I was interrupted from my mental musings by someone speaking to me.

"Hello Bella. I appreciate you coming here today."

It was Carlisle speaking to me and I stirred my vocal chords into life.

"Hello Dr Cullen. It's not a problem."

I was proud of the way my voice didn't shake with my inner tension. I supposed being in the company of vampires again had reminded me of the hard won talent of hiding my emotions.

"Carlisle please Bella."

I inclined my head apologetically.

"Carlisle."

The next voice was Esme's.

"Bella dear I can't imagine how hard this is for you. I just want you to know that none of us would ever dream of hurting you."

It was strange how truly comfortable I felt in their presence. Their amber eyes were so different from Mark and Sarah's I almost forgot what they truly were.

"I know."

I wasn't sure what I was going to say next, but I was saved from it by a sudden crushing feeling.

Emmet was hugging me.

"Hey Bella!" He sounded excited and I struggled to breathe.

"Get off her Em!" Jasper sounded annoyed and I tried to find the breath to reassure him.

"Oops, sorry Bella." Emmet dropped me suddenly, but by some miracle, I managed to stay upright.

I wheezed for a moment, flapping my hand at Jasper.

"Whoo. That was a hug and a half Emmet."

I physically felt the atmosphere relax as everyone realised I wasn't about to freak out and collapse on the floor.

He grinned at me and little dimples popped out on his cheeks.

"How's it hangin' Bella?"

I laughed, a little raspily.

"I'm not sure Emmet, it's probably broken."

Jasper smacked Emmet in the back of the head, but not hard enough to really hurt him.

"Ow Jazz, you remind me of Rose when you do that." Emmet grumbled, rubbing his head.

"Speaking of which, where is Rose Emmet?" It was Carlisle who spoke.

"Sulking of course." Emmet replied and I couldn't help but feel a little guilty.

Jasper was by my side in moments.

"It's not your fault Bella. Rose enjoys sulking, believe me."

I smiled at him. This family was so strange, so different from what I was used to. They were just like normal people really. I wasn't worried that any of them would jump on me and suck my blood anymore. I mean, Emmet had just put his head right next to my neck without as much as a flicker of bloodlust.

No the only anxiety left now was for what I had to do.

I had to tell my story, my darkest secret. I had to tell them all that I was so weak, so pathetic, that I couldn't even speak up to save someone's life if my own was at risk.

Jasper took my hand and I was glad of the contact. Sometime during the exchange, Esme and Carlisle had drifted closer without me noticing and I wondered what they thought of Jasper's action.

"Ooh I wondered why you were all covered with dirt Bella." Emmet looked at our joined hands and winked. "I guess now I know."

"Don't be disgusting Emmet." Jasper hit him again with his free hand and I laughed.

"See, Bella sees the funny side." Emmet grumbled good-naturedly. I suppose you could compare his personality to a tame lion, if there was such a thing. Big and scary at first, but a complete pussy cat underneath. Although he was more of a bear.

"Please Bella." Carlisle gestured to the big table. I guessed this was where the family would be gathering to hear what I had to say.

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared or afraid. But I was more terrified of what they would think of me when I was finished. Would Jasper even want to be with me anymore?

Jasper squeezed my hand in response to my anxiety and I blinked.

Suddenly Edward had appeared from nowhere. He looked very different to either Jasper or Carlisle, but of course, he still had typical vampire good looks.

I smiled at him tentatively and he returned the gesture with one of his own.

"Hello Bella." He turned to Carlisle and said something in vampire speed. Whilst my ear had once become attuned to the speed, so I could actually barely catch some of the words, now I was completely lost. I guessed if I spent any length of time with the Cullen's I'd soon pick that skill up again.

Carlisle nodded and Jasper gently pulled me towards the table.

I took a couple of deep breaths and squeezed until I had a death grip on Jasper's hand. Of course, he wouldn't feel anything, but the painful pressure helped me to take my mind off what I had to do.

"Rosalie isn't coming Bella so please, just start as best you can dear." Esme smiled at me kindly and I felt a little of the anxiety release its grip.

I sat next to Jasper, keeping our hands joined the whole time. The rest of the family arranged itself around the table. Alice came bounding down the stairs, graceful as a dancer.

She beamed at me and clapped her hands excitedly.

"Bella! We're going to be really good friends you know."

I wasn't sure how you were supposed to react to something like that, so I just settled for smiling.

Alice took her place next to Edward and I frowned slightly, wondering how to start.

I stared at the tabletop as I started to speak. I couldn't bring myself to watch the emotions play across the beautiful faces of Jasper and his family.

"Charlie and Renee gave me up for adoption when I was six years old. I spent five years in a foster home."

"Occasionally people would come to see me and I would try my best to make them like me. I wanted someone to take me out of that place. But they never did. I guess I was always a sour little thing. It wasn't too bad, just the usual. I didn't really get along with the other kids and my mortal enemy Alex Chester stuck some gum in my hair."

I was remembering sitting in the office while Sally cut it out with some scissors.

"My social worker Sally took me into the office and cut it out with some scissors. I was crying because I hated watching my hair fall onto the floor. Then she told me some people wanted to see me. That was the first time I met Mark and Sarah."

Jasper squeezed my hand in support and I felt tears starting to collect in my eyes.

"I was enchanted with them. As a little kid, I thought they looked like the prince and princess out of a fairy tale. Classic vampire good looks. A couple of weeks later they adopted me. I imagine a lot of money changed hands, because it was done extraordinarily quickly really. I was just ten years old though, I didn't really care. I just wanted to live with my pretty new parents. They were flashy; they bought me lots of toys and things like that. I imagined that meant they loved me."

I felt my breath hitch but swallowed down the sob and carried on.

"They gave me my own room at their house and everything. I was ecstatic. I'd never had my own room before. I trusted them completely. It was about two weeks after I moved in that they brought the first one in."

I was remembering now the terror and confusion I felt that first time.

"She was a girl, around eighteen. She was pretty, young. Sarah brought her into my room, holding her by the throat. I never could forget how her eyes bulged out and how terrified she was. I didn't know what they had brought her there for. Mark smiled at me, so sweetly, and then broke one of her fingers."

There was complete silence around the table. I was lost in my memories.

"I remember her scream and how scared I was. But most of all I remember the way Mark's face looked the first time he got a taste of my terror. There isn't a word to describe it."

I was silent for a few moments, just managing to hold myself together.

"Mark's power, I refuse to call it a gift, was sort of the opposite of Jasper's. He fed off people's emotions. Bad ones especially. Fear and terror thrilled him to no end. And Sarah was completely under his control. The first and last time she came close to biting me, he backhanded her across the room. The dent in the wall was huge. She never did that again."

"Oh Bella…" Esme was the first to break the silence.

I didn't reply- I knew I had to get this out before I completely broke down.

"After that they used to bring someone in practically every night. Sometimes twice if Mark was feeling particularly cruel. Mark would always come in first, smiling. Then Sarah would bring the victim in. I stopped thinking of them as people after the first few times. It was easier. I never wanted to look at them; I couldn't bear to watch their faces. Mark used to hold me by the neck and force me to watch as Sarah bit into their necks and drained them dry. Then she would leave and Mark would stay to absorb the full extent of my panic. I can't count the number of times I cried myself to sleep in that room, watching as they lay slumped against the wall covered in the blood. The eyes were the worst. They always seemed to be looking at me, accusing me. But of course, they were blank. They used to leave the bodies in there overnight and move them the following morning. I don't know how they were never caught- they killed so many."

I squeezed Jasper's hand so tightly that it was actually painful for me. He sent me waves of calm.

"Sometimes they would invite their friends over, the ones with useful gifts. One of the worst, Benjamin, he could send electricity through you with a simple touch. They used to let him torture me while they watched. They _enjoyed_ my pain. Only one person ever stood up for me in those eight years. He was an empath called Sylvester. I don't think he knew what they were really like when he met them. He was in the house when Mark and Sarah brought a victim up to my room. He drank human blood, so he followed them. When he felt the utter terror and pain I was feeling, he started screaming. He couldn't take it. He was screaming at them to stop, the emotions were too much. They ripped him apart in front of me and burned the pieces. They told me I'd never get out of that house."

Just a little longer Bella, you can break down later. I wanted to break down so badly, it was only my grip on Jasper's hand that anchored me to reality.

"I lost all hope then. I just watched as they brought the victims in, crying before Sarah even touched them. On the night of my eighteenth birthday, they told me I could leave. I couldn't believe it. I thought it was surely a trick. They said that the police had finally become suspicious of them and they had to move. Sarah was all for killing me right there but Mark wouldn't. He said that the authorities would get too nosy if I suddenly died. He was loath to let me go though; he enjoyed his little human toy. I packed up and left that night and I never looked back. I spent the best part of the next year living on the streets, homeless shelters that sort of thing. Just while I got my head together. I saw true human nature out there on the streets. People are what they choose to be. Some were so kind with me, sharing what little food and shelter they had. Some beat me until I couldn't stand."

Absentmindedly I lifted up the hem of my t-shirt. There were gasps of shock from around the table. I knew what they could see but I didn't dare to look. To look at my ugly white scar would only break the tentative hold I had on my seething emotions.

"Someone slashed me with a bottle, right across the stomach. A doctor managed to sew me back up but I was permanently scarred. In more ways than one. I didn't tell anyone what had happened to me, I didn't dare. Mark promised that he would find me if I ever mentioned this to anyone. I believed him. A couple of months ago I finally pitched up in Phoenix. I got myself together, got a job, got my truck. I was getting my life back on track. My social worker Sally still thought I was with Mark and Sarah. I told her that I wanted to meet my real parents and Mark and Sarah didn't approve. Seeing as I was nineteen there was nothing they could do about it. I made the necessary arrangements and came down to Forks."

I finally looked up then. Esme looked like she would be crying if she could, Carlisle had his arm round her shoulders. He looked completely and utterly shocked.

"How could someone do that to another human being?"

I shrugged.

Edward looked torn between shocked and angry. Alice looked as broken as Esme was. Emmet looked murderously angry.

I looked at Jasper last. His amber eyes were jet black with emotions. Fury, pain, regret, concern, shock.

"God Bella…"

I forgot that I was sat at a table with his family and did what came naturally to me. I placed my hand on the side of his face.

"Jazz?"

He lifted his head and looked at me. There was such emotion in the depths of his eyes the dam I'd placed on my emotions broke.

I started to shake uncontrollably and pressed my arms round my middle, trying to hold myself together. It felt like I was splintering apart.

"Bella!" Jasper was shouting at me but I was only dimly aware of it.

I started to sob, rocking backwards and forwards on the chair.

"Carlisle!" Jasper shouting again. It hurt my head.

"Her brain is shutting down Jasper. She's trying to protect herself."

As the blackness descended on me I wondered if there was any way to protect myself from this.

**(A/n okaaay the worst is over I think. I feel the sudden need to make the next chapter as fluffy as possible just to make up for this. But it was unfortunately important to the story. I'll try and make the next chapter more cheerful guys, don't give up hope on the romance element of this story ^_^)**


	14. Chapter 14

_As the blackness descended on me I wondered if there was any way to protect myself from this._

(**A/n whew sorry I couldn't update yesterday guys, after writing the last chapter I really did feel emotionally drained. I had no idea how to describe Jasper's room, so I'm just going with it haha. Ps. do you think that Jasper is too comfortable with the family? Just a feeling I got while writing it, but I wanted it to be like Bella changed him for the better. Anyways I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT and r&r as always gang :D)**

BPOV

*DREAM*

_I was running through the woods, Jasper's house in the distance. All I knew was that he was in danger and I had to get there but it seemed the faster I ran the slower I went._

"_Jasper!" I screamed. I wasn't sure why I was crying._

_I lifted up a hand to move a branch out of the way and screamed. My hand was as white as paper, smooth and elegant. It didn't look like my hand anymore._

_Suddenly Mark appeared from somewhere, holding a lighter in front of his body._

"_Hello Bella dear. I told you not to tell anybody…"_

I knew it was a dream and I tried to fight my way to the surface. I wanted to get out of here more than anything.

I could feel myself being pulled towards consciousness but not before Mark pulled out a mirror and showed me my own face.

I screamed again. I had red eyes and my face was unrecognisable.

I burst into consciousness thankfully, shaking and sobbing.

The first thing I noticed was how dark the room was, but I was glad of that. My eyes hurt from all the crying.

"Bella?" Jasper's voice. I lifted my head out of the pillow and spun myself onto my back. The movement cost me - I couldn't move anywhere after that.

He was in front of me immediately, a smooth and cool hand stroking back my hair from my forehead. Just the sight of his face was heaven. It felt like I'd been walking in a desert for twenty years and Jasper was my first drink of water. I drank him in greedily, feeling my body start to relax.

"Jasper…" My voice was hoarse and my throat hurt but I needed to talk to him.

My brain was only half-functioning right now and I was trying to take in my surroundings.

I was in a bed, obviously, because I'd woken up face down in a pillow damp from my tears. The sheets were soft and cool against my fevered skin.

The walls were a soft blue. There was a name for it. I struggled for a few seconds, determined not to let this tiny piece of information get away from me.

"Eggshell blue." I said, pleased with myself. Jasper looked confused; he probably thought I'd been mentally affected by my ordeal.

"The walls." I laboured to raise an arm and point before letting it flop pathetically back onto the sheets.

I felt like all my limbs were weighed down with lead and struggled to sit up. Jasper gently placed a hand on my shoulder. The ensuing jolt of electricity served to wake me up quite nicely.

I slowly pulled myself up, reaching behind me to pull up a pillow. I collapsed gratefully backwards and took in more details.

The bed felt huge to me but in reality it was only a double. I was used to singles and it seemed to stretch out in front of me in acres of white cotton.

To my left there was a bedside table with a lamp and beyond that shelves that ran the length of one wall. These seemed to mainly contain books and cd's but it was too dark to see them properly.

Jasper was sat on the edge of the bed to my right and I unconsciously angled my body towards him.

"How are you feeling Bella?"

I'd never been one to try and deny that I was feeling like death warmed over but Jasper really did look worried.

"Tired but otherwise ok."

My throat felt like sandpaper and I pressed a hand to it as if I could soothe away the pain.

"Do you want a glass of water darlin'?"

There was an emotion in Jasper's eyes that I didn't want to name. Because if I was right and he was feeling guilty, that would only serve to extremely annoy me.

I nodded, saving my voice in case I had to shout at him in a minute.

He disappeared and reappeared a couple of seconds later. Being used to vampire speed it didn't bother me when he moved so fast.

I squeezed my hand into a fist, making sure I would actually be able to hold the glass. I gingerly took it from him and lifted it to my lips.

I drank slowly, keeping an eye on him all the while. He was watching me just as closely.

"You were crying in your sleep Bella. You said my name."

I stopped drinking for a minute to reply.

"Bad dream."

That was all the explanation I was prepared to give at the moment. I wasn't sure but I had a feeling that Jasper was going to try and blame himself for my total breakdown.

Sure enough, my suspicions were confirmed once he'd taken the empty glass from my hands.

"Thanks. I feel much better now."

"I should never have brought you here Bella, look what I've done to you."

If I hadn't been so tired I would have sat bolt upright.

"What are you talking about Jasper?" Even if he hadn't been an empath, my annoyance showed in my voice.

He ran a hand through his curls and left it there, hanging his head.

"I kept pushing you for an answer Bella. If I'd have known darlin', I never would have asked."

I used a good portion of my strength to scoot myself behind him. I felt his surprise as I laid my head on his shoulder and squeezed an arm round his waist.

"Silly Jasper." I repeated the words he'd said to me not so long ago.

"Bella…"

"No Jasper, I won't let you blame yourself for this." My voice was getting stronger.

"I wanted; no I needed to do this. I can't go through the rest of my life holding something like that on my own shoulders Jazz. I needed to let that out. Sure, what happened afterwards wasn't ideal but I will not allow you to take responsibility for _my_ emotions. So if you're even thinking about feeling guilty you can just stop it right now."

I felt his hand cover mine at his waist and squeeze.

"I don't deserve you Bella. How can you even stand to be in the same room as me after what they did to you? We're two of a kind."

"Jasper if you don't stop being an idiot you're really going to get on my nerves." My voice was filled with tenderness and I was overflowing with affection for the vampire I was currently hugging.

Poor Jasper.

"It's never good to be at odds with who you are. And that's what concerns me. _Who_ you are, not _what _you are. And I know you're different Jazz. You wouldn't hurt somebody like that."

I felt his body tense and scooted closer, trying to give what little comfort I could.

"You don't know about my past Bella. You don't know what I've done or the humans I've hurt. I've sent many vampires to their death."

A day ago, this would have shocked and disgusted me and it did surprise me a little. I was amazed that such a gentle and kind person could ever do something to hurt someone. But in the end, it didn't really matter, because this wasn't just anyone. This was Jasper.

"Everyone makes mistakes Jazz. You think I didn't hurt people when I was living on the streets? I was angry at the world; I thought it owed me something after what I'd been through. But what matters is the person I am now and you're no different. In my own way, I've killed people too. I could have stopped Mark and Sarah draining those people dry, but I put my own life first. What kind of person does that?"

"A smart person Bella. Please tell me you don't blame yourself for their deaths? There was nothing you could have done."

I eagerly seized on his words.

"That proves my point Jazz. It's just as stupid for me to blame myself for something beyond my control as it is for you. Vampires don't get special treatment in the guilt department you know. So stop feeling guilty before I get Emmett to kick your ass."

I heard a booming laugh from downstairs and smiled to myself.

Jasper spun round quickly and pulled me into a tight hug. I dropped my head to his shoulder and breathed in his unique smell.

"I could die right here." I whispered and he immediately pulled away. I grabbed his arm.

"No stupid, I meant I could die with happiness. If you're going to insist on misinterpreting everything I say I'm going to get really snippy."

He smiled at me and moved to hug me again. I lifted my arm up and rested my hand on his cheek. It felt smooth and cool, and familiar. He purred and I grinned.

I sighed and I felt his mouth move against my hair in a smile.

"Overload me with lust there Bella."

I heard Emmett's laugh booming from downstairs and disentangled myself.

"Stop earwigging Emmett!"

Jasper lifted an eyebrow and I smothered a laugh.

"Earwigging?"

"Sorry, it's an English expression I picked up from Sally. A good description of people who _listen in to people's private conversations cough cough Emmett."_

Jasper grinned and I felt my heart skip a beat.

"I'll get him for that later."

"Good." I fake pouted but stopped when he traced my lips with a cool thumb.

Feeling bold, I opened my mouth slightly and gently touched his thumb with my tongue. I had no idea what I was doing with this kind of thing and I was running purely on instinct.

"Bella…"

By the sound of Jasper's groan, I was doing something right.

My heart jumped into overdrive as he leaned in towards me and I caught the edge of his grin.

Then our lips touched and the world stopped again. He was gentle, but it didn't feel like he was holding anything back from me. My hands reached up to fist in his hair and one of his rested on the small of my back, the other on my waist. The kiss grew in intensity and I felt my body start to ache.

When I ran tongue over his bottom lip, he granted me entrance. Soon control was taken from me and I gave it gladly. Our tongues danced and tasted, exploring.

I felt like my bones were liquid fire and I had to break away to breathe.

There was a sudden knock at the door and I felt resentment flood my system. Stupid stupid person, interrupting what felt like heaven.

Emmett walked in and grinned at my state of breathlessness.

"Careful there Jazz, you'll give the poor human a heart attack."

He'd walked close enough to the bed for me to reach out and smack him gently in the arm. He grinned at me and I couldn't help but return it- his smiles were infectious.

"Didn't feel a thing Bells."

"It's ok; I'll just get Jasper to do it for me." I smiled sweetly and Jasper laughed behind me.

"What do you want anyway?"

"Time for the human to go back."

I felt a sudden rush of panic clutch my system. I did not want to be alone tonight. I blindly grabbed Jasper's hand and held on for dear life.

"No Jazz, I can't."

I felt like crying again and only held myself together because Emmett was in the room.

"It's late Bella." Jasper squeezed on my hand and sent waves of calm over to me.

"I couldn't give a damn if it was three o'clock in the morning. The only way you're getting me to move is if you physically make me."

On some level, I knew I was being stupid but I was genuinely terrified. I knew if I went back to my empty hotel room tonight the bad dreams would continue. And there would be no Jasper to soothe my fears this time.

I did feel a little bad for practically demanding that I stay, but I wasn't in the mood for pretending to be a big brave girl tonight. All my defences had been broken down.

Carlisle suddenly appeared in the doorway. I figured he'd heard the conversation from downstairs.

"Bella's right Jasper, it's probably better if she stays here tonight."

I smiled gratefully at him. At least somebody was on my side.

He returned the smile and then disappeared. Emmett followed suit, pausing at the door.

"No funny business guys." He waggled his eyebrows ridiculously and I couldn't help but laugh. I quickly picked up a pillow and lobbed it at him but he caught it easily.

"Oh, getting defensive Bella?"

"Just go do whatever you're doing Emmett and stop annoying me." I laughed.

Jasper caught the returning pillow and Emmett's huge figure disappeared.

I flopped gratefully backwards onto the soft mattress and sighed. I felt Jasper get up off the bed and sat up immediately.

"Just going to get you some pyjamas Bella."

"Oh I hadn't thought about it."

"Well whilst it would be interesting if you slept naked I highly doubt it's a good idea."

I stuck my tongue out at him and he laughed.

"What about my clothes for school tomorrow?"

He rolled his eyes in a completely uncharacteristic gesture.

"Alice has already been out and bought you tons of clothes Bella."

I frowned.

"Why on earth would she do that?"

"Alice loves any opportunity to shop trust me. Ever since she saw you coming, she's been talking about nothing else. No one else will go with her anymore. Willingly at least."

I was thoroughly confused now.

"Saw me coming?"

"Alice sees the future, she has visions."

I soaked this in for a minute.

"So she saw me coming before I even arrived? I bet that comes in handy."

"Sure does."

He left the room and I couldn't help but feel a little freaked out. Was my life really that set in stone? Could Alice see what would happen to me in twenty years time?

I felt a shiver go down my spine. If she could, I didn't think I wanted to know.

I put Alice and her visions out of my head and let my mind wander.

Of course, I thought about Jasper immediately. The gorgeous vampire who could liquefy my bones with one touch. How did I really feel about him? Surely, it was too soon for love?

That thought had sneaked up on me and I sat bolt upright.

Love? Me? With Jasper?

I laughed weakly to myself. Not possible- I'd only known him for three days. A lot may have happened in those three days but I was too young for love.

I flopped back onto the bed.

Wasn't I?


	15. Chapter 15

_I was too young for love. I flopped back onto the bed. Wasn't I?_

(**A/n wow is it just me or are these chapters getting longer and longer? Haha. I don't own Twilight etc etc. I hope I haven't forgotten anything really important in this chapter, I did get a bit carried away *grins sheepishly* as always, enjoy guys :D)**

BPOV

I put that thought right of my mind before I gave myself another headache, but it did bring up some questions.

Was Jasper technically my boyfriend? I mean I'd kissed him twice and basically told him the entire sorry story of my life. Did that count?

I sighed. I wasn't exactly going to ask him was I? I could just imagine the scene. "Hi Jasper are you technically my super cool and gorgeous vampire boyfriend?" Cue Emmett's booming laugh.

I was distracted from my musings by Jasper entering the room.

I couldn't help but stare at the clothes he laid out on the bed.

"Those are _pyjamas?!"_

The top was fine, just a simple pink with spaghetti straps, but it was the shorts that concerned me. I wasn't sure if I could even call them shorts. There were more like tiny strips of material.

Jasper grinned sheepishly and shrugged.

"Trust me, these were the best of a bad bunch."

I stared at him. What could be worse than these? I gingerly picked up the "shorts" and looked at them in horror.

My face must have been funny because Jasper cracked up. I threw the shorts at him and he caught them easily.

"Don't laugh at me. Admit it; you just want to see me in those shorts. You're secretly a pervert."

"When it comes to you darlin', maybe I am." He grinned crookedly and I rolled my eyes.

"Give them back, I better get changed."

"I'll be waiting sweetheart." A wave of lust hit my system and he grinned again.

I stuck my tongue out at him as he passed me the shorts.

"I just bet you will." I scooped up the top and gently pushed him from the room.

Of course I couldn't have actually moved him if he didn't want to go anywhere. Vampire super strength.

I changed quickly and longed for a mirror. Looking down at myself, I could only feel worried. Was I fat? Jasper did live in a house of supremely gorgeous people, he was probably biased.

I had a sudden brainwave and jumped into the bed, resisting the urge to pull the covers up until only my head was visible.

_What a time to have a confidence crisis Bella._ The little voice was back again, sneering at me.

I ignored it and folded the sheets over at my waist.

"Jasper?" I called out tentatively, not sure whereabouts he was in the house.

He must have been right outside because he was by my side in moments, lifting an eyebrow at me.

"Tired?" He looked like he knew exactly why I was in bed.

"Yep." I replied brightly. "So whose room is this anyway? I never asked. I know it doesn't really matter because none of you sleep anyway."

"It's my room of course."

"Oh." I looked at the room in a new light. This was where Jasper spent most of his time. This was where Jasper got changed …

Whoa whoa whoa Bella, best not to go down that route of thinking.

I stared up at the ceiling, tracing patterns in the plaster. I shivered as Jasper lay down next to me, trying to keep my mind on boring things.

Suddenly I became aware of an urge of an entirely different kind.

"Bella?"

I determinedly stared up at the ceiling, feeling a blush rise up my cheeks.

"I need a human moment." This was mortifying. "Where's the bathroom?"

I was going to die of embarrassment.

Jasper's hand reached across me and pointed at a door to my right.

"Thanks." I squeaked and jumped off the bed quickly.

"I think there's some spare toothbrushes under the sink darlin'."

I stopped and looked at him.

"Do you have many people staying over?"

Of course when I said people what I really meant was girls. Jasper seemed to read my mind because he looked slightly amused.

"No, it just happens to be where we keep them."

"Oh." And with that witty response, I padded into Jasper's bathroom and closed the door.

I leaned my head back against it and banged it a couple of times.

"Bella? What are you doing?"

"Nothing, I'm fine!" I moved across to the sink and grumbled under my breath.

"Damn vampires and their stupid super hearing."

I was sure I heard a low chuckle from the other room.

Jasper's bathroom could have fit my entire hotel room inside it. Everything was white and the sink was so sparkling I almost didn't want to touch it. There was a shower in the corner but I didn't have a bobble to tie my hair up with so I ignored it.

I stared at my reflection in the mirror above the sink. My hair was all tangled and I sighed. I didn't have a brush with me so I had to use Jasper's. I picked it up and enjoyed the sensation of the smooth wooden handle in my hand. It was kind of strange to think that I was using something that Jasper used every day.

I crouched and opened the cupboard under the sink. Sure enough, there were a number of new toothbrushes under there along with bleach and other cleaning products.

I wondered why there was ever a need to clean the bathroom; surely humans never came in the house? Esme just probably wanted something to do all day if she was stuck in the house on her own while Carlisle was at work. It wouldn't be my favourite situation- to be stuck on my own while Jasper was out. Especially if Carlisle worked the night shift or something. I didn't suppose it would matter to Esme though, she never slept anyway.

I thought about that while I brushed my teeth methodically. I couldn't imagine not sleeping.

As I took care of the rest of my human needs, a thought struck me. It was so obvious that I couldn't believe I hadn't thought of it before. I was getting older and Jasper wasn't. We couldn't stay together like normal human couples.

I was still thinking about this as I left the bathroom again. Jasper was stretched out on the bed but looked up as I entered. He must have felt my whirling emotions because he frowned.

I couldn't help myself as I lay down on the bed, I cuddled into him. I couldn't see his face from my position but I felt him drape his arm across my middle.

"Bella? What's wrong darlin'?"

I shook my head.

"I was just thinking, that's all."

I didn't want to freak him out by telling him what I was thinking. He'd probably run a mile if I started talking about forever.

I unconsciously snuggled closer as my entire system rejected the thought of ever losing him. He smelled so good it was almost a sin.

"You gonna tell me what you're thinking?"

"Nope." I popped the 'p' and felt his sigh of frustration.

"It's nothing important Jazz honestly." I wrapped my arm around his waist and felt my body relax by tiny degrees. I moved closer.

In contrast, he stiffened.

"That's not a good idea Bella."

I frowned.

"Why not?"

"I don't have limitless control you know."

"Oh." That stupid little word again. I started to move back, embarrassed, but he gripped my waist.

"I meant it both ways."

I felt myself starting to blush. Being near me affected Jasper? He wasn't just referring to his bloodlust.

"If I wasn't so modest I'd be feeling a heady sense of power right now." I replied, forgetting to connect my mouth to my brain.

I felt a laugh rumble through his chest.

"I'll get over it Bella. Are you going to sleep?"

"Probably not." I almost didn't want to; I knew the nightmares would return once I closed my eyes.

I felt waves of lethargy pass over me and fought against them.

"Don't fight me darlin'." Jasper whispered in my ear and I shivered. He was so _close_.

"I'm scared to dream Jazz."

I felt affection flood the atmosphere and smiled. He was projecting.

He pressed a kiss to my head.

"I'll be here Bella."

I gave in to the urge to close my eyes and smiled to myself.

"Then I can sleep."

I woke up slowly the next morning. Happiness flooded my body as I realised I'd made it through the whole night without a single nightmare.

As I became a bit more conscious, I realised that I'd wrapped myself around Jasper during the night. My leg was cocked over his hip and my face was pressed into his chest.

"Mornin'."

The strained word came from the man I was currently wrapped around and I moved away quickly, feeling embarrassment flood my system.

"Sorry Jazz."

I sat on the edge of the bed, covering my eyes with my hands. I'd just made a complete slut of myself.

I was shocked as I felt myself being pulled backwards against a rock hard body. Jasper wrapped his arms around me and pressed a kiss to my cheek.

"I don't know what you're feeling sorry for. I quite enjoyed it to be honest."

I felt all my misgivings melt away like mist in the morning sun and lust replaced embarrassment in my emotions.

I turned round in his embrace and impulsively pressed my lips to his. Jasper's kisses tasted so sweet it was untrue.

I shivered as I felt his cold hand on the nape of my neck, holding me to him easily. There was no need; I wasn't pulling away any time soon.

He deepened the kiss and I eagerly followed where he led. His tongue pressed against my lip, asking for entrance. I granted it and gasped as I felt his other hand skim the hem of my top.

I remembered my scar but couldn't quite bring myself to care. It was the need to breathe and the certainty of morning breath that had me pulling away.

"Morning to you too." Jasper sounded as breathless as I was but I reminded myself that he didn't _need_ to breathe.

I scrambled out of bed on wobbly legs, supporting myself on the headboard. I heard him laugh quietly.

"Human moment." I said, still a little breathless and escaped into the bathroom.

I sat on the cool tiled floor and dropped my head into my hands. There was no escaping myself. I had to face the fact that I had fallen in love with Jasper Cullen and I had absolutely no idea if he felt the same.

I fought the urge to cry in frustration and instead stood up. I cleaned myself up and felt a surge of affection as I saw the toothbrush I used last night stood in the glass next to his.

"Oh my god Bella, you're so retarded. Pleased over a freaking toothbrush." I berated myself quietly, forgetting that Jasper could both hear me and feel my emotions.

I felt the wave of affection hit me as he projected his feelings and grabbed onto it eagerly.

He might not be in love with me yet, but he did care for me. That would have to do for now.

I cleaned my teeth quickly and used his brush again. Once I was finished I steeled myself and padded back into the other room.

"I need to go and get my clothes off Alice." I said, avoiding the whole toothbrush episode entirely.

Luckily, Jasper let me off and just moved off the bed too fast for me to follow, taking my hand and leading me out of the door.

It wasn't until we were in a sort of corridor, although it was too wide to really be called that, when I realised.

"WAIT A MINUTE!" I screeched and he stopped immediately.

I pointed down my body and his eyes obligingly followed.

"I don't see a problem." He replied and I rolled my eyes.

"I am not walking around in these. Your parents will think I'm a slut." I hissed. I heard Emmett's booming laugh from somewhere down the hall.

"Shut up Emmett or I will make you wear them!" I shouted.

Jasper just laughed and smiled at me.

"Don't worry about it; Alice's room is just here."

Before I could raise any objections, he'd dragged me through the first door on the left.

I didn't have any time to look around the room because I was immediately hit by a very small vampire.

"BELLA!" Alice's voice was too musical to be screechy, but it would've been if she was human.

"Hi Alice." I said - a little dazed by the impact of her hug. She let go of me and grabbed my hand, leading me somewhere.

I looked back to Jasper, who just held up his hands.

_Help me_. I mouthed.

He laughed.

"I'm not getting involved in one of Alice's makeovers."

When my head stopped whirling I realised we were in what would usually count as another room. But going by the racks of clothes hanging on the walls I guessed it was Alice's closet.

"This amount of clothes is not normal." I muttered underneath my breath and Alice pouted.

"Now Bella I hope you're not going to be difficult. I've been looking forward to this for ages."

I felt a little guilty.

"Of course not Alice. Go for it."

An unholy gleam came into her eyes and I wasn't sure whether to be scared or not.

"We're going to have so much fun!" She exclaimed. I was suddenly buried by a mountain of clothes she was throwing at me.

"Alice, I'm drowning!"

I could hear Jasper and Emmet laughing from the next room. She ignored me and pushed me towards a full length mirror. It had a sort of curtain attached to the wall and ceiling so I guessed it was changing room of sorts.

"Try them on Bella. And I mean _every one_." She swished the curtain across and I was left standing alone with a mountain of clothes in my arms.

"I'm pretty sure this kind of torture is banned under the Geneva Convention." I grumbled.


	16. Chapter 16

"_I'm pretty sure this kind of torture is banned under the Geneva Convention." I grumbled._

**(A/n okay guys you seemed to like my decision in the last chapter so I made another pivotal one in this- confession time for Bella. It's shorter than what was getting to be normal because I felt it could only end where it did. So PLEASE R&R on this one because I'm a little nervous that I'm moving the story on too fast. It just seemed to write itself though. I'm going to slow the pace down for the next couple of chapters. Or at least try to haha, while I try to think of a twist that isn't as obvious as Mark and Sarah suddenly turning up. Yeah you were all expecting that to happen at some point, admit it :P a heartfelt THANK YOU to all my reviewers that gave me the confidence to keep posting these chapters :D)**

BPOV

I was ready to scream if Alice forced me to try on one more thing.

We'd been at this for an hour already and my every attempt to escape had been foiled.

She tried to force another shirt into my hands and I decided it was finally time to put my foot down.

"No Alice."

Her eyes widened.

"No?"

"If I have to put one more piece of clothing on I will not be responsible for my actions."

"Aw don't be like that Bella." She looked upset and I felt bad.

"It's not that I don't like spending time with you or anything, but trying on clothes just isn't my thing."

She still looked miffed.

"Tell you what, as a compromise I'll let you take me shopping next weekend ok?"

"YAY SHOPPING!" She shouted and hugged me tightly.

"Can't….breathe…"

"Oh sorry, I was excited!" She let me go and I regained my breath.

She shoved a pair of jeans and a t-shirt into my hands and I wandered out of the room in a daze.

Jasper and Emmett were standing outside and they cracked up at my face.

"She… how… what just happened?"

This only made them laugh more. Emmett clapped a hand to my shoulder and I felt my knees buckle slightly.

"Alice happened."

"I'm surprised she hasn't been recruited by some secret organisation as torture master. No one would be able to stand up to her."

Jasper pressed a kiss to my forehead.

"Well you've taken the heat off us at least darlin'."

I looked at him in horror.

"She tried to do that to you?!"

Emmett and Jasper cracked up again and I couldn't help but join in.

Carlisle appeared from one of the other doorways and smiled at us.

"Morning Bella."

"Morning Carlisle."

He turned to Jasper and Emmett.

"I'm working my usual shift at the hospital today so I'll see you later."

I grinned.

"You might be seeing me at some point Carlisle. I might faint from exhaustion."

He lifted an eyebrow at me and Jasper and Emmett spoke at the same time.

"One word. Alice."

I laughed as understanding dawned on Carlisle's face.

"Ah. Yes she can be a little… over enthusiastic."

"I CAN HEAR YOU!" A voice shouted from inside Alice's room and I moved closer to Jasper.

"Quick, save me before she grabs me again."

He laughed and took my hand. I looked over my shoulder and waved at Carlisle and Emmett.

I went into Jasper's bathroom to change and laid the clothes out on the side. It was then I noticed a square packet inside the bundle.

I frowned and pulled it out. It was underwear, new inside the packet. It was a bit fancy and lacy for my taste but I figured beggars couldn't be choosers.

I grinned and left the empty packet in Jasper's bathroom, knowing he would find it later. Of course, I'd have to wear my bra from yesterday, even Alice couldn't tell someone's bra size from simply looking at them.

Alice had not gone overboard on the clothes; she had at least taken into account my sense of style. The black designer skinny jeans she'd given me were tighter than my usual choice but I liked them. The shirt she'd given me was cute, a short-sleeved red check with a bow tie at the bottom. I slipped my feet into the red flats I'd worn yesterday, all the shoes Alice had were heels. And I would only fall over in them and break my neck.

I brushed my hair out again and went back into Jasper's bedroom.

I really hoped he wouldn't say something cheesy that would embarrass me, but I did hope that he thought I looked good.

His response was better than I expected.

He projected such a strong wave of lust that I was nearly bent double. He immediately rushed over to my side.

"Sorry darlin', I usually make sure I control that when I see you."

"I'm not complaining, I thought I was alone in that feeling." I grinned at him and he gave me my favourite crooked smile.

I felt the beginnings of it stir in my heart and tried to force it back. All I could think was _no, no, not here. Not now!_

The love was pushing its way outwards, demanding to be free. But I couldn't allow it, Jasper would feel it. Jasper didn't love me back it would just scare him.

I tried desperately to clamp down on the stubborn emotion, thought of anything, everything, in an attempt to force it back where it belonged.

But it was too strong. I felt it burst out from me like I'd switched on my own personal sun. I turned my face away from Jasper and felt the beginnings of tears in my eyes.

"Oh, Bella darlin'…" His voice was tender and I stiffened. I didn't want his pity. There was only one emotion I wanted from him and it wasn't going to happen.

Suddenly I felt strange warmth suffuse my limbs. I snapped my head up at him, my eyes widening in shock.

Was this _love_ he was projecting?

He looked a little anxious, as if he was unsure of himself. I placed a hand on his cool cheek and welcomed the blast of heat.

"Jasper?" My voice was soft, questioning. I allowed my heart to fully communicate what it was feeling. There was no attempt at holding it back now.

"How is that even possible Bella? How could you love someone like me?" Jasper looked shocked. He truly believed what he'd said earlier about his past. There was no room for embarrassment here.

"Of course it's possible silly." Now it was my turn to look unsure.

"I love you." My voice fell to a whisper but I knew he could still hear me.

Although it was only a couple of seconds, the silence seemed to drag on forever. I could hear the rain drumming on the windows and my heart felt constricted.

Jasper looked like he was struggling. He turned away from me and my hand dropped to my side awkwardly.

"I wish I was strong enough to lie and say I didn't feel the same Bella. I wish I was strong enough to make you walk away from me. But I can't. I love you."

I would have felt deliriously happy at his words if it wasn't for his tone of voice, and the way he was standing.

"Jasper, what's wrong? I… I don't understand."

He spun round suddenly and ripped his shirt open. Under normal circumstances this would have sent my blood pressure rocketing but I sensed there was another purpose here.

"Look at me Bella!"

I stood frozen in shock for a few moments. His perfect skin was covered in white scars. They were crescent shaped, like he'd been bitten…

I moved forward, fascinated. He stood completely still while I tentatively traced one.

"What happened Jasper?"

"You're not disgusted." It was a statement, not a question, but he sounded completely shocked.

I stared up at him.

"Of course not. You're beautiful."

He laughed bitterly, and the sound dragged across my nerves like broken glass.

"Far from it Bella. These are vampire bites."

I felt fury rise in me. It didn't matter if I was human, if I ever met the vampire who did this to my Jasper I'd rip their heads off.

"Who?" That was all I could get out past my anger. I flattened my palm against his chest and revelled in the jolt of electricity. I bent my head and gently kissed one of the scars.

"Bella…"

"Will you tell me Jasper?" I pleaded with him, kissing another scar. I felt love overwhelm my system again. Jasper had been through so much more than me. I only had one physical scar.

"Love? Bella I don't understand you. Aren't you revolted by these?"

"No. They're a part of you, and I love you."

"I wasn't always a vegetarian Bella."

I kissed another scar.

"You are now."

"I've killed people Bella. Humans and vampires."

I considered my next words carefully.

"I know I should be afraid. I know I should be shocked. I know I should walk away from you right now Jasper. But I just… _can't_."

Jasper looked torn and I lifted a hand to smooth away the lines wrinkling his cool forehead.

"I'm not afraid of you. I couldn't be if I tried."

"God Bella." Jasper hugged me suddenly and I held on for dear life, feeling the love and affection surging through my veins like fire.

Jasper felt it because he held me tighter and rested his chin on my head.

"I love you Bella."

I felt like my heart would explode from happiness.

"I love you Jasper."

We stayed like that for timeless moments and I wanted to stay in his arms forever. He pulled back and grinned at me sheepishly. Now we were back to normal I felt a shot of lust hit me.

"I better go and get a new shirt."

"Yeah I'm finding it kind of hard to concentrate. And I'm going to need to concentrate when you tell me what happened to you."

He frowned and I felt anxiety hit me. I calmed down when his frown disappeared.

"We need to get to school Bella, we haven't got the time."

I grabbed his hands and held them to my mouth, kissing each fist in turn.

"Will you tell me later? I want to know. You know about my past Jasper, don't be scared to tell me. Nothing could make me feel any different towards you." I said fervently.

His smile felt like the sun rising on my skin.

"Alright Bella, I'll tell you sometime."

I guessed that 'sometime' was all I was going to get right now. And I didn't have room in my heart to worry because I was the luckiest person in the world.

Jasper Cullen, the gorgeous beautiful gentle vampire loved _me._ The frail plain damaged human. I couldn't quite believe that this was happening to me.

My heart felt full to bursting point and I grinned at him helplessly.

I let his hands drop.

"You better go get changed Jazz."

**(A/n okay I just realised how much I have seriously been neglecting Edward and Rosalie, but there is a reason for this. They are after all going to be the "opposition" to the relationship so it didn't feel right to thrust them into the middle of a fluffy chapter. But don't worry gang they'll feature more in the next couple of chapters *^_^*)**


	17. Chapter 17

_Jasper Cullen, the gorgeous beautiful gentle vampire loved me. The frail plain damaged human. I couldn't quite believe that this was happening to me._

_My heart felt full to bursting point and I grinned at him helplessly._

_I let his hands drop._

"_You better go get changed Jazz."_

BPOV

I was pretty sure I was floating. I looked down at my feet. Nope, still firmly anchored to the ground.

Jasper laughed at me and kissed my cheek.

"Wait here for me darlin'."

I was really tempted to say something cheesy, like 'for eternity my love' but I resisted the impulse.

I grinned at him and practically skipped over to the bed. I stopped and retraced my steps, stopping in front of the window.

Edward and Rosalie were jumping over the river and I caught my breath. They looked so graceful. I watched as Emmett ran out and gave Rosalie a huge kiss and a bear hug.

I grinned. It was just pure Emmett.

They were too far away for me to see their faces- they were just blurry figures. The only reason I could tell who they were was by the splashes of colour that were their hair. And of course there was no way anyone could miss Emmett.

I watched for a few minutes longer but they just seemed to be talking. I felt a bit weird just staring out of the window watching them so I moved away.

I wandered over to Jasper's shelves and ran my fingers delicately over the spines of his books. Most of them were about the Civil War. I frowned. How old was Jasper?

I felt rather than saw him enter the room and looked over my shoulder.

"Jazz." I felt a goofy grin spread all over my face before I could stop it. He laughed at me and pressed a kiss to the top of my head.

"You ready to go darlin'?"

"Always." I took his hand and we went out into the corridor again.

I stopped as I remembered something.

"Did I seriously leave my truck in the school parking lot overnight?"

He laughed at me and I looked at him in confusion.

"That's where Alice was, she dropped your truck off at the hotel."

"Oh, that was nice of her. I don't even want to know how she got it started without the keys."

He grinned.

"Vampire skills."

I rolled my eyes at him and laughed.

"Where the hell did I put my bag last night Jazz?"

Whilst I was loath to remind him of my complete emotional breakdown, I didn't have much of a choice.

"It's in the living room under the table. I'll get it for you."

He flashed away and was back again in about fifteen seconds.

"Thank you." I took my bag from his outstretched hand and couldn't help feeling absurdly happy. I rummaged in my bag and found the Hershey bar I'd stashed in there yesterday.

I saw Jasper looking at me as I chewed happily.

"What?"

"Those aren't very good for you darlin'. They have all kinds of chemicals in them…"

I snorted.

"Chemicals schmemicals."

I threw my arms around his waist and hugged tightly. There was no need for words, he could feel the love flowing through me and I could feel him projecting his.

We finally broke apart when Emmett intervened.

"Aw isn't it sweet Rose?"

I spun around and grinned at him.

"If I was a vampire Emmett, I'd totally kick your ass."

As soon as the words were out of my mouth Rosalie's eyes narrowed.

Oh holy crap. The fact is that she looked so much like Lauren that I felt a little giggle tickle my throat.

I cleared it and settled for a friendly smile instead.

"Good morning Rosalie."

"Morning." She turned her head away in a manner that was probably meant to snub me. Out of Jasper's sisters, she was definitely the most standoffish.

I figured the best way to annoy her was to be permanently cheerful.

"Where are Alice and Edward?"

"They're already in the car." Jasper told me, wrapping his cool hand around mine.

Emmett and Rosalie went down the staircase first. I'd been unconscious the last time I went anywhere near it.

I ran my hand along the banister, enjoying the feel of the smooth wood under my hand. Of course, it couldn't compare to what was in my other hand.

Jasper's hand was cool and smooth, and his long fingers were interlocked with mine.

I sighed with contentment and resisted the urge to jump the last couple of steps. No sense in pushing my luck.

Rosalie and Emmett were nowhere in sight by the time we walked out of the door.

"Jeez, human pace too slow for them?" I grumbled and then brightened when I saw Alice waving at me from the backseat of the Volvo. I waved back and she waved harder. Edward said something to her and she pouted at him.

Jasper opened my door and I slid inside, slamming it shut and clipping my seatbelt into place before turning round in my seat.

"Morning guys!"

"Morning Bella!" Alice smiled brightly at me and I was glad at least one of Jasper's sisters was friendly.

"Good morning Bella." Edward's voice was nowhere near as beautiful as Jasper's but it still held a musical quality.

I twisted back to the front and scowled out of the window as Jasper pulled out of the drive.

"Gorgeous Forks weather isn't it? Anyone mind if I put the radio on?"

"Nope, go ahead."

"I don't have a problem with that Bella."

As I was fiddling with the radio to find the station I wanted I wondered why Edward spoke so differently to Alice. I mean, there wasn't that much of an age difference between them was there?

Maybe Alice just adapted to the modern world better than Edward. I didn't know how any of Jasper's family had been changed. I'd have to ask him sometime.

As a familiar tune started, I began to hum along. I liked this station.

Jasper was driving slower than last time I'd been in the Volvo and I guessed it was for my benefit. I smiled to myself and stared out of the window. Green, green, and a bit more green. It still flashed by at an alarming rate, but I figured this was as slow as Jasper could stand.

Before long, the gentle rhythm of the car beneath me lulled me into a relaxed state.

It only took about five minutes to drive from the Cullens into town, probably due to Jasper's fast driving. He slowed down to the speed limit once we entered town though.

I felt the first flickers of anxiety kick into life in my chest as we pulled into the school car lot.

"Jessica is just going to love this. I'll never hear the end of it at lunch."

"You can escape and come and sit with us darlin'."

I relaxed into my seat in relief.

"Oh, my saviour."

I opened my door because I didn't feel like sitting there like a complete vegetable while Jasper walked all the way round the car to open it for me.

"People are staring." I hissed as Jasper took my hand.

"Do you really care?" He asked and I looked into his eyes. That was all I needed to calm my fluttering nerves. Jessica and Lauren could go jump off a bridge for all I cared.

I thought Angela would probably support me in this, but I didn't really know her well enough to be sure.

Jessica's voice rang out across the car lot.

"Hi Bella!"

I cringed. I waved awkwardly and Jasper squeezed my hand.

"You would not believe the curiousity and jealousy coming from over there right now."

I snorted.

"Angela is the only one who is just excited and pleased for you." He sounded amused and I smiled up at him.

"Angela's nice." I replied, deciding to try and get closer to her on the La Push trip this weekend.

"Are you going to go over and talk to Jessica?"

"Are you kidding?" I hissed. "My ears will be bleeding from the shrieking alone."

Jasper laughed and I looked up when he abruptly stopped. Across the parking lot Edward was motioning that he wanted to talk.

He nodded in response to something in Jasper's thoughts and I frowned.

Jasper bent down and pressed a kiss to my forehead.

"Sorry darlin' but Edward needs to talk to me."

"What's going on?"

"Edward thinks there might be another vampire in Forks. He caught a whisper of their thoughts this morning."

"Oh."

"Alice says her visions are hazy though so at the moment we're just treating them as friendly. Sometimes they come around- they get interested in our diet."

"So this vampire isn't vegetarian?"

Jasper looked down at me, hearing the horror in my voice.

"It's ok darlin', Alice is skipping and keeping an eye on the school. I'd do it but they're alreay getting a bit antsy about my attendance. I wouldn't let anything happen to you. Which reminds me, I'm going to pay you a little visit tonight sugar."

"You're coming to my hotel?" I asked, brightening immediately.

Jasper just grinned.

"Yeah I thought we needed some alone time."

"My thoughts exactly. How are you going to get in?"

"There's a handy tree growing outside your window so I'll jump in from there." He kissed my forehead and looked reluctant. "I really had better go. I'll see you at lunch darlin'."

"Missing you already." I mumbled, knowing he could hear me, and threw my arms around his waist for a big hug.

"Love you Bella." He said, wrapping his hands around me and resting his chin on my head.

"Love you too." I was reluctant to let him go but I could see Edward out of the corner of my eye, getting increasingly animated.

"You better go, Edward's gonna burst a blood vessel."

He laughed and gave my hand a final squeeze before dropping it.

"See you at lunch darlin'."

I felt bereft once his hand left mine and watched him for a couple of seconds while he walked over to Edward. He really was unbelievably graceful. I wanted to shout at him to come back.

_Don't leave me with her!_

I turned and started to walk across the car lot towards their group. Mike looked shocked and angry. Tyler looked shocked too. Angela and Jessica looked excited- for two entirely different reasons I didn't doubt. Lauren looked like she would quite happily stab me with the mascara wand she held in her hand.

I wondered why she'd bothered to put more makeup on. Wasn't she already wearing enough? I was surprised she could keep her head upright to glare at me.

"Hi guys." I said brightly as I approached. I was planning on Lauren's presence to keep Jessica from pumping me for information.

Sure enough she didn't even mention the fact that I'd just arrived with Jasper, just mouthed 'talk at lunch' at me.

Mike wasn't so diplomatic.

"So, you and Cullen huh?"

"Yeah." I replied lamely. It looked like Jessica was about to explode with curiousity and I hung back with Angela as the rest of them made their way into school.

"I'm happy for you Bella. Jasper's really nice."

My shock must have shown on my face because she laughed.

"He helped me when I dropped my books once."

"Oh." I said lamely. "Thanks Angela."

She just smiled at me and didn't mention it again. We discussed our plans for this weekend.

I wasn't even sure if I wanted to go to La Push anymore. Mike seemed pretty annoyed over my relationship with Jasper, though I couldn't help wondering why. He couldn't be jealous or anything because he was dating Jessica.

I shook my head. The inner workings of the male mind were a mystery.

I was glad Angela was sat next to me because she provided a quiet restful presence, in direct contrast to the rest of the class who were constantly whispering. I really didn't get why it was such a big deal that I was going out with Jasper.

I wasn't worried about imminent vampire attack because I knew Alice was out there somewhere, protecting the school.

It was weird to think that a vampire was stalking around outside protecting us.


	18. Chapter 18

_I wasn't worried about imminent vampire attack because I knew Alice was out there somewhere, protecting the school._

_It was weird to think that a vampire was stalking around outside protecting us. _

(**A/n just to be clear I didn't make a mistake and write Josh instead of Jacob. Jake isn't going to feature in my story, Josh is my own creation :D)**

BPOV

Ten minutes into class, something finally clicked in my brain and I frowned. How the hell did Jasper know there was a tree outside my room?

_He's probably drove past the hotel like a million times before doofus. _That little voice again.

But how did he know which one was my room? Unless he'd been hanging around in the tree every night since I first met him in the car lot. I'd ask him later anyway.

I wondered how Charlie and Renee were doing. Luckily, I'd had no cause so far to see my dad in his professional capacity so I had no idea what hours he worked. Would he even be home if I went straight after school?

Alice had dropped my truck at the hotel so I'd either have to get a lift off Jasper or walk. I scowled. I would get a lift at all costs; I was not walking anywhere in this rain. I'd cling to the underside of the freaking car if I had to.

Someone nudged me and I looked up. It was a guy- black hair cut a lot shorter than Jasper's, with a fringe that looked like it constantly fell into his eyes. Which were a soft chocolate brown and currently staring straight into mine, while he held a load of sheets in front of me. He looked tanned and I guessed that it was his natural skin colour. No-one in Forks could get a tan.

"Homework, take one and pass it on."

"Oh. I'd say thanks but it is homework after all…"

"Yeah, it sucks right?"

I sighed and tucked a sheet in my bag, absentmindedly passing the rest on to the next desk.

"This is the first homework I've got since I got here."

"Lucky you. You got here Monday though right?"

I was surprised. Wow, someone who wasn't interested in every aspect of my life. Usually people already knew everything about me before I even opened my mouth.

"Yeah that's right. I'm Bella." I held out my hand and he enfolded it in his larger one.

"Hi there, I'm Josh."

I smiled at him, glad to finally be talking to someone outside my usual 'group'. I didn't usually take much notice of the rest of the students though, so that was partly my fault.

"Nice to meet you Josh."

Our attention was called back to the front then and I quickly let go of the hand I was still holding.

When the bell rang I didn't so much as glance at Joshy while quickly gathering my books and hurrying off to my next class.

I wondered what colour Jasper's eyes were when he was human. This reminded me of the fact that he still hadn't explained his scars. I'd have to nag him about it when he came to my room tonight.

I sighed. How long was I going to live in a hotel room, it was starting to get on my nerves already.

I could just move into my parents' house- I gathered that they already had a bedroom set up for me. I'd talk to them about it later. It was just kind of awkward when you haven't seen somebody for nineteen years and suddenly you want to move in. Renee would probably be ecstatic.

If Jasper offered me the chance to move into his house, I'd jump at it. But it was probably too difficult for them to have to deal with the smell of my blood twenty four hours a day instead of just a couple.

It was weird that way- having a relationship with Jasper that is. Because even if I had previously had a boyfriend I still would have been floundering. When your boyfriend is a vampire, suddenly none of the usual dating rules apply. The first time you meet his parents you have a complete mental breakdown and end up staying overnight. The next thing you know he's climbing up sheer walls to jump into your window at night. It kind of messed with your head a little.

I was staring out of a window while musing over all this and that was the only reason that I caught the flash of colour at the treeline. I frowned. Was someone skipping class out there? They must be crazy to go outside in this weather. After that first glimpse, I didn't see anything else so I put it down to imagination and returned to my work before I got into trouble again.

I wondered what Charlie and Renee were doing right now. Charlie couldn't be that busy as police chief of Forks, it wasn't exactly the crime capital of the United States.

I sighed as the rain poured down outside. I should probably go and see them tonight. I felt bad for not visiting since the day I arrived.

I gathered my books quickly at the end of class and walked down to the canteen with Angela at my side.

"I'm going to sit with the Cullens today Angela." I felt like I had to tell her but I felt a little guilty for abandoning her. I couldn't just ask her to come and sit at the table either because I wasn't sure how the rest of the family would react.

I waved a cheery hello to my usual table on my way past and felt a little pleased at the looks on their faces. Lauren's was priceless.

I was sniggering to myself as I approached the Cullen table but I did feel like kind of a sell out. No doubt, they were all thinking that I used them and then threw them away when something better came along. I hated leaving Angela on her own with Jessica and Lauren but it couldn't be helped.

All the guys, even Edward whom I was surprised at, were discussing baseball. At least I think that's what they were talking about; I couldn't decipher it at all. They might as well have been having a conversation in a foreign language for all the sense it made to me.

Jasper broke off from the conversation to greet me.

"Hey darlin'." He frowned. "You've got a different scent on you."

"What?" I asked, sitting down with my lunch and setting it out on the table.

"Did someone touch you?"

I laughed.

"Come on Jasper, like a million humans touch me every day. What difference does it make to my scent?"

He was still frowning.

"I don't know Bella, but I know it's a different scent than usual. And not a nice one either."

"I shook hands with this boy in Trig. Could that be it?" I asked calmly, viciously stabbing a hole in my orange juice carton with my straw. I didn't get why Jasper was making such a big deal out of this.

"I guess it must be." He kept looking thoughtful for a few seconds before his frown disappeared.

"Why did you shake hands with him anyway? Should I be jealous?" He grinned at me and I felt the familiar jolt of lust to my system. I playfully cuffed him in the arm, although I knew he wouldn't really feel it.

"Don't be stupid."

I was glad when our conversation moved onto other less weird subjects. Why on earth should Josh smell that bad to Jasper? He was just like every other human in school after all.

Although once you knew vampires existed you found yourself a little more open to the supernatural. I sniggered to myself. Yeah Bella, he's probably the Abominable Snowman.

I sighed and looked out of the window. He'd sure be at home in Forks; the rain had decided to turn into driving snow.

"What are you sighing away at darlin'?" Jasper asked, taking my hand in his and leaning them both on his thigh.

"The damn weather, what else? I was going to go and see my parents today as well but I don't much fancy driving in that."

Jasper frowned as if he agreed with me.

"I was giving you a lift to the hotel anyway but I might just drop you off at Charlie and Renee's myself. I don't trust your old rust bucket in this weather."

I frowned at him in mock outrage.

"How dare you insult my truck? Alice probably broke it more like. You can't drive it over fifty you know."

Jasper shivered and I giggled.

"Remind me to buy you a new truck as soon as possible."

I stuck my tongue out at him and he grinned at me.

Edward sighed and Jasper hissed at him.

"You know, that really gets old Jasper."

"I wish you could stop reading my thoughts for one damn minute Edward. There's no privacy in this family."

I was confused.

"Edward's power is mind-reading?"

Jasper broke off from his staring match with Edward to smile and answer me.

"Yeah, unfortunately." He must have seen something of my horror on my face because he rushed to reassure me.

"Don't worry, for some reason he can't read yours Bella."

I let out a relieved sigh and he grinned crookedly at me.

"Why are you so pleased, have you been having dirty thoughts?"

I rolled my eyes at him and pouted.

"Oh wouldn't you like to know what goes on in my imagination?"

Emmett broke in.

"Bella's a pervert, Bella's a pervert."

I blushed and shot him a look while Rosalie smacked him in the back of the head.

"Shut up Emmett you idiot." I replied hotly.

His booming laugh echoed across the cafeteria and caused a couple of people to turn and look.

Edward saved me by engaging Emmett in another conversation about baseball and I smiled at him gratefully.

"What are your plans for this weekend darlin'?" Jasper asked me, his thumb rubbing circles of fire onto my palm.

"I'm going up to La Push on Saturday I think. Mike asked me a couple of days ago."

I happened to be watching Edward at this point so I saw him stiffen slightly. Jasper stopped tracing circles on my hand and looked at me intently.

"La Push?"

I looked at him, confused.

"Yeah. You guys go there a lot or something?"

Edward shook his head.

"We don't go on Quileute land Bella."

"Quile-what now?"

Emmett laughed, drawing everyone's attention to our table again.

"The tribe that live on the reservation Bella. We have an ancient treaty with them. We don't go on their land and they don't reveal our secret."

I stared at him.

"You mean everyone up there's knows your secret?"

He shrugged.

"A lot of the younger kids don't really believe the ancient stories of the 'Cold Ones'. But we keep our word anyway."

"Wow." I thought for a minute. "But the treaty is ancient? How many times have you guys lived in Forks?"

"We lived here a long time ago, so this is our second time around. We like this town."

"Oh." I said, falling back on my usual response when I couldn't think of anything else to say.

Edward suddenly looked at Jasper and nodded, in response to something in his thoughts I guessed.

"You should probably stay away from this Josh Bella."

I looked at him sharply.

"Why on earth would I do that?"

Jasper sighed and squeezed my hand a little.

"Just trust me when I say that it's best for you."

I was thoroughly confused now and Jasper could feel it.

"He could be dangerous Bella. That's all I can tell you."

I frowned at him.

"More dangerous than you guys?"

Edward started talking again.

"We have control Bella, that's the difference. Is it really going to affect you that much to just do as we ask?"

Whilst I didn't like his slightly sharp tone I had to admit that he had a point.

"Not really, I only met him today after all. I'm just curious as to why I have to stay away."

"You know curiosity killed the cat." Rosalie spoke up for the first time during the conversation and Edward looked at her, frowning.

"I don't quite think it will come to that Rose."

"Damn straight." Jasper muttered under his breath, so quick and low that I almost didn't hear.

The lunch bell rang then, interrupting the weird exchange and Jasper grabbed my tray to take over to the bin.

We paused at the cafeteria double doors and I was surprised when he bent down and pressed a kiss to my lips. He pulled away before I could deepen it and I pouted.

"Just tell me you'll be careful down at La Push Bella."

I frowned at him.

"Of course."

He grinned at me and I forgot my foul mood.

"Love you Bella."

I could feel the warmth of his love spread through my entire body and wondered how I could ever be annoyed with him for any length of time.

"Love you too Jazz."

With that, we had to part and I made my way slowly to class, turning over the weird conversation in my head.

How could Josh ever be dangerous? And why was Jasper so concerned about La Push?


	19. Chapter 19

_How could Josh ever be dangerous? And why was Jasper so concerned about La Push?_

Even though I knew that the Cullens only had my best interests at heart, even Rosalie I guessed, it still sort of annoyed me that they'd basically warned me off someone.

But how could I argue against Jasper? If he said something was dangerous to me then it obviously was. So I'd stay away from Josh as best I could. It wasn't like I was going to see him anywhere aside from school anyway.

I wondered if there were any other kids from the reservation at our school. I wasn't sure how far La Push was from school, the only places I'd driven in Forks were off the main street.

I was really looking forward to some alone time with Jasper tonight. I hadn't gotten a proper kiss off him for a while and I was suffering severe withdrawal symptoms. We had a million other ways of touching, just small things like holding hands or hugs, but every one of those moments was precious to me. I loved Jasper more than life itself and I wanted to be with him forever.

I wondered if he would agree to change me once I graduated. I felt a twinge of guilt. We'd have to tell Charlie and Renee that I went back to Mark and Sarah or something. They would probably think that I didn't want them and thought they were really bad parents. I could e-mail them or something though. Telephone calls would be out of the question- my voice would sound so different.

I wondered what I would look like when I was a vampire. It'd be nice to finally be beautiful, although I wouldn't hold a candle to any of the Cullen women.

As I was wandering along not really paying attention to where I was going, I bumped into something warm and solid.

"Oof!" My breath shot out and I held my stomach, winded.

"Bella, are you okay?" I vaguely recognised the voice and looked up to place the face.

It was Josh.

"Wow you're rock solid Josh. Knocked all the breath out of me." I gasped and he laughed.

"Yeah all of us Quileute boys have that in common I guess."

I straightened up once I got my breath back and started to walk away. Hadn't Jasper told me to stay away from this guy?

But Josh just followed me.

"Are you skipping or something?" I asked, sounding a little sharper than I'd intended.

"Yeah." He grinned. "Why not?"

I rolled my eyes.

"Have you seen the weather out there?"

"It's fine. I don't feel the cold that much. So I hear you're coming up to the rez this Saturday?"

I frowned at him. Maybe Mike or someone had mentioned it.

"Yeah we're meant to be going to the beach. Although I won't exactly be getting a sun tan if the weather stays like this."

He laughed and the sound was so warm and natural I almost forgot what Jasper had told me.

"So you wanna come hang out at my house if the weather's crappy? I'm staying with my uncle, apparently he knows your dad pretty well."

"Oh." Josh couldn't be that bad if my dad knew his uncle. "I'm going to Cha… my dad's tonight actually."

"Yeah? Not hanging out with your boyfriend?" I stiffened. I didn't like his tone of voice. I wondered if he had some kind of problem with Jasper.

"I'm hanging out with Jazz later actually, after I've been. What's your uncle's name? I'll say hi for him."

_Good one Bella, now you'll see if his uncle actually does know Charlie._

"It's Billy Black. Apparently, they 'hang out." He made air quotations with his fingers.

"My uncle seriously thinks he's so cool." There was such affection in his voice that I couldn't bring myself to think badly of him. He couldn't be that bad if he spoke about his uncle like that surely?

"Oh I bet they must be a pair because my dad's _so_ down with the kids." I laughed to myself. Charlie was about as out of touch as it was possible to be.

"You're telling me! Billy actually asked me last week if I was going 'down to the hood.' I nearly died of embarrassment."

I laughed again.

"Poor you!" I checked my watch and hissed. "Crap you've kept me talking Josh and I'm ten minutes late. What the hell am I going to tell Mrs Janis?"

He held up his hands and grinned.

"Not my problem Bella. I wouldn't suggest you go in there without your full body armour on though; she's liable to rip you to shreds. She's a real battle-axe if you know what I mean."

I slapped myself in the head a couple of times, punctuating the action with a 'crap' every time. He grabbed my wrist.

"Hey no self-harming in my presence."

His hand was so hot I had to pull away.

"Jesus Christ Josh, are you sick or something? Your hand feels about a million degrees!"

He grinned at me, showing his perfect even white teeth.

"Nope, I'm always this temperature."

I eyeballed him, looking for signs of illness.

"Seriously I think you should go to the nurse or something."

He rolled his eyes.

"Chill Bella, I'm fine. What are you going to do about class?"

I thought for a few seconds and then threw my hands up.

"Screw it; I'll skip just this once. No one interesting in there anyway, it's only physics."

I was pretty dumb in school sometimes because I didn't go to primary school while I was living with Mark and Sarah. It was a constant struggle in class to keep up with everyone else.

"Cool. You can come and hang with me."

I suddenly realised exactly who I was talking to. The one guy that Jasper had warned me to stay away from. And now he wanted me to go and 'hang' with him somewhere? Not a snowball's chance in hell.

"Well maybe I should just go in anyway. Worst that can happen is that I'll get chewed out."

I sighed. Whilst I didn't want to go with Josh, I was not in the mood for a shouting match.

"Oh my god why is my life so damn COMPLICATED!"

Everything that had happened in the last couple of days was just piling down on top of me. I didn't know what to do about Charlie and Renee, Jasper hadn't told me anything about his scars, I didn't know if Jasper had been outside my hotel room from the first night I saw him, I didn't know how to deal with Jessica, and to top it all off the first person… well human I connected with as a friend was the one person I'd been warned away from. I felt like my head was about to explode with it all.

"Jeez Bella if you keep shouting like that someone's gonna come and ask us why the hell we're not in class."

I felt like punching something. Hard. Or banging my head against a brick wall because that was what this situation amounted to.

"I gotta get out of here." I muttered under my breath and started to walk towards the exit. I could see the car lot was covered in thick snow but I didn't really care.

I wanted, no I needed, to get outside and have some space to myself. To just _think_.

"Bella hey, where are you going? It's freezing outside."

"I don't care. Seeing as I'm skipping class I might as well go the whole hog."

Josh grabbed my arm and I spun around.

"I wouldn't suggest you touch me right now for two reasons. One, I am just in the right mood to totally kick your ass, and two, Jasper will probably bite my head off again."

He let go and I carried on towards my destination.

"What do you mean Jasper would bite your head off?"

I blinked a couple of times. I was pretty sure Josh was starting to…vibrate?

He was shaking and I stopped, forgetting my anger.

"Jeez Josh are you ok? I told you to go to the nurse. You're sick…"

"I'm not sick Bella." The shaking was slowing down now. "I just… thinking about that bloodsucker really gets me riled up."

I quickly looked around and grabbed his hand, towing him towards the exit. It wouldn't do to have this conversation in the corridor.

"Okay I get that you know about that because of some treaty thing but why do you feel the need to broadcast it?"

He looked completely shocked.

"You… I mean, you know?"

I looked at him, confused.

"Of course I know dumbass…"

I pushed open the double doors and felt the blast of cold air hit me.

"You know and you're _still_ dating him?"

I sucked in a breath of icy cold air.

"It's none of your business really is it?"

Who did he think he was, questioning my choices about Jasper? He looked angry now and Jasper's warning was rattling around in my brain.

_What have you got yourself into Bella?_

Josh started to shake again.

"Of course it is Bella! Sam told me to keep an eye on you, to keep you out of danger. At school at least. But it turns out that you already knew about the bloodsucker…" His voice turned acidic on the word and I stiffened.

"Watch what you say about him Josh. That's my boyfriend you're talking about."

He stared at me, wide-eyed.

"And now you're sticking up for him?" He laughed bitterly. "Oh this is just too much…"

I saw a movement in the trees over his shoulder and froze.

"Bella?"

I couldn't look at Josh. I couldn't look at anything other than the vampire that was advancing across the school parking lot towards me.

Vaguely I thought _I don't recognise him_ but the rest of my brain was taken up with pure, unadulterated fear. Time seemed to slow down as I stared down my own death.

His hair was black and collar length and his eyes were bright red. His skin was almost as pale as the snow around his feet but of course, he was still beautiful. He looked like a fallen angel. His nose was straight and his cheekbones were prominent through his milky skin. He held his head regally, almost as if he were a prince of some sort. I could appreciate the grace for a moment before everything whirred back to normal speed and my brain clicked into gear.

_I was going to die._

Suddenly I remembered that Josh was still stood in front of me. I think I screamed at him to run but I couldn't be sure. I did grab hold of his arm and swung him behind me with all my strength. I didn't see why he had to die along with me.

As I started to scream, the vampire straightened from his hunting crouch and disappeared. I knew he would be running across the parking lot.

Sure enough, about two seconds later I saw him reappear right in front of me. His arms crushed around my ribcage like bands of steel and all the breath was squeezed from my lungs.

I screamed and thrashed but it was futile. I watched in horror as his head descended and I felt the piercing pain in my neck.

_He's biting me._

My head was forced up to the sky but I could imagine my blood staining the snow red. The pain in my neck was like nothing I'd ever felt before. It was indescribable. Now I knew what all those victims had felt when Sarah had drained their blood dry.

_I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy._

My brain was running at a million miles an hour and everything seemed to go in slow motion. I felt the life draining from my body and I desperately tried to hold on to life.

_I don't want to die._

I was vaguely aware that I was still screaming as I felt the hold on me suddenly release and I fell face first into the snow.

_Was this what dying felt like?_

A picture of Jasper's face rose up behind my eyelids and I smiled.

If I was dying then Jasper would be the last thing I would ever see. I had no time for any other thoughts as the blackness descended upon me.

_Jasper… I love you_.


	20. Chapter 20

I had no time for any other thoughts as the blackness descended upon me.

_Jasper… I love you_.

All I felt was pain, my body was screaming with it. It felt like every nerve in my body was on fire. This was worse than when I'd been bitten. I'd take that a million times over this.

I couldn't think coherently, my brain was concentrating on holding my body together. The liquid fire was coursing through my veins, consuming all before it.

I burned. The passage of time was non-existent. My heart was beating so fast it felt like it was about to burst right out of my rib cage.

The pain overwhelmed my system and I couldn't even open my mouth to cry out. Why couldn't I scream?

If this was dying, I didn't want it. Wasn't it meant to be a relief from pain? Maybe I was in hell. Maybe I would feel like this for eternity.

I burned. My senses had shut down and all I could feel was the pain. It seemed to go on forever before I felt it waning a little. It still licked at my every fibre of my being, but I had the feeling that it was lessening.

The pain consumed me. I wanted to rip my body apart, anything, anything to get rid of this. I couldn't live through this pain.

Suddenly, time came to mean something again and I felt stronger. I knew when I had control over my fingers and toes but I did nothing. It wouldn't matter because the fire was still raging white hot.

Then I found my voice and I began to scream. The fire was tearing through my vocal chords and every part of my body.

Burning, burning.

My hearing became slowly clearer but it didn't matter. I could hear the galloping of my heart and used it to count the time.

My senses continued to sharpen and when new sounds came, I could hear them.

The tapping of footsteps and the swish of a door as it opened.

I felt the pressure of a hand on mine but no temperature. I had no concept of cold when my whole body was consumed with white hot heat. I felt it when the pressure left and I missed it. It reminded me in a way that I was alive.

It was different again when I gained control of my arms and legs. I began to thrash, to try and tear away my own skin and let the air cool the fire. It was useless. Pressure on my arms and legs, holding me down.

I screamed in agony and thrashed in pain and it made no difference. The fire still burned.

I could vaguely hear voices and I fancied that one of them was Jasper's.

"Bella, Bella."

I wanted to cry. This was a cruel torture. I was burning alive and now I was hearing the one thing I wanted most in the entire world. And I couldn't reach it.

Another voice broke in. It sounded a little like Carlisle.

"It's lessening Jasper. She's almost done."

I grabbed onto those words with a fierceness that surprised me. I hoped that he meant it was nearly over. Maybe this was my passage to the other side. Maybe I had to burn before I could die.

My brain cried out for relief from the flames. My whole body felt white hot.

My pain lessened a little more and I was hopeful. What was happening? I didn't understand.

I felt a cool breath on my ear and I wanted to cry for joy. Was it my Jasper?

_Speak to me my love. Just once before I die._

"I know it hurts Bella." He sounded sad and I wanted to comfort him. But the fire weighted my limbs down and I couldn't even open my eyes.

"I know it hurts, but it's nearly over now. The vampire didn't kill you Bella but enough venom was there to change you."

I understood now. I was burning so I could be with Jasper. My body was transforming from flesh to smooth cool marble. Such a gift had to come with a price. But this price was too much to pay.

"Bella I'm sorry. Bella I love you." Jasper's voice. It echoed inside my head while the fire consumed me.

There was so much space in my head now for thinking. I wondered who the vampire was who had bitten me and brought on this torture. I wondered how long this would last. I wondered if Jasper was ok. I wished that he didn't have to listen to me screaming.

"She's in agony Carlisle. I can't stand it. Why didn't that stupid mutt save her _before_ she got bitten?"

"He's young Jasper and he didn't expect it. You can't blame him son."

I heard Jasper sigh.

"I can't blame Alice either, she's so torn up about it I don't have the heart."

"She feels very guilty that he somehow slipped by her. This is very hard on her Jasper."

"And it isn't hard on me? I have to sit here and watch the girl I love in agony, and you think that isn't hard? She didn't choose this Carlisle."

"I know son and I know you're angry right now. But this would have happened sometime if you wanted to be with her forever."

Pressure again, on my forehead this time. It felt like a kiss.

"I'm so sorry Bella. I love you."

And suddenly, inexplicably, the pain intensified in my throat. It was a different kind of pain though. More like… thirst.

This distracted me from listening and I screamed louder. I felt the pain retreat ever so slightly from my fingers and toes and I marvelled. Was this it? Was it going to be over soon?

And then it happened. The fire in my heart doubled in intensity, raging above and beyond the rest of my body. My heartbeat picked up. I didn't think it was possible for it to beat any faster but the fire drove it to new heights.

"Hear that Jasper? It's nearly over son." Carlisle's voice was so distinct. It came from my left.

"Esme, Alice, Emmet, Rose." Jasper's voice was quiet but I knew they'd hear him from wherever they were in the house.

I heard their separate footsteps as they entered the room, the swishing of clothing, and the rhythmic quality of their breathing. I could tell simply by their footsteps where they were stood in the room.

I marvelled while I burned.

The pain was draining from my limbs now. My wrists and my ankles were totally free and I revelled for a moment in the blessed coolness.

Then the fire ripped through my chest, hotter still. I screamed louder. How could this pain even exist? How was this even possible?

"Oh Bella." Esme's voice. She sounded like she was crying. Or at least she would be, if vampires could cry.

"It's ok Bells, it'll be over soon." That was Emmett's voice.

The pain depleted in my knees and elbows and the relief from that fought with the intensifying pain in my chest.

My heartbeat became one single noise and it felt like it would break through my ribs.

My screaming became sobbing and words.

"My heart…"

"Oh Bella darlin' I know. Just a little longer, just hold on. I love you."

That was Jasper, he was next to me. I held onto that voice through the white hot pain. He wouldn't lie to me. It would be over soon.

The flames had left the rest of my body and were now concentrated in my heart. I was amazed my heart was still beating. Surely, it had been consumed?

With one final unbearable surge, my heart stuttered and then stopped completely.

All I could register at first was the absence of the pain. Then I opened my eyes and the world was new.

I could see every single dust mote that floated in the air and the texture of the beams in the ceiling. The plaster of the ceiling was filled with miniscule cracks and I was fascinated for a moment.

Then I heard them breathing. My family. And a surge of love threatened to overwhelm my body and throw me off whatever I was lying on. This new body had such a capacity to love. It was bigger than anything I had experienced while human.

I heard Jasper catch his breath and frowned. What was wrong?

"Jasper?" Carlisle's voice. It sounded very different to my new hearing. I wondered what Jasper's voice would sound like.

"It's so strong… the love Carlisle." I could hear the shock and awe in his voice and I was absorbing the scents in the room. Jasper's most of all because he was closest to me. It was beyond anything I had ever smelt before and I turned my head to him.

I felt the shock hit my system as I stared at his face. I had never truly seen it before. With human eyes, I hadn't been able to see the scars on his neck but I could see them now and they frightened me.

How many vampires had torn into him?

Then I felt a sudden surge of white hot anger.

How dare they touch my Jasper? I heard a feral snarl rip from my lips and the entire family tensed.

They were so many emotions I didn't know which one to concentrate on.

Love, which was the strongest. And awe too. Jasper was so beautiful.

I swallowed quickly, needing to speak.

"Jasper?"

I was shocked, my voice sounded musical, like bells pealing.

Suddenly I was moving. I flipped off whatever I was lying on in a movement so fast the room should have been blurring. But it didn't, and I landed gracefully on my feet.

Jasper stayed in his crouch and I felt my body tense. His scars were screaming danger at me and I allowed myself a moment of shock and fear before the love took over again. And I forgot that the scars were dangerous because this was Jasper. And I loved him with everything I had. The love burst out from my body.

I saw him take the hit as he absorbed it. The family took a nervous step forward but he waved them back.

"It's the love, it's overwhelming."

Emmett sniggered to himself and I snarled a warning.

"If you say so much as one word Emmett so help me I will rip your head off."

His signature booming laugh echoed in the room and I couldn't help grinning. Emmett was just the same as always. It was just that this time around my threats actually carried some weight.

I took a nervous step towards Jasper and everyone tensed.

"For god's sake I'm not about to attack him!" I complained, angry now.

I saw Jasper clutch his stomach as he absorbed that as well.

"Bella darlin', calm down…"

I immediately felt guilty. I was hurting Jasper.

"I'm sorry Jazz."

One moment I was thinking about how I wished I could stop him feeling my emotions and then suddenly I was cocooned.

A bubble surrounded me, but it wasn't round. It was egg-shaped but completely clear, like shimmering glass.

I saw everyone gape in shock but I couldn't hear their gasps of amazement.

My new brain processed everything in seconds. So this was my power. This… shield that appeared to block sound.

I snorted. Fat lot of good that would be in a fight.

I saw Jasper's mouth move but I couldn't hear the words. I pointed to my ear and shook my head, indicating that I couldn't hear him.

I tentatively reached out a hand to touch the edge of the bubble. It felt solid and smooth to the touch. Again, the comparison to glass came immediately to mind. When I tried to push my hand out through the barrier, I found I couldn't.

I frowned and pushed harder, but the surface wouldn't give. So it blocked physical movement too.

I guessed that it blocked mental attacks and that was why Edward hadn't been able to read my mind, even when I was human.

I had figured this out in the space of about five seconds and now I looked up again.

"Ah." I said, even though they couldn't hear me. "Now I need to get back out."

I pushed down the panicky feelings that were rising in my throat. Once I thought about my throat, I felt the thirst burst into life. It was a painful, itching sensation and I put a hand to my throat.

But I forced it from my mind and concentrated on removing the bubble. It was surprisingly easy, like peeling back clingfilm.

I had got it half way when Jasper's voice distracted me.

"Bella are you ok?" He sounded panicky and I sought to reassure him.

"I'm fine."

Just the simple action of speaking broke my concentration and the bubble flew back into place again with a resounding snap.

I snarled in frustration and then sighed, closing my eyes and feeling for the edges again.

They must have known not to speak and distract me, because the room was silent apart from the rhythmic sounds of their breathing.

Finally, the bubble was gone and I felt the impact as Jasper grabbed me into a tight hug.

For a few moments, I just breathed in his scent and revelled in the feel of his arms around me.

Emmett coughed loudly.

"Jazz you're projecting."

I could only imagine what emotions were going through Jasper right now and the rest of the family probably didn't really want to feel them.

So I snapped my bubble up around us. I felt Jasper let go of me and I opened my eyes again.

"Bella darlin'. I missed you."

I felt the love radiating off Jasper in waves and I welcomed it.

I forgot that we had company and simply reacted on instinct. I leaned into him and pressed my lips to his.

I vaguely knew in the back of my head that Emmett was probably laughing his head off right now and wished we were invisible.

But most of my vampire brain was taken up with the sweet sensation of kissing Jasper in this body.

I tangled my hands in his curls and opened my mouth at the welcome insistence of his tongue.

I felt the familiar liquid fire enter my bones as our tongues danced together and I was sure I'd touched perfection.

With no polite cough to separate us, we simply stayed like that, sometimes moving anxiously against each other in need.

Then Jasper wrenched his head away and I felt irritation flood my system.

He laughed, breathless as I was and I felt it melt away immediately.

"Bella…" He touched a hand to my face and I was shocked at the temperature of his skin. It felt normal, it felt warm to me.

"I love you Jazz."

I instinctively leaned into his touch and then opened my eyes as I felt shockwaves around the edges of my shield.

I snarled, sensing danger, and was confronted with the hysterical sight of Emmett banging on it. No doubt, he was trying to interrupt us.

If I was human I would have blushed, but there was no blood to rush to my cheeks now.

I grinned sheepishly at him, but he didn't respond. He just carried on banging his fists against the edges of my shield.

I took in the faces of the rest of the family. They all looked shocked and scared, and the pieces snapped into place in my mind.

"Jasper, they can't see us." I hissed and grabbed his hand.

"This power of yours is pretty useful darlin'." He chuckled.

"Oh look at Emmett!" I felt the first stirrings of laugher but forced them down.

"I think I wished for us to be invisible. I better do something, they look afraid."

I closed my eyes and felt for the edges of my shield. I could feel the vibrations from Emmett's fists running through it, but I ignored them. I concentrated on it being clear, because at the moment it was shot through with shimmers of black. When they disappeared, I figured I might as well try to remove the sound block as well. I watched as it became even more transparent in my mind's eye and then opened my eyes.

I took great delight in scaring the hell out of Emmett, who was frozen in shock in front of us, by snarling as loudly as I could.

I then proceeded to dissolve into peals of hysterical laughter. Jasper joined in within seconds.

"Bella I would appreciate it if you could stop laughing for a moment and concentrate." Even Carlisle sounded slightly amused.

I stopped laughing and pulled in a couple of calming breaths. The action felt strange because I didn't really need to do it.

The action brought a fresh whiff of Jasper to my nose and I tensed against the wave of lust buffeting my system.

"Damn Bella…" Jasper muttered as I straightened.

"Yeah damn is right." I whispered under my breath, turning to face Carlisle.

He smiled, seeing that he had my attention.

"I must admit that I'm extremely curious about the extent of your power Bella. It might be the strongest I've ever seen. Can you tell me anything about it?"

I nodded and straightened my thoughts into some semblance of order.

"The first time the bubble came up it was because I was upset that I was hurting Jasper. As far as I could tell it kept out sound, physical and mental attacks."

Jasper took my hand again and squeezed.

"I couldn't feel Bella's emotions while she was inside the bubble but I did once I was inside too."

I smiled at him and continued.

"I suppose the best way to describe it is that if I wish for something while I'm inside the bubble it takes on certain attributes. For example, I wished for us to be invisible and I imagine the bubble made us invisible."

Carlisle nodded and I was pleased with my new vampire mind. I was smart when I had such a big brain. I felt like I could think a million things at once and not one of them would be lost.

"I removed the sound block from the shield by concentrating on it becoming more transparent. It's flexible, though strong." I smirked. "Obviously, since even Emmett couldn't break through it."

Carlisle nodded again.

"It is visible to us, its egg shaped, correct?"

I nodded, becoming frustrated with the conversation. My newborn instincts were screaming at me that it was time to go and rip a hole in something warm and drink its blood.

Respect for Carlisle kept my feet rooted to the ground. I supposed to all intents and purposes he was my father now.

My voice came out sounding calm.

"I'm sorry Carlisle but I really need to go and hunt."

His face changed subtly, as if he had forgotten about it.

Edward nodded behind him.

"Yes it is quite remarkable."

I frowned at him and he smiled politely.

"Carlisle was just thinking that your control was amazingly good for a newborn. By rights you should have been ripping holes in the furniture the minute you woke up."

"Oh."

I almost laughed. That little word reminded me of my human life.

Charlie. Renee. Josh. It all came flooding back and I felt guilty that I had forgotten about them until now, like a child obsessed with a shiny new toy.

"What happened to Josh? Is he okay?" I asked, searching their faces for answers. They were implacable.

"Go and hunt Bella, we can talk when you come back."

My thirst warred with the need to know what had happened.

I let go of Jasper's hand and was on the window ledge before half a second could pass.

"We'll be back soon." Of course I expected that Jasper would come with me. My _mate_. I tried out the new word in my thoughts and felt a warm pleasant feeling wash over me, mixed in with possessiveness.

I expected the ground to come rushing up to meet me when I jumped, but it was almost painfully slow. I absorbed the impact in the balls of my feet and grinned to myself.

Jasper followed me down, obviously feeling my pleasure.

"Shall we darlin'?"

He took my hand again and we raced towards the forest, readying ourselves for the hunt.


	21. Chapter 21

**A/n I don't write lemons so you'll have to use your own imagination here guys, beyond what I've written. Same thing for the meadow, we all have our own personal mental picture of the meadow. Peace and love guys (*^_^*)**

It was easy to slip into the state of mind needed for hunting. It was all instinct.

I breathed in, processing all the different scents in a second and exploding into a run.

There was a bear to the east – it smelled warm and appetising.

I felt Jasper running behind me and barely contained a snarl. This might be my kill but that was my Jasper.

Still, I growled slightly to remind him that I wouldn't share.

I took the bear down easily and my teeth slid through its skin like butter. The warm blood slid down my throat, lessening the burn to some extent but not completely extinguishing it.

I came back to my right mind a little, as I wondered what to do with the carcass. Did I just leave it there in the woods?

I heard Jasper shift behind me and turned my head.

"Bella darlin'?"

If I had still been in hunting mode I probably would have snarled at him to keep off my kill.

"We bury whatever we've killed, just to avoid suspicion."

I buried the bear in the soft earth quickly and turned to him.

"Is that okay?" I was slowly getting used to my own voice sounding so different.

He smiled and I felt everything was right with the world.

"That's perfect sugar."

How I had missed him while I burned! It sounded unbelievably corny, but I truly did feel like he was the other half of my soul.

I moved closer and pressed my body to his. I felt like I wanted to move under his skin, just to be near him. His hands went beneath the hem of my t-shirt and I purred loudly. I was a bit shocked at the sound coming from my throat. I sounded like a tiger or something.

I was quickly distracted by the feel of Jasper's hands on my ribcage. The purring increased in volume and I moved restlessly. Deciding that I shouldn't be the only one dying by sweet degrees I reached up the back of his shirt and lightly dragged my nails down his skin.

"Bella…" He groaned. I smiled. Jasper was the one purring now. I shifted my hands round to the front of his waist, moving my fingers gently over his smooth skin, feeling the ridges of his scars. When I started to trace the muscles in his stomach his control snapped and his mouth crashed down on mine.

Until now, I had no idea how much he'd been holding back when I was still human. He didn't have to be careful not to break me anymore.

All rational consciousness was drowned in need. I barely felt it as my back rammed into a tree with a snap. We'd probably broken the trunk.

I couldn't think, I could only feel. The passion built to an unbearable level and I rammed Jasper's lower body onto mine. I needed more.

Suddenly, from nowhere, a new scent appeared in the air. We broke apart quickly, still holding each other.

"Someone's coming." I said and automatically tensed my muscles ready to spring at whoever entered the clearing.

Jasper stood beside me as we watched the female vampire break through the tree line, walking quite slowly for one of our kind.

She was beautiful, with midnight black hair that fell to her waist in spirals, and I automatically went into a defensive crouch. My instinct was to protect my mate. Physically at least she looked to be the same age as me and Edward.

She took a step forward and a snarl ripped from my throat that was so untamed and animalistic she stopped immediately.

She smiled at me and began to speak.

"My name is Angeline. And you are Bella, yes?"

I was in no mood for pleasant conversation so I simply growled instead. Jasper was crouched beside me, lips pulled back from his teeth in warning.

"My friend Edwin was the one who changed you."

I absorbed this information quickly. If the vampire who changed me was her mate, we would have a serious fight on our hands. But she had said 'friend' not mate.

"I understand he is dead?"

I nodded quickly, still untrusting of this new female. Jasper was clearly suspicious too because he had not risen out of his crouch.

"What is your business here?" He asked stiffly and she kept looking at me for a few seconds before turning her head to him.

"Edwin and I came from Volturi to try out your… unusual diet. I didn't particularly like draining humans and Edwin was always willing to try new things. Obviously, he could not control himself when he saw you Bella. The female who was protecting the school could not see him because of his ability."

She noted our defensive stances and sighed before continuing.

"He could create illusions, change his scent, appearance, voice, everything. So he simply changed his scent to one of yours and went after Bella undetected."

"Whilst this information is welcome I do not see your purpose here." Jasper said, still growling a little.

She blinked at him, obviously surprised.

"Why, I want to join your little coven."

I was shocked.

"What about Edwin?"

She seemed to understand what I meant and shook her head.

"Our bond was nothing beyond a tentative friendship. The drinking of human blood does not allow for the creation of such strong bonds as your family holds. I do not seek revenge for his death."

Jasper moved from his crouch and I waited a couple of seconds, snarling, before following. If she made any sign of wanting to hurt my family, I would rip her limb from limb. Jasper gave me a kiss and I forgot my anger for a moment.

"She's telling the truth darlin', there's no sense of anger in her emotions."

I relaxed completely then, trusting Jasper to know more about this sort of thing than I did.

"You'd be better speaking with my father Carlisle." Jasper told her and she inclined her head regally.

"I will follow you."

We began to run back to the house and I revelled in the speed of it.

The rest of the family were already outside when we approached and I saw Emmett grin. He was probably anticipating a fight.

"Carlisle, this is Angeline. Her _friend_ Edwin was the one who changed me." I told him, emphasising the word friend.

He looked at her curiously but it was Edward's face that caught my attention. He looked… interested was the only word that sprang to mind.

_He was interested in Angeline?! Hmm…_

"It's a pleasure to meet you Angeline. This is my family." Jasper and I moved to stand at the end of the line next to Esme. She smiled at me and squeezed my hand a little before turning back to Angeline.

"Edwin and I came from Volturi to try your diet Carlisle. I seek no revenge for his death."

Carlisle looked at Edward, obviously asking him to confirm this information by reading Angeline's thoughts. He nodded and Carlisle turned back to her.

"If you can abstain from your previous diet I will try to help you as much as possible." He smiled at her but it was Edward her eyes were on.

"Excuse us a moment please."

She nodded and we retreated to a safe distance so as not to be heard.

Emmett started grinning immediately.

"I bet I know what Eddie's vote is going to be. He was practically dribbling on her."

Rosalie's hand came up and cracked him in the back of the head, as usual. Emmett was only telling the truth though. Edward had shown an interest in Angeline and I found myself wondering vaguely if the one of the two lone vampires in the family would find a mate. Alice would be the only one left without a partner then.

Rosalie spoke up, looking tense.

"I don't think we know her well enough to let her into the family. If she slips up even once we'll have to move again."

Everyone nodded in agreement and Carlisle spoke next.

"I think we should try and help her if she wants to change her diet. If we turn her away, it will always be on my conscience – thinking how many human lives we could have saved."

I spoke up next.

"I agree with Rosalie but seeing as I'm not going to be going to school any time soon I don't see a reason why I couldn't stay with her to make sure she doesn't slip up."

Emmett looked at me and grinned.

"You're not exactly the most experienced fighter Bells."

I rolled my eyes at him.

"Have you forgotten my power Emmett? I'll just stick her in a bubble, easy as that."

"I wouldn't feel easy leaving Bella alone with her but we can't all skip school until we're sure she won't feed on the humans." Jasper sounded torn and I grabbed his hand.

"I won't be on my own, Esme will be here too."

I smiled at the woman I was going to consider my mother from now on and she smiled back.

"I think we should give the poor thing a chance after coming all the way here to see us." She agreed.

Carlisle turned to Alice.

"Can you see what she will do Alice?"

She nodded and her eyes went dreamy and unfocused, like she was looking at a far away object. I'd never seen Alice having a vision before.

"It looks like she'll be fine. I think we should let her join." She said, smiling over at Edward.

"It would be nice for Edward I think."

He looked a little embarrassed.

"I only just met her not twenty seconds ago, don't go planning anything yet Alice."

She rolled her eyes but didn't say anything else.

Emmett spoke up next.

"I say let her in, she'll be a bit of fun for stuffy old Eddie."

Edward hissed at him and I laughed.

Carlisle looked round at us all.

"So that's a yes then?"

We all nodded and flew back over to where we'd left Angeline, letting Carlisle speak for the family.

"We've decided to ask you to stay with us until you desire to leave Angeline."

She smiled at him, red eyes shining in the gloom. My human memories were fuzzy but I could remember that there was something about red eyes that frightened me. I moved closer to Jasper's side, seeking comfort. He slung an arm around my shoulders and I immediately relaxed.

"Thank you Carlisle. And the rest of you. I understand your concern that I may not be able to keep up with your diet but I promise that I will not kill on your land or any other in this area."

This seemed to seal the deal so I smiled at her, feeling distinctly friendlier now. Carlisle started the introductions.

"As you already know I'm Carlisle and this is my wife Esme." Esme smiled kindly at Angeline.

Carlisle indicated Emmett and Rosalie next.

"These are my children Emmett and Rosalie." Emmett grinned at her but Rosalie still looked a little tense. They were standing together to signal that they were mates.

"My daughter Alice," she smiled and waved a little, "and my son Edward." They were standing apart, at opposite ends of the line on their own. Edward smiled and inclined his head at her, much as she had done in the forest to us.

"And finally Bella and Jasper, who you've already met."

Angeline smiled graciously at us all. She really was beautiful. Her smile turned up a notch when she looked at Edward and I held back a smile of my own. She would be good for my brother if she could hold back her thirst.

"It's nice to meet you all."

I still needed to hunt to completely quench my thirst and I figured everyone would want to talk to the new addition. While I was curious myself, the thirst won out.

So I tugged on Jasper's hand and he immediately seemed to know what I wanted.

"We were in the middle of hunting so we're gonna head out again."

Carlisle nodded at us and we were off and running once again.

We ran past the tree we had broken before and I would have blushed if I could.

Jasper clearly felt my embarrassment because he chuckled.

"That's something we're going to have to talk about when we're done."

I frowned and was about to ask what he was talking about. Then I smelt a young buck and the thought was lost in the thrill of the hunt.

When I had finished and buried the body, I turned to Jasper.

"Aren't you hunting too?"

"I was happy just watching you darlin'."

I smiled at him and ran over.

"I feel a lot better now, I'll come with you."

Watching Jasper hunt was a pleasure in itself. He was so graceful and quick in his kills I couldn't help wondering if I had looked clumsy to him before.

When he was finished burying the remains he straightened and took my hand again.

"I want to take you somewhere darlin'."

I smiled at him.

"Let's go."

It was easy to follow his scent through the forest. I felt like I would have known it had I been a million miles away.

We emerged into a meadow. It was beautiful under the moonlight and I caught my breath. It was carpeted in flowers and the scent was almost overwhelming. It gently shelved down to a little stream at the bottom.

"Do you like it? Sometimes I come here when I need to think or get away from all the emotions for a while."

Jasper's scars were clearly visible in the moonlight but they didn't bother me anymore.

"It's perfect Jazz."

He smiled and lay down on the grass. I stretched out beside him and stared up at the sky.

"It makes you feel kind of small doesn't it? I wonder how many stars there are up there…" I asked, not really expecting an answer.

"Bella you know I love you don't you?"

I looked at him and smiled happily.

"Not half as much as I love you."

He returned my smile then and propped himself up on one elbow to trace a fiery line down my cheekbone.

"I've been holding myself back until now Bella, for fear of breaking you while you were still human. And it seems we keep getting interrupted otherwise."

I would have blushed if I could have.

"Oh my god Jazz, please telling me we're not going to have _that_ conversation…"

He laughed at my embarrassment and pressed a gentle kiss to my forehead.

"I'm ashamed to say darlin' that I don't know much about your human partners…"

I turned my face away in mortification.

"I'm still a virgin if that's what you're asking."

His fingers wound into my hair and gently pulled my head back to face him.

"I won't lie to you darlin'; you won't be my first physically. But emotionally and mentally it will be like the first time, because I've never made love to anyone that I loved like I do you."

I couldn't bring myself to be jealous or annoyed with Jasper for not being as innocent as I was. He was the man… well vampire, that he was and neither of us could change the past. And as innocent as I was, I knew that I wanted this.

So I just smiled and reached up to catch his hand. I pressed a kiss across each knuckle and held it to where my beating heart would be.

"I don't think now is the time to worry about sounding cheesy so I'll just come out and say it. I love you Jasper, truly, heart and soul. And that leads to me wanting to share everything I have with you. That includes my body."

I could feel the pure happiness and love in the air around us, mixed with a good dose of lust. Jasper was projecting.

"Bella darlin' I'm a simple man - I'm a soldier so I don't have all the pretty words. But if I had a beating heart and, if I do have a soul, then they'd be yours."

"That's all I need to hear." I whispered and we made love with only the stars and moon to witness.

**A/n okay that was the cheesiest bit of fluff I have ever written haha, but you have to love it anyway. R&R as always guys and gals**


	22. Chapter 22

Of course, if I was still human I would have slept afterwards, but vampires didn't need sleep. Nor did I particularly miss it at the moment because I was lying cradled against Jasper and nothing in the world could feel better. Now I knew why people were so enthuastic about sex – I felt as if I was floating on Cloud Nine.

I heard Jasper's laugh rumble in his chest and lifted my head from it to look at him.

"You're so blissed out darlin; it does wonders for my ego." He grinned at me and there was only one thought in my head.

_Thank you God for creating this beautiful, wonderful, person and allowing me to call them my own_.

There had never been any doubt before but now our relationship, our bond, felt absolutely solid. I knew that I would die for him and that he would do the same. There were no more questions, no more thoughts of inadequacy from either side. It was simple to explain. We had gone from being two souls to one.

I couldn't even bring myself to care about what Emmett would say when we went back with grass-stained clothes and smiles as wide as the Grand Canyon on our faces. I could always stick him in a bubble if he really annoyed me anyway.

I felt the not-so-subtle change in my body temperature as Jasper shifted me closer to him.

"I love you too."

One of the perks of having an empath for a mate was there was never any need to tell them that you loved them. Because they could _feel_ it radiating off you in waves.

The sky was starting to lighten now as it became early morning but I found myself unable to summon the will to move. I didn't feel tired, because vampires didn't, I just felt a bone-deep contentment lying here in Jasper's arms.

"Tell me we don't ever have to go back." I pouted, trailing kisses down Jasper's clavicle.

"If you keep doing that darlin' I can promise you that." He groaned.

A little devil rose up in me but I ignored it and rolled away.

"Ugh." It was a single noise of frustration but it released my feelings quite nicely.

"I guess we better go back. We should probably spend some time with Angeline."

Jasper sighed and I giggled. I think it was the first time I'd ever seen him sigh. Jasper was so… solid. Unbidden, thoughts started rising up in my head again.

_Whoa there Bella. You better rein those horses in_!

I twisted away and dressed quickly, before my body could overrule my mind. I was starting to hate Angeline with a passion.

I laughed at myself for being so silly and felt a slight twinge of regret because Jasper was clothed again.

"Regret? Oh darlin'…"

I interrupted him before he could start feeling sorry for himself.

"Not for the reason you're thinking. I definitely do not regret what we just did. It was more a regret that you had some clothes on."

If I could have blushed then I would have. Jasper held a twinkle in his beautiful amber eyes.

"Oh if that was the reason then I think staying here is a very good idea darlin'."

I groaned.

"Oh god, don't tempt me."

He laughed and took my hand.

"We really should be getting back."

We ran back to the house in record time. Jasper was fast but I just about beat him, thanks to my newborn strength.

I felt like I could have floated through the walls, but I chose to use the more usual method of opening the door and walking through it.

Of course, Emmett was the first one to greet me and we exchanged matching grins.

"Good hunt little sis?"

"Yep I found everything I needed."

He waggled his eyebrows and I burst out laughing. Jasper walked in behind me and I felt his hand move to rest on my waist.

Emmett looked pointedly at it and the grass stains on our clothes.

"I don't think I even want to know Bells."

I smiled sweetly at him, feeling mischievous.

"Oh really Emmett? I thought you'd want a full description, perhaps with diagrams."

I ran up the staircase laughing before he could get over his shock and respond. I could hear Alice in her room and I knocked on the door before going in.

"Hi Bella." She was sat on her bed reading a fashion magazine but she put it down as I walked in and smiled at me.

"Hey Alice." I lay down on the bed next to her, stretching out to my full length.

She laughed and it was a tiny tinkling sound, like bells.

"Comfy much?"

"So have you talked to Angeline?"

"Yeah." She nodded and I could see the acceptance in her eyes.

"What about this whole thing that's going on with her and Edward?"

"Oh well," she grinned "I figured it was too soon to bring that up."

I nodded sagely.

"Probably only wise. What room is she in, I should probably go and say hi."

"She's next door to Edward."

We smirked at each other.

"Oh what a coincidence!" I replied, my voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Isn't it just?" She laughed and I skipped lightly from the room. I could tell that Angeline was in her room by following her smell.

I knocked gently on the door before going in.

"Angeline?"

The shock of what I saw hit me like a wrecking ball. I was not expecting Edward to move quite _that_ fast. He was lying on top of Angeline, clearly kissing her senseless. I was just thankful they were still fully clothed.

Suddenly the scene disappeared and it was just Angeline standing in front of me.

"Oh Bella! I'm sorry, I wasn't expecting anyone."

I stared at her in disbelief.

"What was _that_?"

She smiled sheepishly.

"Well as you know Edwin's ability was to create illusions. My ability is similar but I sort of project my thoughts into the room. Imagine it like a film being projected onto a wall."

"And that's what you were thinking?" I couldn't help a tiny smirk as she stared at her feet in obvious discomfort.

"Yes. I know we only met today but…"

"This is great!" She looked up at me in shock and I smiled. "Listen, I may not have been here long but I consider Edward my brother, and anything that makes him happy makes me happy."

"Oh. Well, thanks." She smiled widely at me and I grinned back.

I was just so happy at the moment there was no room for embarrassment.

"No problem. By the way, welcome to the family."

And with that parting shot, I bounced off downstairs to find Jasper.

He was sat on the couch with Emmett watching a baseball game and I quickly moved to sit next to him. He reached over and picked me up, settling me quickly in his lap.

I curled myself so I fitted into his body and dropped my head onto his chest.

Life just did not get much better than this. I reached my hand up and starting messing with one of Jasper's curls. I felt so relaxed that I knew if I'd still been human, I would have been dropping off to sleep. It was a strange feeling, because part of my brain was telling me that I should be asleep right now, and the other part was revelling in the fact that I was awake.

My mind began to wander and reality crashed in hard. I'd forgotten about them all. Charlie, Renee and Josh. I'd been so wrapped up in my own little world that I hadn't spared them a thought since I'd woken up. Well that probably wasn't the right phrase to use, because I'd never been asleep.

I felt more than a little guilty but I knew the Cullens would have told me right away if anything had been seriously wrong with Josh. Emmett stood up and declared he was bored.

"Go and find Rosalie." Jasper told him.

"Are you sure it's safe leaving you two here alone?" He grinned at me. "There better still be a couch here tomorrow Bella."

I stuck my tongue out at his retreating back and turned to Jasper.

"Can you tell me what happened now?"

He nodded and shifted me a little so I was facing him.

"What do you remember about the attack?"

"I remember Edwin coming across the lot and screaming at Josh to get out of the way." I frowned. My human memories were a little fuzzy.

"I think I pushed him then I remember Edwin biting me."

Jasper's arms tightened around me and I welcomed the sign of support and comfort.

"Then I fell into the snow and blacked out."

"There's no way to break this to you gently darlin' so I'll just come out and say it. Josh is a werewolf."

I stared at him.

"What, like howling at a full moon type werewolf?"

"No, more like a shape shifter."

I had a vague memory of Josh vibrating in front of me in the corridor.

"Oh, I see."

Once you believed in the existence of vampires, nothing much else came to shock you.

"Josh phased, that's what they call it when they shift into the wolf body, and managed to pull Edwin off you. He got there too late; the venom was already in your body. Alice came running once she realised what was going on and together they managed to rip Edwin apart and burn the pieces."

"But Josh and Alice weren't hurt in any way?"

"No darlin' they're both fine."

"Then you brought me back here?"

He nodded.

"It took you three days to complete the change."

"What did you tell Charlie and Renee?"

"Well you already had the perfect excuse really – your adoptive parents."

"But why would they believe that from anyone else but me?"

He smiled.

"We can be quite persuasive when we want to be."

I grinned at him. He'd dazzled my poor parents?

"I bet you can." My face fell a little. "I'm going to miss them. In a way, I'm sort of glad that I didn't know them that well. I know that sounds bad."

"Not at all darlin'. That way it's easier for everybody."

"So is everyone up at La Push a werewolf?"

"We don't know the exact details; Josh didn't exactly hang about after the attack, but from what he told us there's about ten of them in the pack."

I thought for a moment. Wasn't Josh living with his uncle or something?

"Does his uncle know?"

Jasper nodded.

"His uncle is Billy Black, one of the direct descendents of the first tribe members to phase. Of course, back then they called them spirit warriors."

"Does the treaty still stand?"

"Yes, we don't hunt on Quileute land."

I nodded and dropped my head back onto his chest – trying to think if there were any other questions I wanted to ask.

"Are you going to tell me about your past eventually Jazz?"

"I'd tell you now, but I think you've had enough information for one day. Even vampires get mentally tired."

I knew that he'd keep his word and get round to it eventually, so I simply snuggled closer and sighed in satisfaction.

**Okay guys now we have our happy ending (sort of) I'm gonna end this fan fic here. If you guys want I'll do a sequel which will probably explain about Jasper's past etc and maybe even bring the poison pair back because, lets face it, this wouldn't be complete without their triumphant return. And obviously, we have to work out the whole thing with Edward and Angeline. And Alice needs to find a mate too… Oh and don't forget Josh and the pack.**

**I'm just a bit disillusioned with this story at the moment so I'm ending it here. PM or review if you want a sequel and I'll write it when I'm feeling a bit more jazzed up with this story **

**Peace and love guys and sorry for ending it here (*^_^*)**


End file.
